Sunday, October 21
ahh im gna miss my 4 year old blog. but its time to move on to wordpress
http://likewiseme.wordpress.com/
its still not very ncie yet, working on it. figuring it out
visit it if you're free.
mm.
harrypotter symphonic suite brought back certain sad memories.sigh. oh well(:
[em]ily_ 11:27 PM
Saturday, October 20
im moving to wordpress soon, once i figured it, i got the page alr..just making it look better.
i guess sams rite, i should stop. sigh.keep all these pain in my diaries.mm. aslongasyou'rehappy
yawn..
sper tired,
no energy to post about games. so till later
[em]ily_ 11:06 PM
Friday, October 19
as i stared blankly into space. i prayed a silent prayer. it was the third time i was praying. the third time within less than 12 hours. but i guess it was worth it. cos the most impt reason why i prayed that prayeer, it was answered. my friends claimed that while they all made so much noise about advancing and promoting and the grades, i was so calm. was i really? my hands shook as i hesitated to open that message. my worry was overwhelming.just that it was all in me. just that cos i haf no right to express any of it.i openned the message. relief overwhelmed me. more than seeing my chinese results. more than anything i ever felt. and for once. i smiled.really sincerely. i never thought i was this badly affected by all of this. but apparently i am. but atleast, the glimmer of hope for you to pass just got more obvious. it should be ok. thats all that counts. but im not taking chances. im praying for your happiness every night..til wednesday comes. and once again i really hope dear God up there would listen to me, and grant me this one wish..as always. it always came with such a sacrifice.
im honestly thoroughly disappointed withmyself. but i know ppl will curse and sewar at me,so i shant say it here.just know that i din get an A for physics, i knew this would've happened. keep my hopes so high and let it go on a free fall.
thats how things are rite now. and i just haf to accept it.
ppl who saw me after that paper, though im disappointed in myself. all i haf to say is that i wasNT openly showing depression over my marks. i was pretty much...dunno what to say about it la. HOWEVER that frustration and sadness you could see inmy me.was just smth i couldnt let go anymore. cos once more i live in another life of just..empty words.
once again.thats just how lifes been anw. and i just haf to accept it again.
i dunno i just realised that though i obtained the justification i was looking for, at the same time, i also found some cold hard truths forced right into myface. and i struggled to gather all my strength to face it. the fact remains simply. how insignificant and detrimental i actually am to your life. i tink im a jinx to you honestly.look at how many times things screwed up for you when im around. now im gone. thinks seem to look on the better side. im sure that you no longer need me to help you with your studyies much either, cos the less i help the better you do. the useless tuition teacher who only gave you a b for humanities.the fact remains there. its no point contradicting. i was tinking alot. and i realised that this was true.so in the end i guess God answered my greatest need. for you to be happy. im not being sacarstic. im not being anything. im stating a fact. im happy you're happy. smtimes of cos i hate to accept the truth that it happens without me. but.at least youre happy. and that the fact that all this while, im pretty sure that i was just all that was in your way.
thats just a fact in life. ill accept it eventually.
sigh.
and again it all rounds down to a pure simple fact.
useless.
sighs. cant even help myself..i guess i shouldnt go around helping others...
ANW on a brighter note.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY JIAYING!~(:
today went out with sarah and sheree after school, hahaha quite fun after the retard thing htat happened at acsi and stupid amos.-.- then eventually we headed off missing our stop and tinking that we were on the correct bus alr, thank you for 111. our saviour. and fine thank you sheree.haha. and then we went and dropped off at lido for toilet break.hahaha. and then slowly walked down passing through wisma and taka, walking and talking until we reached ps, and searched for sarah lees ball.DUN TINK SICK. and after searching and falling in love with some daiso stuff. we went along to times, and bounced to bimbo shops for uhhmm. haha. i tink im quite proud of how its turning out.:D
lala then we had kfc for dinner, talked alot. wah kinda oily. i ordered my usual, what i used to order last time.almostordertwo shrug habit, dun worry il overcome it.haha. then we walked around somemore looked around. looked at vcds and all that stuff. sheree and sarah wants to dress me up one day..er.ok.sounds a wee bit scary. but oh well,if it makes yo both happy, haha i tink ill find it hilarious myself.hahahahaha.:D me dressed up. lol wat happened at prom, disaster.:D hahaha, this time. cant imagineee:D hee. ok im on, sounds fun.
meanwhile i tink ill return to not trying anymroe, and back to jeans and big "guys shirts." or my tees. skirts, gna get dusty. i tink i need to seek comfort in my self delusion again.back to good ole, quiet me, with still absolutely no taste in fashion.:D
the goodole emilypooi(:
all that change, not gna get back to it..
THANKS SARAH AND SHEREE FOR TODAY(:
and from tusadays with morrie i learn hiding my emotions is not the key. i tink mitch albom books rock, highly recommended to ya'all.(: reading is my key to escape(:
TMR IS TIME TO GET DIRTY!:D (ACBAND GAMES LA. sickos!~)
TOODLES!~
one day ill find the one who will truly be there for me..FOR REAL.
and he'll accompany throughout all my darkest trials.
and he'll relaly be the one who'll never leave me alone.
and its just not now.
and its ok.
but for now i tink i should stick to mugging books, and not pusuring more than the already sweet cmopany of all my dearest friends.cos friends are the best(: and if anything, i dun mind living this life with just friends by my side(: cos they are the oens who relaly will never leave me.
thanks all(:
[em]ily_ 9:17 PM
Thursday, October 18
IM SORRY I HAD TO EMO. DUN READ LA.
each nite when i go to sleep. i tink.andicry.
everytime i see your face.i rmb andicryagain.
everytime i haf a break.im hit by a sudden instinct andistop.
i was looking around while stonign at breaks, i see ppl i hear about. and i wonder how they could act like nothing happened.i wish i could figure out the way to forget and just move on,like you are insignificant in my life, as i am in yours.
hakim told me today taht im not being myself.
i guess hes rite.
cos all these months in acjc, you usually see a confident me. but now im just tired, withdrawn, lost.sigh.all my methods failed. i cant hate u no matter how hard i try. i cant forget no matter how i try. so all i haf left is to self condemn. and somehow tahts so obviously a even more screwed up way of doing things
but thats all i can do now.
gragh i hate this. and i hate myself.gragh.
anw if i din eat for dinner, which i had to cos if not my parents would've kille dm e, a few biscuit pieces, and three sips of water tonite. shrug. appettites screwed up. and i cant be bothered with the hunger pangs anw.haha.super bad appettite ill prob not eat at all if i was given the opportunuity to.
tmr. goodluck ppl, ill be rpaying for all of ya even when im not usually a praying sort. esp for you, so far, my praying hasnt not worked.
i sure hope it works again.
cos anw as always im always praying for you all, and im always using myself as the sacrifice in my prayers, so hopefully once again, all will be fine for all you all.
[em]ily_ 5:56 PM
Wednesday, October 17
frick.just forget.frick.icantdothis
just a dream i was awaken from.
i cant just tink of it that way.somehow...
[em]ily_ 11:03 PM
freak no motivation at all man.
freak can my brain stop rmbing things.
[em]ily_ 8:53 PM
no one ever mentioned the expiry date.
i guess even God's greatest gifts have expiry dates.haha.
shrug. IM NOT EMOING. im just in a shrug-ing heck carish mood.
why cant memories too have expiry dates?
then i wont be haunted anymore.
[em]ily_ 6:18 PM
shucks.
im supposed to be ok, i cant keep breaking down
[em]ily_ 9:25 AM
Tuesday, October 16
stupid zhan got me addicted. haha..
Someone Who Lives In Your Heart
All-4-One
Last night I dream that you were beside me
It seems so real that I cried andillkeepcrying
When you've touched me
You’re my angel
And you've given me wings
And I fly away with you wherever you go
Cause you filled my heart and you captured my soul iwishyoudin..
And baby i want you to know
CHORUS:
If there's one thing in this world that I know is true
It's the love that I feel when I'm thinking of you whymustistilltinkofyou
No ocean or mountain can keep us apart yeatheyouinolongerexisting
Coz no one can take away someone who lives in your heart yea..theimageandmemoriesthattheycant
All the hopes and the dreams are alive
I'll carry you with me through distance and time
Nothing in this world can keep us apart
Coz no one can take away someone who lives in your heart
And I know there's a million stars between us
But that won't stop my longing
To hold you and to kiss you
How I love you
And I'll find my way to you wherever you are evenifididyouwontcare
Coz you're in my soul and you've got my heart butiaintgotyours
And your love will carry me on wellyoudun
CHORUS:
If there's one thing in this world that I know is true
It's the love that I feel when I'm thinking of you
No ocean or mountain can keep us apart
Coz no one can take away someone who lives in your heart
All the hopes and the dreams are alive
I'll carry you with me through distance and time
Nothing in this world can keep us apart
Coz no one can take away someone who lives in your heart
Here in my arms,were you should be
Cause your love that makes me believe
That nothing or no one can tear us apart cause baby your in my heart
butimnotinyourssowat
CHORUS:
If there's one thing in this world that I know is true
It's the love that I feel when I'm thinking of you
No ocean or mountain can keep us apart
Coz no one can take away someone who lives in your heart
All the hopes and the dreams are alive
I'll carry you with me through distance and time
Nothing in this world can keep us apart
Coz no one can take away someone who lives in your heart
[em]ily_ 10:13 PM
Monday, October 15
just keep pretending.
and maybe one day ill be able to live somehow.
and then my feelings will turn from fake.to real.
and then it'll all be over.
just keep pretending
and it'll all be alrite.
[em]ily_ 11:21 PM
yesterday was not bad(: haha, met xy at 130 to go eat lunch before beautiful sunday, went to eat subway at marina, its biggg la!:D thanks for the card:D lala. then we went to esplanade in the hothot sun with my entire self peelinggggg (it still is-.-) then went in. ahhh i fell aslp cos i was super tired, and the bassbeats were so monotonous. im sed to music with sudden jerks in it. yawn.haha..
then after that xy and i went for icecream at haegen daaz. talked rubbish and feeling very tired, and i couldnt take i anymore cos the chocolate and whipped cream were so thick and everything.haha.
then samm came so we parted, met sam at starbucks and read some mags and talked here and there, then walked around the place and did a lil bit of shopping before finally! WARAKU:D:D:D:D wheeeee,
haha we bought erm, spaghetti bolognise THAT HAD AN EGG ON IT. erm pizza,katsu curry(mmmm:P) salad and soup came along part of the set, and sometempura set thingy:p. though we spent a bomb.mm it was like so worth it la!:D damn yummy:D heehee
then we walked around more, and talked alot la.hahaha.talktaltktalk shopshopshop.then eventually go homee sigh.hahaha.
yupyup thanks for the day sam and xy(:
my resolve lasted me two days, i haf to keep it going.andtherestgoesintolj
[em]ily_ 10:25 AM
Sunday, October 14
yesterday we had AMETTY fine dining as you can see from the above(highly colour adjusted photo)
bottom row from the left: jeremy(ingredient-chicken), yuhyiing(headchef n baker),amanda(corn crusher,fryer,blender etcetc), me(chopper and marinator).
top row from left: tim(masher,kitchen owner,peeler,etcetc), Michael(cleaner n baker)
the aim: Jeremys birthday(therefore ingredients were changed to jeremys comrades instead.)
The menu was:
Names were sponsored by amanda and yuhyiing, haha. so basically we met up at Coldstorage at chancery court at about 4 plus, and then we went around shopping praying that after all was done we still owuld have enough cash for it, we only had 45 bucks, and tadaaaaaa just nice we spent 44.59 bucks.hahahaha! (at thsi point we would like to emphasise taht michael was late.) and there was a scare charge due to the three dogs that freaked xiaomei outta her wits when she kept the trolley.. then we soon reached siges house and we started on our work while tim went to wash up after his mudbath at frisbee.ahah.
after alot of rubbish of cookking, me and the violence with the bloody(as in seriously it had blood all over) chickenwing and the mashing of potato and the HUGE AMOUNTS OF BUTTER. and hand crushed cornflakes.oops.ahah and all the otehr rubbish. with that stupid jeremy FORGETTING ABOUT THIS.-.- and michael finally coming.-.- but michael made it up with allll the washing which he couldnt bear to forgo with his manly pride-.-
our results!(:
Fruity chicken salad: fruit cocktail, apples,oranges youghurt and cabage and mixed veggies with diced chicken loads of corn and a hidden mickey! with the grapes.hahaha.i like!(:yummmmm. but dun ask me how i crushed the orangesss!hee
Jeremy baked in pie: shepherds pie, the most welldone work, amanda and tim had hard time with the mashingoof the potato, which eentualyl was thrown into the blender and wooahhh.hahaha. underneath diced chicken mixed veges onionsbutterand chicken broth sauce etc,loads of stuff. yummmmmmmm. superduper nice!:D
and of cos the most impt dish, Out-0f-your-ass: choclate cake,mmm baked by micahel,yy and amanda, niceeeee:D it had 34 candles all glowing prettyly
see! i posted it again, lol tehres one in the family blog alr.but oh wellll:D heh then we made both of them "cry", cos they were bothh touched:D
[em]ily_ 10:04 AM
Saturday, October 13
im not allowed to be emo here anymore. shucks, gna have to find another outlet, cos afterall. im so not risking all this shit man.afterbeingremindedabouthowmuchistillcareforhim but anw, today i wish to whine about the past 2 odd hours of my today cos it was super grrrrr. woke up at 8 plus, and was super damn tired cos my sun burn on my head and the bruise was hurting like shit.idreamtoftheringagnhownice.
yea, then i rushed off to school to pass the scores to someone, reached there school locked had to wait at main gate, it started raining was stuck out in the rain for a while without the umbrella feeling like damn tired and annoyed, then after all he finally came and lo and behold the stupid scores the wrong one which means ill haf to go back on monday again, wtf. and then i walked in that bloody storm to the bloody bustop and then freezing cold went jurong, and by instincts rushed for the bloody middle train when i sohuld be going to the print shop. rushed out of the train in time and when to the print shop and went home, and then when i reached home it started pouring just as soon as i was about to reach home, meaning i was still home. yea. freak la.
i itnk im def gna fall sick la. so sleepy.
hopefully the rest of today will be fine with jametty outing and stuff. i cant be f-ing emo even when i want to.wtf.
graggghhhh ill stop here or else i cant help but keep wanting to be emo! FREAKKKKKKK.
[em]ily_ 11:49 AM
Friday, October 12
ok i promise ill stop being emo ok?
pleasee. dun do it.
thanks for caring
but.. if you do that, you're only gna make me feel worse actually.
yup so please dun.thanks.
[em]ily_ 11:18 PM
hey ppl! i might be emo-y again, YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED.
anw, today was second games day, FLOORBALL CHAMPS.woot. not bad man:D haha, but aiya, din really help much, mirza,malcom,nicyin,sauchiu, martin they all la,haha...oh welll... but champs woot.haha..
mm really burnt la, the tan line sucks la. and its damn pain! and today when i went home some asshole acc punch me on my head with the sunburn la! WTH. i was like !@#$%^&* PAIN. wah crap im damn pain la , i tink this is like the worse burn so far la. wellphysicallyatleastmentalyivebeenthroughfarworse
hmm, then i left a bout 2 to go out with jeanette,sabo and liu. yay! haha ate at ajisen yumyum and caught up with good ole times.hahaha. lots of rubbish:p got sabo to use the chopsticks to pick up her FIRST prawn! HOORAH!:p hahha. then we went to the arcade, full of crap la! we were killing like idiots, of which i acc killed two innocent lifes la.hahaha. oops! haha then we played like the motorbike game, and the hammer game! WHACK LIKE DAMN HARD LA. and the baby game OMG damn tiring la!!!! AND DAMN RETARD LAAAAA. hahaha!! and basketballl!!!!!:D heeeheeee:D yupyup then we went to CC and then i had to rush off! sorry guys!(: thanks for today though!(:
hmm..sabo said that it was nice to have crappy emily than serious emily..haha, i guess maybe this facades not bad afterall, i should keep at it!haha..but i guess maybe it'll help me slowly push out everybit of thinking too much outta my head. and yea.hahaha
and to the idiots who think they can f-ing bully me rite. go to hell, jeanette sword can decapitate and disembowel. i dun think you're being cool. i tink you guyds are bloody bastards and i dun care about injuries now la. so if you tink you are adding salt to my wound. go f off.
but of cos many thanks t those who have been supporting me throughout these days, yup like gerdine,sam,xy,zhan, etcetc(: ill survive somehow.. without like turning to the wrong way.. yup
ben(og one.omgosh i know toomany bens) was telling me alotta crap la..stupid eediot.haha..well now you undesrtand wats actually going on, haha im sure he agrees with me that his initial proposal is totally off.haha..come back? hahaha.like it'd ever happen. im not being pessimistic. im bein realistic.
cant wait for tmrw.
meanwhiles need me burns, cuts, bruises and injured foot to recover.heh...
and of cos the pains of everyday..shucks.
anw i know he'll never read up la..i udn tink he relaly cares anymore, after all the shit ive put him through for the last threeplus days? haha. so i guess its prety safe to show the pictures of pon and zi which i adore so much without seeminy tooooo angsty,
http://www.ponandzi.com/image.php?img=9
just believe me, i just find it to be relaly sweet and adorable.it may resonate. but thats not the point. and if we're tlaking about relaly resonate, there are.millions of photos in there, where i can just glance, and cry. i would tell you the numbers. but i tink i said before rite?hahaha. oh well. laterrr...
before i become too emo
[em]ily_ 8:09 PM
Thursday, October 11
haha. i guess i really should stop emo-ing here, and just emo-ing to myself in my locked up livejournal.should spare you all from A HUGE LOADS of emo-ing in this blog..haha.but anw. ill talk about today, and leave out the bits i wish to forget. or the extra parts to anything i wish to forget, ill try my best.
but before i start. OMG IM SO FREAKING ASS RED LA. the tan line SUCKS LA. haha.. mm.lets see had stupid sex talk this morning. hmm. the stupid vid was damn annoying, and the rpesentor was honestly, DAMN SICK. oh my crap la.haha. then durint ct, lky was like asking me like what i thot about the video, so.. the only thing i could've thot of was. guy = jerk. well the one in the show at least.then she started going on about her opinions and how she actually feels that flirting is good for you, and how easy seduction is like what making a person feel special kinda thing. hahayeawatthecraplikesmthresonated. yea bloody hell. after that stoned at canteen.. was like so not hungry..no idea why.. then like after a while walk here and there passes amos the scores. and then go for games
first game got pangsehed.wth. of cos we played later cos they negotiated or smth, which iw as quite pissed over honestly.cos. of what happened later
of cos throughout the day, i was really like, damn useless la.haha. but the guys were super good, so we were wining all the way until like semis..hahaha.oh well.. tried our best. though i still felt horrible about the like blocking by accident, missing adn all that shit.
and of cos i meet some damn annoying idiots, one even made me lift up three fingers. not really high up la. just at my waist, if you dun get ti its ok, i guess i was just in a horribl mood today so all this just exacerbated all my annoyance, and so the three fingers went up.i really should stop being so vulgar.
but aiya.. i guess it was quite fun, only that i felt damn lousy. haha, and i din eat at all la. just drank like 2 cups of milo, 1 ribena bottle, and my cup of water, and now a large mash potato, and im nto finished with it and im full..shucks, im super screwed up.aha.
went home with sock, and like thanks sock from rescuing me from the motorbike, butsomehowiguessdyingsnotbad then like the stupid traffic lights at my house werent working, so i had to cross supercarefully, hmm.. iwishidiedtheretoo. and then now im home. ok yea, games were quite fun la...
hmm, but smth was tearing me up inside, so much so taht even with what sir said, i still couldnt cheer up.aha..oh bloody hell.
aiya wth la im so useless ive no idea why God lets me live.
and like im sorry, if you're super duper like angry at me and stuff, cos of all my moodswings and stuff. i guess i cant blame you cos i agree i dun make a hell lotta sense. and thats why i hate myself even more than i alr do. so i really wish you read this..but i just wanted to say im sorry, im so screwed up. please give me time to understand..
cos rite now i dun understand anything.
[em]ily_ 8:28 PM
Wednesday, October 10
one year ago, i was singing this too, and it somehow kept me going..so i hope with this, this year i can stay atrong too.but as i tink of this, pain just feels me up all over again. part of me just wants to go.. i cant do it anymore. i gifveup, bamboo pole kill me please. and part of me wants to keep going on for those who TRULY care for me.. i dunno how i did it, stay hyper, and ignore that comment, and ignore that company.but.. its no longer a matter of what really want, its more like, if i dun this i wont move on. and if i dun face it now, ill only face it later.
gawd sadly rite now, i fell more like dying.gawd, im so screwed up.i guess ill play ac games tmr after all...can i really move on?i dunno man. once more i feel emo.. and once more just ignore it. i guess there are more positive thisngs i said about today below. SLIGHTLY more positive only dun expect toouch, im nothing great...never was.. never will be. im just..haha..a screwed up uselese person..only pretending to be strong.. when im not.freak.ok soory. anw in the lyrics below, if you choose to read, the boxes are the eng translation, and the italics.are the emo part of me.. screaming my heart out... cos im freaking crying again.
Lifes like a boat[eng translation some aprts]
~Rie Fu~
Nobody knows who I really am
I never felt this empty before haha i feel it everyday wanna fight.
And if I ever need someone to come along,
Who's gonna comfort me, and keep me strong? i know i have friends, but the most impt one, never coming back la..haha.
We are all rowing the boat of fate
The waves keep on coming and we can't escape
But if we ever get lost on our way
The waves would guide you through another day yea how else to get through the day..
dooku de iki o shiteru toomei ni natta mitai[Far away, I'm breathing, as if I were transparent]
kudayami ni omoe dakedo mekaku shisarete tadake[It would seem I was in the dark, but I was only blindfolded]
inori o sasagete atarashii hi o matsu[I give a prayer as I wait for the new day]
asayaka ni hikaru umi sono hate made[Shining vividly up to the edge of that sea]
Nobody knows who I really am
Maybe they just don't give a damn
But if I ever need someone to come along
I know you would follow me, and keep me strong haha once upon a time.yea.now?haha.
hito no kokoro wa utsuriyuku mukedashiteku naru[People's hearts change and sneak away from them]
tsuki wa mada atarashii shuuki de mune o tsureteku[The moon in its new cycle leads the boats again]
And every time I see your face ill cry.
The ocean heaves up to my heart
You make me wanna strain at the oars, and soon to run away rite?
I can see the shore
Oh, I can see the shore
When will I see the shore?
I want you to know who I really am well i tried.. but now i dun want to be vulnerable to you evera again...
I never thought I'd feel this way towards you haha.yea.if only i dun feel this way.
And if you ever need someone to come along,
I will follow you, and keep you strong i guess..i still will..as..a friend..as you wish..
tabi wa mada tsuzuiteku odayakana hi mo[And still the journey continues on quiet days as well
]
tsuki wa mata atarashii shuuki de ume o terashidasu[The moon in its new cycle shines on the boats again]
inori o sasagete atarashii hi o matsu[I give a prayer as I wait for the new day]
asayaka ni hikaru umi sono hate made[Shining vividly up to the edge of that sea]
And every time I see your face
The ocean heaves up to my heart
You make me wanna strain at the oars, and soon
I can see the shore
Unmei no huneoko gi nami wa tsugi kara tsuki e to watashi-tachi o sou kedo[We are rowing the boat of fate, but the waves keep attacking us]
Sore mo suteki na tabi ne, dore mo suteki na tabi ne[But isn't that still a wonderful journey? Aren't any of them a wonderful journey?]
~well yea..all i long for..was just you, the company,the love,the care,the warm sense of strength and security i once felt.. haha, so i gave you everything, and asked you not to lose and break it...but...haha...what was i to expect..maybe what my friend said all this while was true..all this feelings...never stay real..haha...
[em]ily_ 6:16 PM
dun read this if you do. dun comment. cos i already told you not to read the blanked out words.that was such a wimpy thing to do. you call it off, and send ppl to antagonise me. wow. im so amazed by you now. thanks alot. you were a damn f-ing wimp and i swear i HATE what just happened. if thats how you're gna handle this situation, then you're a real loser. cos that was such a loser thing to do. i dunno about you, but im disgusted. and its starting to feel like, if thats how its gna be. i want you real far from me, even after ive recovered. cos it shows your true colours. and how frickin disgusting. you are. and how much more you actually lied to me. i was shocked. and wat shocked me more, was once again. it uncovered another fricking lie. you're really disgusting. though i hope tis not true. if taht was really what you set them up to do. i only haf ONE thing to say. friends? NEVER. though once again im praying and hoping that, i heard it all wrong. but truly. i was sure i heard rite. its all a matter of whose behind it, ad theres only one choice. and tahts YOU. and i swear, im super disguated, with you and THEM.
ive never felt so.PISSED off.
but no matter how pissed off i am, takecare pelase. you looked really pale today.i hope you're ok.yup.drink more water.
yes div i may seem so haha-and-high. but i swear its just a facade to prevent myself from trying to break everything else i see.
sry zhan din intend to break your back.
haha
ud asked me today, hey you celebrating this weekend! then i was like crap.oh yea. and i was like no.. and then i had to go through it all over again:( ah well. and the balloon thing at the hall was so fricking retarded.hahahahahaha! i miss the j2s alr:(
and i hate p double u.
oh well. but i guess. if you wish to destroy me as you choose, then f just go ahead, i dun care. i guess, after thinking alot.that yea, i dun even deserve another day of thought that i gave u once, and that i gave to someoneelse. so like he deciding everything in a few seconds. makes sense. im such a screwed up person. haha. hu would want a screwed up person, and other ppl dun come around making me feel better. cos its not true, cos i AM just really..screwed up.haha useless like shit.
and then again as i used to say. in life they keep throwing you shit and expecting you to turn it all into happiness, if you can keep up with the conversion pace. good for you. but hey,mores coming. if you cant, better hurry. mroe shits coming your way. its the survival of the fittest strongest and bravest. im none. im just a screwed up person. how nice.
en said over lunch today, (btw thanks en for accompanying me to dover) that it was better to live a short adn sweet lif, then a long bitter one.
bamboo pole kill me please.
liz and eugenes improvising skills damn cool, LIZ SEND ME YOUR IMPROVISED VERSION, GIVE ME FOR MY BIRTHDAY, ILL BE SATISFIED WITH JUST THAT.
:D:D
rolling and sleeping on the LTs stage was damn shioooookkkkk:D rollrollrollllll. DIZZY! hahahahaha!
yup i was spewing nonsesne to en when we went home, sorry! hahahaha.:p oh crap im so full of shit! no wonder i had to go shit today! hahaha! oh hell, TMR GNA SEE ROCHESTER(roasted nuts!) and get bitten by waffle again! who loveeees me soo much!awww hamster love is so PAINFUL.-.- haha, and going arcade to kill ppl wit jeanette,sabo and liu on fri.hahaha. i tink i should play vice soon. it'll cheer me up. in teh most sadistic way ever.
ahh, for now, ill stick with my blessings, adn that somehow God is letting me live no matter how useless i am..means maybe i haf some purpose now.. and i guess i should try to find that purpose. yup.
for now alto and music is LOVE.
toodles!~
[em]ily_ 4:56 PM
Tuesday, October 9
i hearda clarinet quart and brass quintet, they played nicenice, they played lil brown jug, i was happy. i erased the inerasable. and ill keep trying. cos soon ill stop adn realise theres a refresh button, and ill press it. and then gerdine and xy and samho will say.. ohhh so smart alr lor!:D
someone said smth funny to me again. they said i was strong, am i really? haha. i dun think so. haha. i just did..what i wanted to do, cos i thought it was right. but now i realised it is wrong. haha. so how smart and strong am i really?
ok i felt emo-y. after allim emi-ly!haha. dun read it if you dun like it.haha
Perhaps Love
by John Denver
Perhaps love is like a resting place, a shelter from the storm (ritteeeee)
It exists to give you comfort, it is there to keep you warm (f.really.)
And in those times of trouble when you are most alone (haha. like now?)
The memory of love will bring you home (will it really.)
Perhaps love is like a window, perhaps an open door (to leave rite)
It invites you to come closer, it wants to show you more (i wish i went far away instead)
And even if you lose yourself and don't know what to do (im lost in it, im struggling through/)
The memory of love will see you through (i tink its the otehr wayt round)
Love to some is like a cloud, to some as strong as steel (um how about. candyfloss, you eat ti, it disintegrates.)
For some a way of living, for some a way to feel (it was.)
And someone say love is holding on and some say letting go (how about. completely ignoring? ill try)
And some say love is everything, and some say they don't know (i really dunno anymore.. haha.)
Perhaps love is like the ocean, full of conflict, full of pain (haha, yea once you give u)
Like a fire when it's cold outside, thunder when it rains (ok that like contradicts, but i kinda get it!)
If I should live forever, and all my dreams come true (will it ever fulfill?)
My memories of love will be of you (for now, and not always.)
]
[em]ily_ 9:48 PM
Sunday, October 7
i was looking at pon and zi today. tanks sam that i finally found it
http://www.ponandzi.com/
hahaha. i almost started crying.
many of them resonated here. haha but they're so adorable youjust gt to see.
but im not posting them here, cos already the post below is angsty.
i dun want to make things worse.haha..
yea.butimissu
[em]ily_ 8:05 PM
please understand that i did not put this song here for the lyroics and that kinda stuff. its just to end what i started. thats it. approx 10 odd months ago. i put this up too. although it was obviously for an entirely completely reason. when i was filled with completely different emotions. well yea. this time. im putting this up. and ill never again hope to ever put it up. i intend to never feel this way ever again. im never ever ever gna turn back. i may feel pain. and i may cry. but time is never gna reverse. and i wont reverse it.things can never get back to how it used to be. and thats fine. its better than.. turning back anything and feeling pain again.im quite satisfied with the company of those who has accompanyied me. im quite satisfied with a life without you. im quite satisfied cos there are no more sacrifices thaqt ill ever have to make. there will be no more pain i haf to deal with nite by ntie.. there will be no more need to constantly worry about others anymore. im satisfied. cos then i will be indepedent. though ill take time to heal. and ill take time to stop crying.ill stop eventually.i dun need you in my life.you're just another brick in the wall to me. you arent anything. anymore significant anymore. thats what i aim for. thats what i intend to believe from now on wards. i ewant to be strong. i want to be independent. i want myself to be as happy as i was in sec3. when nth happened. i want things like they were when i was independent. i want to overcome this. i dun want you as my first priority in my life anymore.i dun want you as my lifes pivot anymore. ill be my own pivot.yea. thanks for all the encouragement.
and for those who are making sams life hard. just know its not a take sides thing? it was just an inevitable thing that happened. neither is to blame. only human emotions.haha. yea. so till later heres a song(: and back to my blood plus. i hope to finish it soon.
Bad Day
Daniel Powter
Where is the moment we needed the most
You kick up the leaves and the magic is lost
They tell me your blue skies fade to gray
They tell me your passion's gone away
And I don't need no carryin' on
You stand in the line just to hit a new low
You're faking a smile with the coffee you go
You tell me your life's been way off line
You're falling to pieces every time
And I don't need no carryin' on
Because you had a bad day
You're taking one down
You sing a sad song just to turn it around
You say you don't know
You tell me don't lie
You work at a smile and you go for a ride
You had a bad day
The camera don't lie
You're coming back down and you really don't mind
You had a bad day
You had a bad day
Will you need a blue sky holiday?
The point is they laugh at what you say
And I don't need no carryin' on
You had a bad day
You're taking one down
You sing a sad song just to turn it around
You say you don't know
You tell me don't lie
You work at a smile and you go for a ride
You had a bad day
The camera don't lie
You're coming back down and you really don't mind
You had a bad day(Oooh.. a holiday..)
Sometimes the system goes on the blink
And the whole thing turns out wrong
You might not make it back and you know
That you could be well oh that strong
And I'm not wrong(yeah...)
So where is the passion when you need it the most
Oh you and I
You kick up the leaves and the magic is lost
Cause you had a bad day
You're taking one down
You sing a sad song just to turn it around
You say you don't know
You tell me don't lie
You work at a smile and you go for a ride
You had a bad day
You've seen what you like
And how does it feel for one more time
You had a bad day
You had a bad day
[em]ily_ 11:21 AM
Saturday, October 6
im sorry. i still feel.. empty.
i wish i could be as positive as yesterday.
but yea..
if you read this.. dun keep feeling so bad..
cos. its inevitable.
[em]ily_ 10:32 AM
Friday, October 5
thanks to everyone who was there for me
cos the care you all showed for me, im really touched by it(:
and..
that made me stop wishing that i got hit by that killer litter on tuesday.:D haha.
in other words, i can move on now.
im still empty.
but.
im half full. not half empty(:
good nite(:
[em]ily_ 10:33 PM
Thursday, October 4
i swear.. this promos was a real killer la! haha. like see my record:
amount of caffeine drank per day: min 2 packets of coffee, max four.
number of days that i shed at least one tear, or felt like crying: everyday.
number of days i felt like giving up and retaining: everyday
number of times per days that i felt like a coward and just wanted to run away by killing myself:everyday.
number of days i actually sincerely laughed: im sure there were a few, but its so minor i cant rmb any.(note keyword is SINCERELY)
number of explicit words that i dun mean to use, but i accidentally use a day due to frustration: i dunno man, i tink my english deteroriated alot la.
number of days where i slept past 2-3: i tink it'll be easier to count how many i slept days that i slept before that.
i rmb i had a lnger checklist, but i cant pinpoint them rite now. shucks.haha. i seriously need to go out with jametty soon! and release all these crap stress, and my ex classmates, and yes just friends. (ifyoutakelityoucanreadintottwordinmorethanonewaynullberite)
anws tmr is stockcheck and maybe dept dinner(: so fun!:D lala. gargh bt the dustball concept will be bad, cos like my nose is like damn bad,haha. yea just nice fall sick this morning, till i couildnt like conc during the paper.haha, i used 3.5-4 packets of tissue during the paper! and like before the paper iw as like damn lousy and stuff, and i was sleeping at the bleachers.. haha, then like lucky qian came if not i would like go for the paper alone, and stuff haha. aiya my ex classmates are still the best to me.haha.:D lala NO INFLATED EGO ALLOWED.:D haha
mm..haha. but aiya it ended true enough. but aiya.crap la..i dun feel so brilliant. but aiya today quite fun went out with engloong,ian and sarah lee, went sakae, then sarah left early and then the three of us stoned and waited for kenneth koh to arrive.hahaha.mm belgian chocolate icecream! and i bought biscuits for tmr!(:
haha, alrites, im tired and on medication, and still haf stuff to prepare for tmr so off i shall go!:D
and maybe tmr ill feel better and finally realise that promos ARE over, and its to feel good.cosnwijustfeellikefingcrap
[em]ily_ 9:07 PM
Tuesday, October 2
oh yea.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY JOAN!
whos birthday is today:D i aggree with your friend about birthday presents adn physics, so sorry that it slipped my mind about your birthday:( but anw hope you had a great birthday all the same, sorry i couldnt go swensens!
and of cos
HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY XINYAN!
who's birthday was yesterday, that childrens day kid.haha.:D lalaa.tmrws we'll see!:D
[em]ily_ 5:10 PM
how to research when everythings unreliable!
gahh
3 more to go!
physics was..uhh... ok la, not good, not bad, chances of failing..er.. 51%49%.mmhmm.borderline.
history mugging is nuts, gtta start maths asap. @_@ gaahhhhhh
i seriously need to detox ASAP
all the coffee and late nites.
jiayoujiayou! to everybody hafing promos or other kinds of exams! JIAYOU(:
its just merely a fleeting moment of solitude.
[em]ily_ 4:35 PM
Sunday, September 30
GAHHHHHH. as of now, GAHHHHHHHHH
i tink like screweddddd! but. at least its just four more days. and then we haf like two spa papers, which though is like damn impt, but like the materials, arent too crazy.. phew..
but aiya.. i haf like a super bad feeling about promoting...
gp n cheena demoralised me. crap la. who falls into deep sleep in chinese with half her essay in squiggles. me-.-
oh bloody hell, so much to do so little time, but as always ngoeis notes actually make me laugh even if they make me sleep at 5 in the morning-.-
so gawd, lets just hope for the best, and prepare for the worse.
[em]ily_ 6:37 PM
Friday, September 28
i finally cracked a good joke, after so damn long!:D im o proud of myself. like JEANETTE I CRAKED A JOKE!!!!! depression and depression..hahaha.. but when she mentioned it..haha.. oh bloody helll..
mm..two down. four to go plus two practs to go..oh well..
haha, talking to qian, and ex sb8-ians haha, miss them so much..haha...oh well.anw, hmm..
dunno lah..
but anws, i realised ow much ive changed...isttwadlovedoestoyou
it isnt good.haha..
but oh well.. ill pull through..i hope.
screwed.
[em]ily_ 8:11 PM
Saturday, September 22
Haha, random song i heard on the radio today.. yup, brought back lots of memories..hahaha.. since like really little adn how the tv screening of its music vid would show, and i qwould squel in delight and stuff, haha, and my bro going crazee..haha. then of cos mass dance! good ole mass dance! i loved mass dance(: hahaha, gawed i miss orientation, theres nth better than it, i guess the seniors were right that it was the best days in jc life:P cos after that you deal with work, promos, exams, late nights, and pKb-.- and of cos getting your chem book stolen- so my bro claims... haha, i bought a new one alr..im too desperate..haha..
yup.. to the good ole days...coswhenyougettooclosetothefire,you'lprobgetburnt
Doing That Thing You Do
The Wonders
~
You doin' that thing you do
Breaking my heart into a million pieces like you always do
And you don't mean to be cruel
You never even knew about the heartache
I've been going through
Well I try and try to forget you girl
But it's just so hard to do
Every time you do that thing you do
I know all the games you play
And I'm gonna find a way to let you know that you'll be mine someday
Cause we could be happy can't you see
If you'd only let me be the one to hold you and keep you here with me
Cause I try and try to forget you girl
But it's just so hard to do
Every time you do that thing you do
I don't ask a lot girl
But I know one thing's for sure
It's the love I haven't got girl
And I just can't take it anymore
Cause we could be happy can't you see
If you'd only let me be the one to hold you and keep you here with me
Cause it hurts me so just to see you go
Around with someone new
And if I know you you're doing that thing
Every day just doing that thing
I can't take you doing that thing you do....
~
its too close.
[em]ily_ 3:57 PM
Wednesday, September 19
yd said that when one is stressed they tend to talk alot of bullshit.. SO TRUE.
this year not so this year too exhausted to say anything at all. buttttt, LAST YEAR, oh gosh i rmb the magnititude of crapi used to say, rite jeanette? haha.. i tink thats how i coped well last time, but like now dunno why cannot talk crap, i tink coa im really tired now. i tink i should just let "loose" and jst let myself talk bullshit and hopefully it'll help me feel better..hahaha
now currently TOO stressed, its reached single digit already!!!!! NINE days la! frickfrick. im likedamn screwed... goshgosh...
sometimes i really wish i couls just run away.
run farfar away from all the tears, fears and frustrations...
i guess its all up to me still to pull myself through.. positive thoughts would yield positive results...
JIAYOU
[em]ily_ 8:44 PM
Tuesday, September 18
its getting quite routine.
caffeine
headache
piles of work
stress
panic
and just plain
ARGHHHHHHHHHH
[em]ily_ 9:28 PM
Sunday, September 16
i guess i was naive to tink sleeping at 4 wont screw me up. haha..
stress.. ughh..
it was still seven hours!
12days:(
[em]ily_ 3:41 PM
Friday, September 14
day two. considering im not doing it on weekends, i must say, im really slack already, its only day two and seriously i dunno how you ppl do it.hahaha.
wrwrwr....makes me go@_@
hopefully i can finish it by 12 and start on hist mugging.. by 12 and hopefully get sleep by 1-2
yupyup, and i sure hope tmr turns out fruitful..lots of work, so little time, i need to in crease me efficiency.hahaha:D
mugmugmug. ok time to drink water, while the suns still down
WORK
[em]ily_ 9:55 PM
Wednesday, September 12
cold
cold medicine
drowsy
gp mock test
die.
[em]ily_ 1:02 PM
Monday, September 10
thank you very very very much(:
[em]ily_ 10:24 AM
Sunday, September 9
it was engloongs idea-.-
and the zw look-a-like so doesnt know music, and he like translates damn horribly. like talking about overtones that time, he talks about you all are not in harmony.doh. wah but clearing up was damn funny, and super tiring pleae..haha and since i din eat lunch iwas damn hungry
then like.haha we got to eat the leftovers.hahahaha. i was so hungry it din matter
and the chicken was really damn good.haha. yup then we climbed back into school. and left for home
damn tired now. hahaha. homework. so sian tmr schools gna start..gosh....seriously..what holiday? boo..ohwell..workwork...
[em]ily_ 8:38 PM
uugh feel a bit unwell. i tink it was from last nite..ugh.
but got course later, and im not missing it for anything, ill prob feel better as the day goes on, im sure i will. i can do it. im not sick im not falling sick im not falling sick im not falling sick.
so much work, i was too tired last nite to finish i fell aslp at 1230 instead of my initial ambitious plan of finishing everything and not sleeping..hahaha
oh well.later then..haha.but in the end i guess im being slowly pushed to giving up hopes on everything and anything, cos everything will eventually disappear anyway, one day or another, it doesnt matter when. its just going to. and as it slowly fades away, no matter how i tried to struggle... somehow it no longer seems like its gna help anymore... so ill just get up, dust the dirt off my ass, and walk away... im slowly pushed to walk..further..cos anw its already so so far away. so far far away, and after all my effort, its still impossible to close up the gap.cos its not smth i can do on my own,but im forced to.but i learn new things day by day, and soon, it'll destroy me. ignorance. it'll save me. ill leave it to you now.cos my heart says..icant do anything anymore..
[em]ily_ 10:12 AM
Saturday, September 8
i tink commanding here actually like works. NO MORE SOFAS IN THE LIBRARY. FINALLY.ifeellikeimpushingagainstthewall
ok today..was a weird day. but at least it trained my stamina? yupyup.hahaha but ryan was going like i hate pirates adn grease now la! hahaha. well we did play like damn alot of times,hahaha.the tunes like stuck in your head and its dam fricking annoying.haha.like ahhhhhh the tune just keeps repeating like siao.graghh.haahasomehowimstartingtofeelrelativelyredundant
hmm...but i guess it was ok la. i wont say it was terribl, it was just tiring.hahaha an experience all band members enjoy every batch once.hahaha.BUT WE SURVIVED. WE DID. i dunno how we did it but we did.hahaha. and manfreds the man la! daddy is that our mummy!(: heehee..and yupyup the sextet thing was quite cool(: hahaa if fary can blush one ah, omgosh i bet her face would've been red la.hahaha.sometimesidunnowhyimthereifeelunnecessary
yaya then went out with sam, NO I DUN LIKE THAT BAG, I DUN I DUN. and omogosh im so stupid can like i bought like hp pouches adn then i tink i din collect from the counter after paying.f.im so smart please.argh.iwas so excited can.then liie..wt the. gawd. im so stupid la seriously.maybeitsjustme...
and home i go..late nite tonite, early morning tmr..workwork...gogogo..
TWENTY.
[em]ily_ 10:01 PM
Friday, September 7
GET THOSE SOFAS OUT NOW.
you can leave the jackets behind.
PANICKING.
ahhhhhh...anw.. tmrws open house...i hope ill like somehow last tmrw..hahaha. its been a tiring week, and with my sudden hit realissation and chionging..im really super exhausted.haha. but not like my chionging is helping much actually ..hahaha..
one whole month without band anymore? omgosh...so weird please..im yet to record down, but after this break...gawd, its gna be nuts...im gna haf to chiongchiongchiong..haha it jtus never ends...oh well. work is work, and no matter how when you are entrusted with something, we should always do our best.
jiayous emily pooi!
jiayous everybody!
AND COME TMR IF YOU ARENT ALREADY. ITS OPEN HOUSE@ ACJC.9-330! BAND AT LT4, will haf like sextet and tuba duets at the foyer, go watch BOTH VERY COOL(:
COMECOMECOMEEEE!(:
TWENTY ONE.
omg.
[em]ily_ 9:47 PM
Thursday, September 6
i realised ive been SUPER inefficient and slack,ONCE again.
The last holidays i said at the end of the holidays that "its ok ill clear my files during the holidays!...." and realised that holidays end after the weekend.
-.-
two conclusions: my holidays are way not focused
and way not efficient.
gawd. how exactly am i gna BE efficient...-.- i got to work harder. i tink im damn screwed up rite now-.- with promos coming in TWENTY-TWO days. i tink im quite...dead. im panicking only NOW. say im dead? im dead. bang! die. yup somewat. like aiya, i honestly din study much this holiday, im so disappointed, at least, i guess im panicking now, and hopefully no shit comes up the next three weeks, cos thats what they promised, i finished the shit i was sup to do before promos already(thanks to my dear department, gerdine adn rachel, and of cos to other ppl.) i hope i wont get bugged til.... after promos. then i can rush that and library work. ugh been too pampered form secondary school, where multitasking wasnt much of a worry, furthermore somehow i could study in like the week before and cope, and pass-acceptably. as i said many times, now its not just about how hard i work anymore, cos i know i dun really work really hard UNTIL i panic(like now.) but even now im not at FULL THROTTLE. yet. like last year, i was crazy, kinda wish im like last year, in theat high state of tension, after all it somehow still allowed me to survive.
but gawd, im really so inefficient this hols, stupistupid me, so i haf to seriously buck up and the next three weeks gna be reather.. chionging. ill do it somehow, ive got no other worries on my listfor now. itink.
so... jaiyou to the last twenty-two days.
no stoning for a few weeks, ill elave it to after promos.
hahaha
and jiayou to everybody else, im sure you guys been working harder than me, but anws, take care of yourselves as you mug kk? drink loadsof water, and dun forget your vit c and try not to sleep too alte, unless you're rushing like me.hahaha ;)
yup! we're all in this tgt! and we're move on to next year as a batch!hhaha...
its not too hard to get started. cos guys, ITS TWENTY TOW MORE DAYS, that means...
528 hours. panicking yet? no? alrites that means like we only haf like31680 minutse. still not enough? 1900800 seconds. that seems alot? by tmr at this time, it'll be like1814400
well, if you're not panickingyet, emilypooi sure is.
haha.
mugmugmug. jiayou everybody, we'll make it TO and OUT of promos.(:
[em]ily_ 9:18 PM
Tuesday, September 4
YESTERDAY WAS GREAT(: i want photos!!!(:
firstly thanks sarah lee and fellow welfar-ians:D for organising it in the first place
and of cos to liz and her family for the place, and WONDERFUL FOOD(:
hahha, if i were stuart i would've done the exact same thing, so that i wont miss out on this!(: the food was really damn good la! hahaha. and the ship was like woahhh:D like it kept swaying..hahaha, so cool la.:D
history notes are driving me nuts, and i cant conc and study-.- im so screwed please:(
ughhhhhhi cant get dow to mugging:(
[em]ily_ 2:16 PM
Saturday, September 1
it takes a hundred kind words to get rid of the impact of one demoralising one.
gawd, i missed the time when i could just be garang, and like. do what i promised to do as a leader back then
a leader should never cry.
i need to..start again, i seriously need to stop hafing bad days, adn putting them aside and cheering myself up, seeing im the most reliable, cos i know myself the best, even tho i know my self so little alr..haha.
i guess.. its ok if i cry at home... but i tink i shouldnt be doing it at the freq that im doing now.
these few weeks haf been pretty yucky, and i feel kinda like horrible, disappointed in myself. and everything...
sucsk...
thanks to mama for this thingie which cheers me up a bit at least.haha.
shit, i seriously need to get back up on my feet.
and stop falling down.
[em]ily_ 9:44 PM
Friday, August 31
"Eh guys, our manliness is proportionate to the number of cards we have! " one year later, and we've grown one year older, i feel olderrr.hahaha.. sup to meet at 1230, we were all late! im like destined to be early, cos i was like 15mins late, but still earliest, again, one of the earlier few.hahaha. then sige came, followed by mama,erjie adn papa, laoda cabbed here soon later, and after a few intimidating smses to sange of "where are you! some where is not an answer!" and etcetct.hahaha he finally came by 115 i tink, so we rushed to pitstop, our dear beloeved shop!:D the woman from pitstop rmbs us! hahha cos we broke the cup.hahahahaha.and we're a bunch of idiotic retards.hahahaha. ok we started off with snorta! hahaha, omgosh retardedness revisited. witha ll the meehhhs, sss,wooff,mooo,hoot(toot?) oink, ribbit. hahaha, it was so retarded, papa lagged so badly, he usually like gave us warning, cos he cant figure out the sound . so he usually screwed up.hahahaha! so as usual he screwed up, with sige, hahaha.. oh well.hahaha:D then we played anotehr retarded game, called ugly monster, immense noise, screaming and all the rubbish! hahaha, mama acknowledged that im violent, and it was the game for the violent.HAHA. this game where we must haf the most cards to win, guess who got the least, papa. HAHA.he sucks:D we were like screaming uglyuglyuglyugly, at super fast rates! HAHAHA. then like snatching like nuts .hahahaha! okies then we had some more quiet game, considering that we had like some bunch of idiots expecting peace and quiet in a place like pitstop. RUBBISH. wrong place la losers! we played some truth or fib and apples to apples, which were more epaceful games, in a sense,(truth or fib din last long.hahaha.) but, its way too peaceful. soon later laoda left to run the omg shop, stupid papa! hahaha.(okok hes actually gone for csi, like right now.hahaha.) we then returned to a more interesting game of jurassic park.hahahaha, outright sabotage, the cheating pair of mama and xiaomei, then became, mama xiaomei, sige against erjie,sange adn papa. and after awhile mama betrayed us! and yea.haha! but it was such a fun game la! haha twotwotwotwotwtow~ oneoenoneoneoneoneone!! THREETHREETHREETHREE.hahaha!:D then we took photos, and left the palce.hahaha then we went off to boltero to take stupid pictures to create sensational news.HAHA. then finally we went home. lala, i bought a chippys original cheese sausage along the way, so much for saving money.-.- eternally broke. shit la.i itnnk maybe tmr i wont go eat dinner.haha. g diet.haha. haha, but oh gosh, i haf never laughed sososo much for sososos long,hahahaha.i guess tahts why they always say, "we're not friends,we're family" (: nothing can beat that.hahaha.(: never felt so able to feel at ease for so long, like can just throw aside all the rubbish of the day andlife, and just chill.. it felt so good.hahaha, just chiling, crapping, and aluhging, i laughed so hard my sides adn cheeks started to hurt, 6 pacs! hahahaha. oh well, but still im back to retarded reality, adn honestly, rite now i just want to bang the stupid retarded wall, im annoyed seriously. do you understnad? no is NOT an answer.(learning from scary mama:D) haha, photos are in our combined blog => http://arewemetty.blogspot.com/. Link at the side panel. evidences of our retardedness.hahaha. thanks alot guys, you all made this horrible day of mine a little bit better, as you guys do all the time.haha.so yup,ten thumbs up to our friendship!(: gdnite! 
there we were one year ago.haha PITSTOP.
and here we are again.hahahai HATE tmr already.
[em]ily_ 7:06 PM
Thursday, August 30
happy birthday nic ang!
that rat cartoonn thing which i cant spell the name(yes im noob) is pretty good.hahaha. you all should go watch:D
er yup.hahaha.taka department stall had a sale! hahaha.
yup alrites. good bye folks. back to work.
[em]ily_ 8:36 PM
Wednesday, August 29
i haf this feeling that im losing weight. cospplarestartingtonotseemeandwalkpastmeagain
dun worry im not being physically, if you're very smart you'll know, if you're smart you'll be able to find out, if you're stupid, then well you're probably the ones making me feel that way. sadly.
hhaha.. today was a relatively interesting trip to tekong.. tried their firing arms thing, so cool like in arcade please! like woah BANG woah! RECOIL. woah! okok i know im noob, making a big fuss over this, but woah. haha i passed man!:D haha the bunks had a terrile smell, and the rations were actually pretty ok la.hahaha, yupyup..and getting painted. sc looked like a monkey..hahaha.:D yupyup.. erm... went along home, yupyup.. ok i realised not much to say anymore.haha tmr teachers day celeb..haha. wtv it is,, my ultimate hope is that we would as a batch like play well to imprint a good impression on the ppl watcing us. oh welll...
my specs are screwed up again.haha. shit la.
[em]ily_ 9:43 PM
Saturday, August 25
today was a tiringgg day..hahaha, had like teachers day reh this morning, then like after that had sl traiing and then library/qm training.hahaha.super exhausting.hahaha, after all the rubbish went samsams house, first i was like struggling to rmb where her house was, then we went the wrong place.HAHA! my memory rocks.hahahaha.then played with waffle, sam's hamham, then like it bit me alotalot.hahaha yup liek it bites then i lift my finger and tis still clinging onto my finger with its teeth-.- got small red dots around my hand now.hahaha. then was like waiting for sam t bathe finish, then when she was done, we went offf, and had mango pudding.hahaha.then took bus to esplanade, adn met ben, like 1hr late-.-hahaha. then we went to marina to eat, we wanted to go some jap pasta place, where the food reallyreally looked tdamn good, but no time, and the place was super crowded so we went some ramen stall, which was not bad? like really authentic, the soup base was nice, but the sides..w.erent too good, very oily.
hahaha, yupyup, so much work to do meep! so little time! but ill do it somehow, by hook or by crook.hahaha. 34 more days! omgosh. im so panicking.
seeya!
[em]ily_ 10:31 PM
Friday, August 24
oh gawd, this weeked is crazy hmwk weekend. plus tmr! rehersal like at 7 plus, then trainingtrainingtraining. crazy..
stupid nicyin signed me up for soccer?! i can only rmb like kicking air in secondary school, and being goalie, but i wasnt of much good either way.id rather play badminton.but there isnt badminton! boooo. sadness.haha, yupyup, today played in the rain again.hhaha, im really hopeless lah.hahaha..
yupyup...one more day to add on to my list of wth days.
haha..
im trying imtrying i swear iam.
[em]ily_ 8:55 PM
Wednesday, August 22
here comes twenty chem questions, i like asked my bro to be free to help me on sunday.. thankfully its this weekend and not next when hes gna be away.phew.ill try to be positive about all this. since im screwing up these 20 questions will help me get my stuff rite, and like ya. but f la..i studied quite ok for this please.boo.
three days of torture. im so happy that next week ill only see that YKB face ONCE next week. the less the better.-.- here i am struggling to keep awake, and concentrate on my work. someone save me-.- i feel super duper exhausted.
booooooo. @_@ i feel incredibly zzzzzz
KENNETH KOH/ EDWIN:
I FOUND CHORALES CONDUCTOR SCORE.
rejoice!
okok back to history chemistry maths and physics.
toodles!~
[em]ily_ 8:25 PM
Tuesday, August 21
i may hate cats, but i promise ill really try to be more positive from now onwards.
mmhmm. i tink after buying those two notebooks, ive become like more persudaed to be positive. anw tmrs chem test is screwed. anddd...hmm.. cant wait for sectionals tmr, kinda haf lots of stuff to do:D and hmmm...
oh yea. er.yea, im screwed for chem tmr.haha.
i forgot wat i was gna say again. oh yea. im really serious this time, im so broke, i need to spend less on food.
hahaha.
yup im a glutton! ok back to mugging!
toodles!~
[em]ily_ 10:11 PM
Monday, August 20
hey all. heres starts the hectic mad rush to promos. desperation and everything-.- pure panic.
anyway todays anotehr retarded day in emilys retarded life. after the crazy amount of boring lectures, in which i actually managed to concentrate during physics lecture! haha and drawing on ryans hand during maths, and whacking nic after we went downstairs to buy stuff for physics lect. yup had lunch, finally.
AUNTY GAVE ME FREE STINGRAY!!!!!!:D omgosh aunty is so nice lah! hahahaha. but then like i din know that she was so willing to giver me the leftovers, like she purposelly din give nic all, but gave him like half and a fried egg, so that i can that little bit of stingray!:D omgosh! (ok im assuming here, but still.hahaha) then like ti was already add on to the fact i bought mano pudding and milo. alotta stuff, felt like a glutton.hahaha, but like the mango pudding was kinda bad.hahaha like...not pudding like.haha. then like, stupid nic yin. dropped a gummy bear into my asam stingray!!!!!0.0 i was like WTHHHHHH.*whack* haha.then like he also like wasted one gummy bear trying to prove the theory of the cartoon show last time"gummy bears" where the theme song says taht they bounce here there and everywhere-.- stupid nic yin
haha, then had gp ct, its ok i guess like a bit hard to find kinda thing? hahaha. then had chinese, was doing up my schedule,calms my nerves a bit.hahaha.
yawn im like kinda exhausted, i dunno why, i should be quite ok, had lots of sleep last ntie! oh welll.... tonites a long nite, need to do chem, and maths and gp, and stuff. hopefully ill get to start on my physics tutorial as well. so i can do chem and hist on tues/ wed instead.yupypu. jiayou... next week will be a slack week again. but unfortunately, i intedn to FINALLY start my intensive mugging, cos like nowadays all i can do is catch up with hmwk, no time for revision of my old chaps and stuff... hahaha. lucky that im okok with my current chaps so far, at least thats what my tests say. jiayou emily!
oh and i finally bought that BEAUTIFUL NOTEBOOKS.:D:D:D:D hee. alrites. i feel kinda broke now, gna go on a diet to save money for the rest of the week
toodles!~
[em]ily_ 6:57 PM
Sunday, August 19
how to not worry? haha.. shit laa... relaly need to relax here..hmm...work is not the problem..well it IS, but its like not really like, super big.haha... cos im just trying my hardest to catch up...somehow..haha.like kinda hard lah. like aiya. screwed up.haha.. dunno how to help myself:) but ill do it somehow...haha worryworryworry :x veryyy worriedd.....haiz.
worryworry.. ok im so overwhelmed with worry, and a horrid mood, i tink i should just distract myself with gp(irony?)
toodles!~menmyscreweduppersonality.
[em]ily_ 4:34 PM
Saturday, August 18
thick black bitter coffee..
just the bit that i needed to give me that little oof to work the night away...so much work to do so little time...haha.. somehow gna struggle through this night..boo, gna be pretty hard, but i guess, by hook or by crook ill do it... jiayouuu~~~-snores-haha, just kidding.:D
yawn.. anw, aiya, somethings, not worth saying. some things.... really just more worth to like.. i dunno.. aiya. stupid lah, i feel quite.. demoralised again..haha.....stupid me. i feel kinda like trodden on.. but somehow i haf to pick up and keep going, cos no matter what, i must do what i must do, and i mustnt let anything stop me from my job.yup, thanks anw(:
life can be really kinda cruel..haha, ok im kinda stressed out rite now, so i relaly should start work, and ya im kinda like....screwed.hahahaha:D and demoralised,lol. im starting to like be on better terms with this phone, just that my thumb really hurts, hahaha, the stupid keys.haha...
oh bloody hell stupid me...
GP PACKAGE. die!
toddles!~
[em]ily_ 9:41 PM
Friday, August 17
hey! i go twhacked by the ball again.-.- gosh pe has been like crazily rough. and playing netball in the rain was quite fun, only that my hair suffered:p got caught in the rain like 8 times today.hopefully i wont die of a flu
hahaha... stupid phone, ppl i kinda lost my contacts cos i really cant see shit on my phone now. and all the spare phones are shit
and yes ppl ive lost your contacts!
alrites. my moods so screwed up i forgot what i was gna type. so good bye ppl for now at least.
[em]ily_ 9:19 PM
Thursday, August 16
Look on te bright side! At least when you all made those wrong notes, ppl mistook it for modulation!:p
been a while since i cld come up with postable quotes, that are retarded-.- lala... past few days have been relatviely retarded and in a sense kinda...hmm... idunno theres been bad days..haha. quite a few. esp all those horrible late nites. ugh.tonites not gna be any better, im very sure of that...-.- the next weeks MADNESS i tell you...@_@ so many deadlines, tests, work!if i dun lose my brain im good.
booo, my glasses are still screwed.haha cos im not like, able to fix, and after SC like whacked me in the face with the ball... ooh, im seeing circles, and like.i dunno.hahaha....
oh gosh, so tired...
yawn, ok i better start work now.
toodles!~
[em]ily_ 9:20 PM
Monday, August 13
HEY. ok today was a relatively uninteresting day. maths was ok lah. but i intk there were a few careless mistakes? other than that it should be alrites. yup. boo. so tired. haha, i havent started the handbook and all that laa. hahaha...im sososo screwed.. but ill try my bestttt!:D to squeeze in time..... so much things..so little time.
haha today was quite funny in the sense like, this morning we all forgot that the j2s were not in sch today, so we went to like LT1 as always, and realised that OH SHIT its locked-.- and then shitshithist the bells ringing! we're screwed! and we ran down only to be locked out. haha but with persuasion from the guys, we managed to convince her not to give us DC! haha phewwwww. that was really damndamn lucky:p luckylucky.haha...
yawn so much work so little time, i think its cos i relaly wasted alot of time during m break? i tink i need to buck up, i need to improve my grades seriously. really need to see more consistency and stuff. need to jiayou! yuppers, workworkwork, i tink i can feel myself slowly become more motivated now!:D im so proud of myself.:D hee. i hope it lasts.. i must remain motivated.haha but boy this headache is killing me like shit laa. crap.haha...but oh gosh workworkwork. nevermind about the stupid headache it'll go soon. chinese test on wed and hist on thurs..gogoGO emily!:D
anw! im really proud of U. thanks for putting in so much effort now! thanks for trying so hard, and always going to study..thanks for it(: ive been reallyreally worried for you honestly. and now i feel veryvery proud of you, and your hardwork. jiayou kk! ill try my best to help you all the way too(:
okok, i shall do work! i feel so motivated now i should make use of this motivation and mug!:D
GOGOGO!!!!!!!!
toodles!~
em:D
[em]ily_ 7:58 PM
Sunday, August 12
nostalgia. hahaha listening to tracks and recordings from back then.hahaha. immensely precious memories.(: never will forget those memories man... they are wat that keep me going and pushing forward..somehow?:D
anw more nostalgia came from reading my past diaries... and then after LAST YEARS one, i realised that i should really buck up! cos like last year i was filled with optimism and no matter what hit me, ill grumble and whine, but ill never give in like i am now. so.. maybe i really shouldbuck up! i mean... lifes not all that.. bad lah... so i guess, though jc lifes harder than secondary school, i relaly should look to the good of life, band people, you, stingray. and thing that i owuld not enjoy if i wasnt in jc. i should buck up!(: heee. positiveness
but screw it lah like relaly stressed now. i haf no idea whats going on in this history chap lah... shit lahh..... and like i hafnt mugged much for maths test, and theres chinese hmwk that i hafnt done. adn i cant find the worksheet, and then gp, and then so much lahhh!!!!
oh wellll.. JIAYOU EMILY. i haf to do it somehow-.-
oh freak
goodluck to me:D
toodles!~
[em]ily_ 4:11 PM
Saturday, August 11
heya. grrgrrgrrrrrr.(sounds a bit like a car yea?) i WANT to MURDER that BASTARD. stupid.not listening.then later everything also dunno. everything also like that. i find it impossible to respect him for his strengths anymore. infact i tink hes immensely INTOLERABLE. he should just go and die..for being a typical useless...okok i should stop.
tdays class was a tiring day..haha...too much pizzaaaaa..hahaha ok im tired.need to get back to work..hahaha.too much other stuff on now.hahaha. need to get to other mugging work.hahahaha:D
[em]ily_ 8:13 PM
Thursday, August 9
"dun step on my white thread! or ill do smth to you!"
i tink thats like the only thing that i can rmb from stupid ndp reh and day.
HAPPY NATIONAL DAY anw...thanks for the holiday.
[em]ily_ 10:09 AM
Monday, August 6
ugh. i feel kinda lousy..like this badasss headache the whole day.. then like ive had no appetite the entire day. and i can tell that my bodys exhausted, but i go tlots to do tonite. workworkwork... so much work...booo.this is the week.
[em]ily_ 8:58 PM
Sunday, August 5
its just so fickle..one moment im high..one moment im low. it sucks lah.. my moodswinggs kill me like shit.-.- my phones dead btw. as in the screen is.. cant really see much shit on it. so yea, if i dun understand your message you konw why...ok no mood to continue now...haha...laterr thenn..
[em]ily_ 11:32 AM
Tuesday, July 31
im seriously crashing into a wall right now. and after this wall..if i actually overcome it. theres still many more to come. and honestly. im sick of it. im sick of crashing into wall after wall..and it never stops..it just never stops.. each time i meet one it drains of so much strength from me... i already cant convince myself to carry on,and yet eazch time i pick myself up and push on for just that one bit mroe. and then WHAM! i crash into another.are u sure this really is life? is this really wat im meant to live? i dun get it. all i know is that im so drained..my heart is empty... my brain is almost empty as well..a senseless robot... a mannequin with a face a bosy, yet no mind or heart of its own.
what the freak am i living for..what the freak am i here for.. i feel so sick of everything. cos basically now theres nothing. everythings just empty.
my dreams cant be fulfilled. my obligatiosn tear me apart. and honestly... its just all screwed up cock shit that i just want to decimate.
ive had enough.
[em]ily_ 10:41 PM
Monday, July 30
why the hell am i working so hard again?
for idiots like you?
is it really worth it? for my marks i guess it is.
bloody hell. why am i letting you all run over my head.
[em]ily_ 9:31 PM
Wednesday, July 25
those thoughts they keep replaying in my head..i suddenly rmb many things. things that teachers, friends people tell me...things that may have stopped me from missing my this chance. Thoughts that has been flooding my mind since..a few days ago... wake up call? maybe its about time i had one.haha.useless stupid me.hahaha. i cant believe i need such a big failure to wake me up and force me to face reality. and ya...
i guess.. in a way im lucky, cos at least its not smth super super major..in a sense...haha..but still an awful waste of money.and its all my fault.i could've saved up on fees of months to come, and the new examination fee. my gawd, i feel so useless..and so bad.
but then again, what does last minute practice..what did i intend for it to save? last minute work is always useless...i guess, i finally realise..and i am thankful, i found out now, and not ...when i reallyreally need to do well the most.
i have another chance. i dont want to screw up again. i cant fail again. i must reallyreallyreally work hard for this.and this time, its not a joke.its not something to whine about. its smth i need i must and i will do. even if i dread it, even if there are legitimate reasons to not do it. cos there will always be legitimate reasons...but if you let these legitimate reasons take over...you're just going to so screw yourself so much...its nto gonna help at all...
anw gosh i tink the security guard so sucks lah. like first when i came tp school, he almost refused to accept my verification for coming late.then fine he did, then i was walking inn with jef, and then jef asked to see that piece of paper, and thenthat bastard called me back demanding to know that that slip wasnt jefs! WTH i swear i wanted to kick him in the ass. and i had to take out my ezlink card just to prove to him. wtf lah. i mean like. hello? can you stop screwing my day.
and chem was nonsense, i could rmb nothing.oh great. i so need to work ahrder...
TEN more weeks....
thats all i haf left.
[em]ily_ 7:03 PM
Sunday, July 22
PIANO EXAMMMMM!
i was motivaed last nite(articulation), but it was kinda too late for me in the sense.. i still dun think im gna make it in tiem by wednesday..haha.i tink im quite screwed for it..hahaha. oh botehr....im improving, but its not fast enough and its my own fault for starting SO last minute... ive never pract so hard for so long! stupid me, maybe if ive worked harder, this would end earlier...haha.oh bloody hhell its all my fault for protracting this so called torture, somewat.haha.another few months with the puppet dance and ill lose more braincells than ever! i tink im going nuts with the third choice piece and scales...but i gues..if i really must, which i do, ill just continue on, and somehow pushing on more, even after somany years of just gritting my teeth and trdging through...i guess a few more months cant kill...(i bet it will but oh well.) all about perseverence, thats all i need to somehow...survive.haha. booo. maybe a miracle will occur and let me pass, maybe not.-.- hahaha. i fel quite abd cos im wasting my parents money. oh well...
wednesday.
kinda scary when i tink about it, cos im like playing like im sight reading..hahaha. isuck man...ahaha...
GP PACKAGEEEEE!
omgosh, im so dead can. hahaha im not annotating very well, but oh well theres stil like half more to go, and im going nuts already. hahha, my bad for not starting earlier(again!) but so much other work to do..hahaha hard to incorporate it into my schedule(yea excuses again.haha) nothings really going in either..sooo..hahaha. oh welllll...
oh boo i tink im falling sick, actually i dunno whether to be sad or wat, but i tink im gna fall sick but not sick enough to miss school and sometimes im reluctant to miss school cos of well work lah, and of cos to see my friends. hahaha but... grrrr. falling sick is annoying, and if im gna fall sick i want a day off to catch up with work(which ironically will be fall behind work too.-.-) haha. theres chem test next week, im not ready. there physics nextnext. im screwed.theres maths formula test next week, im so dead for that one too.. and haha. oh welll... theres the most major thing next week. PIANO EXAM :S and wthwthwth. im so dead. im so freaked out. and AHHHHHHHHH.hahaha.
oh well speech days next sat, cant wait for it.haha CAN SEE EVERYONE ELSE:D yay. and of cos yea. next week is like the week with THE day(: very important day!hahahaha. i still need two more things. money, and that thing. i dunno how to get that thing though. ughhhhh. oh welllllll, ill TRY MY BEST:D hee...
okkk i guess i should get around with gp package and mugging and doing homework asap. times tight, but not insufficient. still gna pract later! lala.
wish me luck!wyamialayssosardheiseplliehr
[em]ily_ 4:19 PM
Wednesday, July 18
adolescence or watever.
i cant stand it anymore.
but what i cant stand the most, is not just life and everything else.
its myself.i sometimes seriously wish i were dead.
and i just dun see the positvieness anymore...im losing touch..with myself, and everything else.
and im screwing up...so much.
and im sorry that this post sounds so emo and all that kinda rubbish?
but yea. im just not in the mood.
someone just shoot me..please.
[em]ily_ 11:03 PM
Sunday, July 15
FINISHED. finally the cip project is done. somehow its finished labelled touched up, all ready and stuff.. i hope.hahaha.close to the 24 hours of hard work.hahaha. and all of us went high on thinner yest after all the work.
we sun bathed on our hard work at the field, ate SO much for lunch.tried to revive smilie...digged into a gigantic earthquake! hAHA.yumm(: oh well as tedious and as annoyed i seemed to get, or as tired as i became after all that, i wouldnt NOIT do it if i was given the chance to redo my memory again.haha. it was quite fun, and teh memory from all our hardwork, is way too precious. ok its starting to sound cheesy. HAHA. but basically it was fun, and the satisfaction was great.
i dun regret the blue hands and thinner crazed days one bit, at least now lah:D hahaha. oh wellll...
on a more negative note, my grades, arent very pretty, i guess after mod for physics i so far passed everything, i dunno about hist yet tho.it looks ok, cos i passed everything? but i dun like it. its not pretty. promos in two months. im so screwed.hahaha. but, im going to make this one work. im so gonna make this one good. thats why im working so hard, and im not gna stop(:
in fact im gonna work harder.
cos no work, means no success..
lots to think about, lots to do. im not stopping now, if i stop now, im gna get trmpled on.
hahaha but thats the least of my worries...haha... theres more to think of and more to come.
friendship is all that is keeping me going.inferiority?
[em]ily_ 4:47 PM
Wednesday, July 11
politically correct.
what is?
by a stroke of luck. ive passed chinese.
someone tell me what to do!
[em]ily_ 10:33 PM
Monday, July 9
HAPPY BIRTHDAY MINGXUAN!!!!
MXFC DAY!!!
DUN WE ALL LOVE MX!:D
:D:D:D:D:D
lalala. orals screwed.and yes im damn tired. so much work to do.so no mood to do.
to change to livejournal or not to.
[em]ily_ 6:41 PM
Sunday, July 8
pissed. and theres no helping it.
[em]ily_ 1:25 PM
two things i want to destroy rite now.
phone and computer.
omh my phones reception so sucks. theres only reception in the kitchen. and the computer area. my rooms recpetion is so horrible! grrr.and tday guess what it refuses to work no matter where it is.the reception is so screwed.
and my computer is lagging like shit i want to delete like half of the unnecessary stuff in it. its like lagging like shit. grr.
i feel damn pissed
anw. yest was a relatively exhausting day. i just clocked up like 12 hours of cip hours yest.and i was in school...for like.14 hours? no i was not at acamp. i went to acsi first to get scores. that was at nine. then after that we got back sorted scores,then started with the work for cip. red was the colour of madness. black was the colour of sanity. then after that me,gerdine,enjia and jefri went to buy lunch for everybody.coming back, saw dr lee then found out he was coming over and rushed out back to buy food for him. then later cont with work, thanks to my dear library department who went to dover in my place to collect scores. then coloured red and did painting..
i guess im just demanding in my personality.but.oh welll.maybe its just me.i guess it cant be helped that im such a person...to a certain extent la.ohwell.sometimes..i just dun really agree with it and everything, and part of my hates my self from not stopping it.if i had, maybe we would've left earlier.oh bloody hell. i dunno whether to feel disappointmen, confusion, or wat. shrug. but after all that we were dying from the fumes, going nuts from the massive amounts of work and starving cos it wwas past 7 and we haf been wokrin our asses off and being really tired.we started our massive packup scheme.which took us close to three hours. scrubbing off the blue and yellow and watever rubbish on our skins with water, burning thinner and soap. and not all were successful, im still quite blue all over. and not to mention the cuts were got from the boards.
and yup we're still not done. looks like there goes my next sat and dinner too.
oh gosh.this is wat happens when you're ambitious as we were.
oh well..i admit i wasnt efficient.oh well..time to learn.haha
yup. workwork to do.
[em]ily_ 11:22 AM
Wednesday, July 4
its just the first day of school. and it sucks already. and everyone says its gonna get worse. which im sure it will.
the first lecture of the term and i fell asleep. thats such a brilliant start. i feel so proud of myself-.-
ok i shall start work.
anw papers are coming soon. im screwed.
farewell.
[em]ily_ 8:51 PM
Monday, July 2
boredom kills, makes me do tons of rubbish. just did scales on my alto. ew i sound pathetic. oh well. at least i brought it home to work on it. been working on my survey results coalition the entire afternoon up till now, and was printing out fun ensembles/duet scores for my beloved section. i tink they look quite fun, hopefully it'll help everyone improve, thats the most important now.haha.
gonna start on my eom soon. not much idea how to get around it. hmm... spa kills, i dun tink i can rmb anything. ergh.5% of my as...so sooon. im screwed lah.haha.practical.omgosh.practical.
my mum bought back durians for lunch today since my bro and dad werent around. hee. damn shiok, and its so gna screw up my throat which seems to be deteoriating. yup..hahaha but oh well its all worth it. mmm durians. lala. oh well for a boring day.. at least ive done quite alot of work, i kinda miss days like this normal days.. like theres nothing much to do just a bit of work that we work on, lots of time, that i could waste watching youtube, though i haf no idea way to watch, or i could spend it on random posts of rubbish, or doing quizes or trying to work on a new blogksin. i love days like this when i dun haf to worry, and i can just keep quiet the entire day, and just fill the day up with myself. and my own pure enjoyment. im putting library work aside. and most of my hmwk, just stuff i FEEL like doing. like sorting out info, and finding fun scores,and freezing my lips with ice making them numb due to subzero icewater:D i love afternoons where i can just sleep and sleep and sleep all day. or times when i can roll about in my bed and not bother about a thing.
i tink it was called a BREAk. but oh well, its not the super good breaks i lovem butits pretty good enough for me so far. theres still some work to do, eom draft, practing my scales, my alto and my piano, reading more in my SPA..hahaha, but its ok i tink, its not that demanding, i dun feel the pressures rising up to my ears. of cos theres lots of work to do. but not now. not today. not this moment.
i want to make a blogksin, but i need immense inspiration. hahaha. i need something more coloured. and more...pretty and stuff.for a while.i need to make a new one. I WANT TO MAKE A NEW ONE.oh well somehow.
till the next random post of boredom
zhiwen daddys face was so red you could see it in the dark!:D
[em]ily_ 3:42 PM
i want a new blogskin! RAWR. tmrw is spa...booo..its so rubbish can.. im quite screwed for it...ill just make do with my report somehow.hahaha. boo... oh welll...
ive been thinking alot recently... and wondering alot... i mean, the j2s have left....im kinda worried...music-wise... but thenn...only with the toughest obstacles, will we become the strongest that we can be...i really hope it turns out that way.i relaly want to show others that our batch can make things happen...i relaly want to prove our batch worth. and i really just want to get back to making music... i dunno lah.. rite now i can only believe everyone..and hope for the best. its a shaky start..but its one never the less..and whether we want it or not. we have tog et thorugh it.thats all there is to it.
the tougher the obstacle, the stronger we become.
and we can become something.
we will.(:
[em]ily_ 10:34 AM
Friday, June 29
OVER.
i tink im getting attached to one word short posts now.haha!
[em]ily_ 10:04 PM
Sunday, June 24
requested
AMAH.
ok like quite nice word lah. :P
after hearing tons of spoilers. im sad!:(
and then again, smth interesting! ITACHI IS GETTING COOLER AND COOLER. i regret cursing him last time.:D
oh well. terms statrt tmr.-.-
faster start faster end.
but still. aiya. DIE LAH.
[em]ily_ 6:50 PM
sometimes when you dun feel like blogging..just one word is all you need.
RARH.
[em]ily_ 10:00 AM
Thursday, June 21
hey all... yesterday..was another ntie to rmb... i guesss...somehow no matter how screwedup we play.. i believe we MUST rmb it. because...i guess it should serve as a reminder to ourselves on how we should be lworking for our end of the year, our national perf etcetc...afterall if smth ais as impt as this to us all.. iguess...it should be taken seriously enough....maybe for some that was our mistake, maybe for others the lack of time, maybe also it was the problem of time management?i dunno... i know i din pract hard enough ands tuff...so i know..its my fault and not others..for my own personal responsibility...i tink i screwe up on that part..haha..i dunno...but i believe so.
and i guess it IS a curse to always forget the baton..but i feel quite ohrrible now? yea...i screwed up alot admin-wise the entire day. i feel quite shit now? but ohwell..no point feeling shit the whole day and not finding ways to improve..hm..erm..well..yea.haha...this concert was quite screwed.i din really do justice to my bros song....i was so freaking out of tune.andi screwed up so bloody much!=( oh bloody hell...
my long low F solo...freak. i couldnt hold! FREAK. its just a bloody long note. my keys get stuck on me.my keys refused to work. my low notes suddenly din want to play! omgosh.,i screwed up the soli parts.and faster. omgosh. i feel quite shit now? oh fricking hell.. the more i tink about it the more upset i get.but as i said earlier.. i guess its just a waste of time.to be upset. without constructive ideas on how to improve.
going to collect LOTR from nus today. shit lah. i dunno how im gna get blue horizon nad paganini. im quite scared.argh. i need to get my bro to bring me to that amk shop soon. like SOON. that means during terms. frick if only this was secondary schooll. i can still juggle all that, and pass my papers.now even if i work hard, which im not, i wont guarantee passing at all.so how. i dunno. i tink im quite dead. but hten again, i dunno.heck lah.shtishitshit. i just had to say that sorry.
im even sadder cos i forgot my cam yest? and i feel bad for not writing a note to everybody.i feel sad. but argh.i miss everybody already.. reading notes yest made me more stone than i alr was.haha. oh welll. thanks for all the nice smses from everyone, but we din relaly play that well.haha.oh well.shrug. i guess i sohuld stop tinking about it.oh well.
we all made the same mistake again.
is it really worth making another one?
since its already happened...
lets just make that the last..
please?
for the band we all love so much.
lets stop creating avenuse for regret.
[em]ily_ 11:09 AM
Tuesday, June 19
TMR. tmr is a bigbigBIG day.... though it feels like we are so not ready for it... i guess as zhiwen says, its all about focusing now. thats all we need now. concentration. maybe thats what we basically lack all this while? so if only we jut concentrated tmr... maybe..just maybe it'll all turn out alrite!..hahaha. thats what i hope for, as the vast majority would too i believe.haha..after all...acjc band...is where all our memories are..where all our greatest friends are..where all our efforts are spent...we've always worked so hard.. and spent so much time, effort, sweat,tears...all poured into this band. everyone, and anyone would've wanted the best, so i believe. as long as they had put in the effort, i think that is ultimately wat we ALL want. as a band, as a proud musician, of acjc band.for dr lee,for ourselves,for the school, for our alumni,our future juniors, our successors.
TO ALL SOLOISTS!:D TMRS YOUR BIG BREAK! as dr lee always say, make ppl out there not just let your solo pass, and actually go like OMG that soloist is so power! kinda thing? let all the horn/flues/piccolo/altoflute/trumpet/trombone/ bassoon/oboe..ETCETC noobs out there watching us tmr nite... know what music and the instruments ALL ABOUT.(: you all can do it! i mean especially if you've been working so hard, it'll all be fine. just play your hearts out. and make music...make your mark in acjc band, you haf the chance...dun let it be a passing solo... let it be one to remember! YOU ALL CAN DO IT!!!!!:D SOOOOOO JIAYOU!
TO MY DEAR BELOVED SECTION(:(if you all even read this.HAHA.) relax kk! we may be almost all girls, but that doesnt mean we're any less better than guys!:D we rock! especially cass and jy RELAX. your solos will be fine. your parts will be ok! just play out!:D your section is behind you both all the way. show those noobs out there, that even though you've just started, you're still ebtter than the rest!(: to bize! SL! JIAYOU FOR ALL YOUR SOLOS! just relax kk !! its high, butttt. CAN LAH. my sl so pro sure can one!!!hahaha. (:(: to sb., JIAYOU FOR YOUR SOLOS TO. watch dr lee kk! keep your rhytmn in tact, then sure can one! jiayou ya!! to the bass clarinets! WATCH OUR TUNING AND CONCENTRATE. and breatheeeeee!!!! and then there'll be no worries at alllll!!!:D jiayou we rock! three bassclaients, we WILL be heard, and yet not destroy the balance of the band:D
TO THE FLUTE SOLOIST ESPECIALLY. LETS HEAR THOSE RUBATO! (that was meant to be an extremely random comment) JASMINE! SMALL IS POWER! GERDINE!!!! YOU CAN DO IT!!!!!!! you've worked so hard!sure can!!!!(: xinyan! JUST PLAY. anyone would melt:D hahaha.
TO YOU. RELAX!!!! YOUR SOLO WILL BE FINE TMR> DUN OVERWORK YOURSELF TMR. i know its all scary like rite now and stuff, but ill be here to support you! and so will your entire section and the entire band. everyones here for you. we're all in this together! just play your heart out! and all will be fine!!!(: cos i said so!(:just relax. calm down. and play! you can surely do it!:D REST EARLY TONITE. you're not alone kk? CONFIDENCE.
TO THE CLARINET ENSEMBLE. WE ROCK.. LETS PLAY OUR BEST. and justify my bros arrangment!!! ya....(: yay. breatheee. and start together.yay. i hope i can feel my pulse:( hahaha. alrites!! lets jiayou...
TO THE BAND. everything i worte, and... DRINK WATER. REST EARLY. and lets play music and win dr lees confidence back, with tthis first step ok!:D WE ARE ACBAND. WE CAN DO IT. (ok that sounded cliche) but neverthe less its through rest early, eat well, drink up, pee before concert. HAHA.:D takecares. our last push to it all!
tmr is dday! JIAYOU!(:
[em]ily_ 8:44 PM
Sunday, June 17
hey. band camps over! im damn shag, cant imagine how the exco are.but they haf their rest til prep for concert starts, so GOOD JOB EXCO:D and rest well guys!(: think you guys did great. for the start at least. and great job tune in comm!(:games comm! admin comm! souveniers comm!(:i tink everyone did their part to their best abilities. so thats why i tink it was a form of success in someway.and so yea. good job.(:
yawn, but gosh im so exhausted already.i guess cos im involved in an ensem so i had pract no break at all.shrug.haha. but yea little sleep, poor meals(cos i hardly had time to eat, or appetite for that matter) and the horrible pms.i guess it made me really moody here nad there, so apologies for that. but certain events and really stuck in my mind in the sense that i feel damn horrible for it still.not my fault? but it still feels that way.
day1, i woke up in the morning at 6 plus. *screams* it came two weeks early. went to school damn early cos was too lazy to take public transport with bags as heavy as me. martins haircut was quite cool.hahaha. dr leemade him cut it.lol. and he din bring his gel tsk. :D practise was ok.. din go for lunch cos wasnt feeling too good.was feeling really lousy and stuff for the entire day.had ensemb pract afterthe entire day of pract at 9 smth?(dinner was in school in the sense i was eating wat my sect brought back for me for lunch) oh andduring dinner was watchin the guys play soccer cos i was really damn bored.haha. after ensemb rushed to bathe.ate a short quick supper.of diluted milo-.-im bad at that, and wento back to sleep after tryin to find scores for my bro.but couldnt sleep well, cos was at the door, everytime someone came in and stuff, ill wake up. and all the talking woke me up. so i hardly slept. on top of that i went to 2.1 to mug a bit to make me sleepier.din relaly work. but the scs were still uip doing their score work. was quite amazed. but all the same jiayou.
day2, woke up early helped with the breakfast. then got back and tickled sam and elizabeth awake.and after all that ate breakfast,and went for practice.lunch went with bz and sheree,and shaheera.the rest of my sect went to gelare or smth, and cass went to get stuff for supper and stuff.ate bk then went back toschool for pract.then had ensemb pract.i felt quite horrible. cos my kors disappointment..i know its not my fault that not everyone was there.but somewhat..i felt that...it was my fault all the same..i dunno. i just know he wanted this so much...and thjen when no one cared..or seem to care,a dnwe hafnt had a proper ensem pract, with full atrtendence,and not even ran through the song once for practise.and the one we did for aud really screwed up. and i was alr in quite a bad mood,and i couldnt even play properly..it felt like shit. i felt like..yea..i dunno lah. i dunw ant to talk about nite games,i appreciate the effort on the exco part.but. im not a nite person for a reason.
day3, woke up damn early considering last nite ihad less than 3 hours of sleep or smth..i did it somehow anw..so yea.rushed to pack..ate breakfast with xy. and grabbed smth for gerdine, who was really busy that day. helped in chasing people up, and with registration, then helped to mix around with ppl.talked to some of the sec fours.then soon tune in started proper, the video was quite funny.then went off for games, soaked jy to the skin, haha sabo bingjian nad nazreen.hahaha.then went to play the money game.i pangsehed my last number. but then again i did my forfeit with them as well.haha.then played the sweet game which was kinda funny.hahaha.pity it all had to rain.if not it'll be so much more fun lah.haha. my group was kinda fun cos everyone made an effort to make games fun nad they were all pretty enthu:D haha.then after that had sectionals. where i got relaly shocked, when ppl started telling me that i had THREE BASSCLARINETS AND THREE BASSOONS, AND TWO OBOES?! iw as like..er.. my sectino...isnt sup to be that big.hahaha. it was damn weird taking such a gigantic section...haha bt nevertheless. sectionals is sectionals. i was forced to conduct.which i cant anws..but i tried my best all the same.then lunch. went to subway.i went to top up my card first, then it started pouring like shit.i was like shitshitshit.haha.rshed to the busstop and was soake dto the skin. and thenwent toff to hv. saw my very wet section.haha.ate and talked to the sec4s. nice ppl.reminded of nco camp. sherri actually had the same bassclar falling apart experince as me.LOL.ok then after that rushed back agani. raingin like shit again.got clean clothes for my juniors. everyone of us changed nad stuff.tune in started. talked alot ot sherri. then had to rush to get scheherezarde 4th mvtment.doh.quite funny.then after that when all was over. cleared up.carried chairs back settles instruemnts return. and packed up scores. oh but intro during tune in was quite funny how he made fun of pris.he spared me and jef.LOL.erm yea went to eat with jef. and then i oculd predict his everymove-.- you ah. but wahlao was damn shag. came home talked to sam awhile,unpack stoned.and fell aslp.hahathat was at 10.
today.woke up at 11. felt much better. but still feel kinda bad cos i forgot to make the card.
and i still feel sad over teh ensem thing, just tha tits not buggin me as much.and its just a lil bit.
ppl time is yours to manage, if others can do it...why cant you? priorities is yours to settle.sometimes..when "bigger" responsiblities appear people tend to forget how impt the smaller ones are..and then you cant juggle anymore.
3 more days. less than that.
i feel quite worried. im really.not prepared.
are you?
[em]ily_ 12:15 PM
Wednesday, June 13
boo..the days getting horrible-er and horrible-er by the event.theres some much i want to do so little time, and then theres the issue about tickets..no ones paid me yet..BOOO:(how to part with 90 bucks tmr...sobs..and three still pending...no one else wants togo..
ppl go for musee PLEASEEEEEEEEEEEE....
piano was like shti as always-.- im dead for exams...
camps tmr...hope everything goes rite esp tune in, may we haf sufficient scores.(i fear..) i still dun understand how my bags always SO bulky no matter how i try to pack it-.-and theres no time to mug.. so im dead for terms. emilys screwed for terms. if only the syllabus was like in sec school.... ill survive somehow.but terms...aiya screw lah.
ok i better get back to muggin now and stop wasting anymore time i haf left..yup.
count down to death date
if i dun die in the one week.i die in one week nad a half.
only one mroe week left..
only one week and a half left..sould've listened to pb abt never hafing a holiday.-.-i shouldve mugged harder alongthe way..and not slept last nite.UGH.
deaddeaddeaddead
[em]ily_ 5:59 PM
Sunday, June 10
haha, tmrs project dust-no-more, i actually cant wait! i hop all goes smoothly, and we can complete stuff! hahaha, must go buy some stuff today to brighten up the hidden library especially...hahaha.the dusty old place with lizard eggs, and the donation of HALF a photocopying machine from the aunty-.- hahaha, ill try my best to keep them all nice nad tidy.
btw incase you other humans hafnt realised, if you leave your stuff on the library table, i stuff it into the fridge or other places.put it there,with your own risks. if you want frozen shoes or smth then go ahead.
graghhhh.. i cant do chinese hmwk i haf no idea what the task requirements are asking for(shows how much my cheena has deproved)
oh well at least i tidied up my files, and now im more motivated to study, well, a little bit more. and with two more weeks to go ONLY. not to forget the prescence of band camp and concert, im screwed. but ill do what i can from now onlwards. cos anws im quite screwed. haha. well im rushing my hmwk at teh very least.wish me luck im gna need it.im damnscrewed.
muse is coming...
n im sorry im on the pessimistic side, but thanks anw ppl.haha.
[em]ily_ 11:35 AM
Thursday, June 7
haha...dejavu... shit.. i told myself.. that this time i wont revisit the past.the mistakes from the past...i just cant let it happen again.i have an even..more important..people to honour..more are depending ..i want..
haiz im notmaking much sense... its like so restrained typing here. i dun want to say it..yet i want to say it..yet..oh well...
all i know. is i din go into that post, to risk the least damage.but seems like..nothings going right. i cant do it right..hahaha i tink my personality is too weak.id unno. i just know im demoralised... but then i guess its just my fault... cos haha. its my own incapabilities thats screwing things up...
i guess i reallyreally gotta work on my weakness..and conquer it...
the price is too steep.
i cant run away anymore.. but i dunno..how.
2 more weeks. are we even barely ready? i dunno...
[em]ily_ 8:48 PM
Wednesday, May 30
yes mx your bag makes your ass look bigger!:D
haha.. alot of farni things hpapening these days... dunno which to believe..i guess if i chose my usual path, i would run away.n believe neither. but i know i cant possibly run away.so ill figure it out. or at least ill try, even if i die from it which i hope i wont.iwishidinexistiwishiwasntaroundcos
iknowimnotsuperimptandicantpossiblyaffectpplmuch
butifidinexistppliknowwonthaftosufferasgreatlytheressomuchtrpiblenow
niknowitsmethatstherootofallproblemiwishiwasdeadibringmorepainthanhappinesswhythenshouldiexistandtormentpplsoiwishidinexistneveryoneelsewouldbhappier
anw physics kills. im so behind my work, but yes ive finally continued my belach.hohoho. nice stuff i must say.hahaha. :D anw thanks for all those who did my survey though majority of them i haf no idea who you all are. but thanks anw. :D
so basically class a summary would be:
physics kills
and mx has a big butt:D
WHENS MX BURFDAY. I WANNA GET SMTH RETARDED FOR HIM:D
[em]ily_ 2:23 PM
Monday, May 28
my mummy found this frame with my baby photos in it. i realise how ugly i got as i grew older.
anw now my stomach hurts like shit now.the toilet doesnt help. theheadache kills too.
and im thankful that i got persuaded by sige to watch bleach. wheeee. quite fun.ahahaha.
im quite tired. and theres lots of work to do. i know i haf to start. but its hard. and im still angry at myself for not practing...:(
alrites back to bleach and physics.
laterr
[em]ily_ 9:39 PM
Sunday, May 27
boo. the wooden thing was suppose to relieve me of stress, but when it broke down like for the third time. into all the tiny pieces. i got more frustrated than ever and back came the headache.
-.-
next week sounds sucky... oh well.. and...haiz i dunno lah. restless was ok. godwin looked retard as always:D and hakim was a s hakim.hahaha. pity sharons not around anymore. shes super good lah...SHAROOONNNNN.haha..
boo. im super screwed up. oh well.
stupid me.
ok i lost all mood to talk anymore. but ill update soon again
should be getting new template soon.
ok no more mood seriously.
ppl go for muse ok!(: details at the side bar. seeya around!(:
[em]ily_ 6:58 PM
Wednesday, May 23
heylllooooo
im reaching the point of kaaboom.
i cant stand the mockery anymore, im done with the isolation. i dun want to carea nymore. honestly.wth. leave me alone. i rather live alone then get mocked by you all. i rather sit with other ppl, or even by myself. than sit with you all. im done. enough.
i honestly really hate it and have enough of this crap.enoughenoughenough.
my personal profile says im whiny. and yes i am. if being nice is wrong, if being friends is wrong. then what else is there to do. what else should i be. nothing. some evil person isit? some self centred idiot?
i cant.
and as in sufferable as it is. forget it. you are you, i am myself.im not gna change for yo u .
without idiots like you im fine
[em]ily_ 1:29 PM
Monday, May 14
insecurity.
maybe if i was more introverted to the extent that nothing affected me of any sort, relationships with humans, friendships and everything else, wouldnt matter to me. i can tolerate loneliness and live my life alone. if only i was more introverted.
or maybe
if only i had really choked on my food today, and that pain in the chest din go away, and i really died from it. the world would've been a better place.
then again. i geuss im running away again. as i always do. i runrunrun run away as far as possible from all my troubles. turn to make believe fantasies and fairytales, of the past. to let the pain pass... but then again, thats the only way my brain can register to say that ive overcome this hurdle.otherwise, it would never register myself to have truly overcome this hardship.
one stroke difference in the name could make such a difference. 1st 3 months was more like a dream come true. and now its like a dream turned nightmare.when you are now hated for supposedly being nice, while you used to be accepted for just being u. a dream turned nitemare. i just want it to end. i guess changes in life is unavoidable.
and the end has to come for everything. like nco. like secondary school. like a slack life.
i thought that last time these people were worse. now i face anewer group worse..and probably..the life of the next two years ill live.
anw todays a bad day. my hair keeps screwing up, im so tired, i couldnt finish my maths, i nearly choked, i nearly sprained my ankle, i got suaned by my gp teacher just cos i watched the movie she wants to show us tmr, my words were forgotten, workloads huge. etc
life is great. ya i can so see that.
going back crescent tmr. how fun. hope you juniors are doing fine, evil emily is going back(:
[em]ily_ 7:03 PM
Saturday, May 12
Note by note, bar by bar,
Its been so long, we've come so far.
From strangers to family, its taken us a while,
Take each other hand-in-hand and lets run the last mile
All the sacrifices we've had to make,
for passion an dperfection's sake,
Is made worthwhile with ten minutes on stage,
Friday, 11th May at SCH.
Play your hearts out,these moments are fleeting;
Dance to the rhythm, sing for the notes;
Live the music, all in one sitting.
Lambchops, Bollywood and private jokes aside,
Play AC band,play with all your might.
After the storm has cleared and we see the light of day,
Let the world know that AC Band is here to stay.
-AC Band exco 2006-2007
i tink it was a nice poem:D thanks exco.
11th may irmb that day as if everything was part of a fairy tale. waking up, and receiving messages of well wishes, then rushing to school for breakfast, and meeting my classmates, and they were all like, "band syf alr ah! HOWHOWHOW?" and iwas like "wat? i just woke up lah."
haha, then waiting in the LT for everybody then eating at the void deack with the clarients, thanks for the vitagen bz and mx:D oh and sarah that muffin rocks. OMGOSH, the best stuff lah! then busy preparing and stuff, then running through. and the card from the helpers.omgos, so prettylah! "Let us hear you ACJ-More than Musicians"(: then... we went for toilet break, then we had lots of talks, from exco, ms sng, and guosheng we tuned and we went off to SCH, for our turn to shine.
i forgot all about my hp lah. haha. then i almost din haf place to sit, brotehr adn i almost got shifted to the brasses, but in the end just nice, so brother and i sat together nad we talked about how tis gna be, so i asked bro,"going for dinner later?"he said"see results lah"
then we reach sch, seeing the hustle and bustle of all the other schools. we walked in, with what YD said made us different from the rest, with confidence in our eyes. though at first a little bit shaky in the tuning room, we still headed off to go on stage for our ten minutes. after thumbs up were passed all the way down the row to me to doclee. we strode off. and waited outside the hall, laughing adn yet feeling a slight tinge of nervousness, but we laughed it off and cheered each other on.
hearing TJs music at the background.
but though we heard them we did not panic.
we walked up the stage. shitou ac,shi wo men de tai(rock AC its our stage). looking as glam as we were, as sure as we could be. and soon the announcment ran out annoucning our pieces adnthen band no. 15 Anglo chinese junior college, under the baton of doc lee tian tee, and we rose. we din know what else to expect, but i believe everyones heart was set to do our best. so we started with our rhytmic excercise,last chord. we held it, adjusting, and editing. and watching doc lee as he ended it. leaving an echo.so long. so beautiful,it boosted our morale. it was beautiful..it was 10 secs long.
safari. we started. everything. accorddingly, everything fell into place, screw ups were minor and unnoticeable, we listened to doc lee advice of.. concentrating at teh good parts. we were happy when we were in tune with a beautiful organ sound. we were happy when the perc came in on time, when the saxes came in, when joel played his solo with all his might. when thebasses came in sounding as one. when the clapping were on time. full of confidence and in a high. we played roman. we were delighted when the winds came in tgt, when we all played together. when we moved, as we moved with the waltz to part 43 to every part. there was no moment where we felt all was lost, it was clear, the music was there. as we watched doc lee. it never felt that good.
when we were done, we rose to receive our applause and we left the hall. everyone flustered with happiness. we settled our instrument and we went around mingling, talking to our ex band mates, our friends form other jcs. pamela asked sam nad me, whether we had any regrets. we were proud to say no.we had none. cos we did our best. we all knew we did. seeing huilin, papa, erjie,sange, annabella,cindyand everyone else.
as we couldnt go in to listen, most of us stood outside standing tgt as a band, and sticking to each otehr, as we talked rubiish excitedly waiting the results. all the bands were shooed to first level, and we waited there impatiently many crowding over phones. i just sitting. and hearing shouts of joy or disbelief from other bamds. when suddenyl ACJC started screaming whooping and jumpgin. GOLD WITH HONOURS. it was liek a bonous above all! we enjoyed what we played. and we even got out aim. godl with honours! all our hard work. all our days of work. all our nights dedicated to music. it paid off. we cheered and shouted we were so happy, and the euphoria never left us even when we went back o school. when we had our last gathering. as we waited for doc lee to come. as we tropped to hv to haf dinner nearly 40 of us, we took up the entire 2nd level of BK. we couldnt stop talking about the music we played. we couldnt stop relieveing what we had experienced.
after weeks of hard work, after weeks of stress, after weeks of effort from the exco, alumni, and everyone else. after all of doc lee hard work. we did it. we did what we set out to achieve to play our best.and to enjoy it.
thank you everyone who supported the band, thank you GS,kor,mx and YD esp for all their hardwork in improving the band, thanks for all the pep talks, thanks for all the hardwork from doc lee, thanks for the motivation from the exco thanks for all the support from our school mates, our own band mates, form the helpeers.frome veryone. thank you.
thank you to stanford,bryant,NicA,shujing,meiying,ianthe,gen for their mesages, thanks for the notes of encouragement form jef,jiejiepooi, and the exco.
thanks.
for letting me enjoy that moment on stage.
tank you for the 10 sec echo
for the music.
and no matter what mistakes happen that day we shall leave them as reminders that the best is yet to be. and we can always be better than what we are already.
we made ac proud. we made our alumni proud. and we did ACBAND proud.
to God be the glory, the best is yet to be..
[em]ily_ 8:14 PM
Friday, May 4
boo.. tiring boring day.
HAPPY BELATED BDAY SARAH LEE(:
[em]ily_ 8:30 PM
Wednesday, May 2
frustrated. why cant everyone just try to concentrate, and to open up. stop closing up to toher ideas.stop tinking up of new things based on othrs and writing it out on your own.without any discusion.dun go around volunteering others.
if you want to be a leader start learning servant leadership.
im stresed frustrated and at my limit.
yay for nuts and crazy fricking annoying !@#$%^&*
ok i din say that.
NINE
[em]ily_ 8:08 PM
Sunday, April 29
just one more chance.
please show me that i can trust you again.
and let things be as before.
[em]ily_ 5:23 PM
empty words.
empty hearts.
i dunno..whether you can truly comprehend.
i dunno when i can believe and trust those words you told me..as earnestly as i did before.
at first i doubted you'll be there,you din even know what time it was at, but then i wanted to trust you and that you would turn up. i tried to believe that you would. but you didnt.
maybe im just being unreasonable. maybe im just being petty. maybe im just being...selfish.
i dunno, but im human, and no matter how introverted i am.
i hate being alone.
anw, THANK YOU SAM AND SARAH FOR BEING THERE FOR ME WHEN I NEEDED SUPPORT THE MOST(: you guys rock my socks!(: thank you esp to sam who went all the way to dover alone, and climb the gate alone, just to bring back lunch for me to eat and just so she could eat with and stand by mebefore and after auditions.thank you !!!(:
and thank you for all the moral support you ppl gave to me while i waited for sarah to finish so i could go in, thanks to the tubas,the tbones, esp eugene,soomin and michelle, and everyone else. and all the encouragement i got from so many ppl along the week:D
but im still kinda disapointed cos i screwed up so much, even though im in, i screwed up somuch.shit lah. so much to do.so little time.but ill do it just pushing on a teeny bit more.
yest dinner was great. went to eat zhicha at XO yupian placce, with the OMGOSH WONDERFUL OTAH:Dthank you doc lee for the treat!(: and then ben got so red from i tink the XO yu pian, that we were making fun of him for being drunk, and how stuart and suyin were having serious ego fights, and martin trying to practise sit and reach andim sorry that i spilled my bowl of soup all over the table guys! SORRY.somehowitstillfeltemptyinside.then after dinner i rushed back to school to get the blazer, thank gawd they were still hafing soundcheck.and it was still open.thanks sam for coming with me. then i dropped her off at starbucks and took 75 home. tired.yawn.
lots of hmwk, but ive lost all drive to start. oh well, i will somehow.shrug
til later then ppl! see ya around(:
[em]ily_ 10:44 AM
Friday, April 27
i refused to go school today.(doesnt mean i can slack today, piano, and mugging-.-)
and now my mum doesnt want me ot go for band tmr(i have an mc)
die lah.
auditions how.
[em]ily_ 12:44 PM
Wednesday, April 25
history essay outline. physics tutorial. maths tutorial. GPP.
those are due til tmr. and are stilln yet to be done
GP IL, phy IL,another maths tutorial.chem tutorial.some cheena analysis thing, GP file.
that should be started SOON.
i told myself no coffee unless really needed.
but nowadays(anights?) i got way no choice. ive been drinking coffee so regularly again.just to complete my work every night, and yet, the pile never seems to end. the papers, continue to flunk, or head that direction.the work getting tougher, and im getting more tired. and expecting to get rest on my only day of break, sunday, is futile now. i haf to spend the entire day somehow stumbling and tumbling, in order to somehow cope.though some how i know its to no avail.
oh boy. this few days have been incredibly horrible, me tryingto prepare for audtiions..worklaod, band ending late aint helping eiter, bt theres not much choice i dunerstand. and coffee makes me irrational.
i need to sceram it all out. i tink my brain just exploded during PW today, and then i whacked my head on the window so many times, i din know how else to contain it.
rite..back to work. if i sleep tonite.
yay.
[em]ily_ 9:49 PM
Sunday, April 22
i feel like those little kids from japan that suffer from cram school with the same immdediate aftereffects. though i know that mine is nothing in comparision with the sufferings they feel, i swear im losing it. im losing my life and whatever motivations i haf left in my life one by one its all slwoly dwindling away. its like how lifes just breaking apart. its been breaking apart almost everymonth before i struggle to piece it back together, and then as unstable as it is, it somehow stands, only to be crushed again soon later.
i dunno what to do. and honestly im being driven to a state called i dont carea nymore. and its all starting with my PI. i dun care about my PI anymore. i reallyrelalyreallyreallyyy HECK CARE about my pi anymore. it can go screw itself.
theres still chem weekend hmwk, physics correction,history essay maths TWO tutorials, GPP draft to consider, and physics tutorial. then i haf a chem and history test next week as well as spa. and all the otehrs. i swear if someone presented me with an opportunity to drop out of school
i will.
[em]ily_ 2:48 PM
Friday, April 20
we all felt the horror on stage. i still rmb that. and i refreshed my memory by listening to the recording clement sent me. and once more, i relieve the horror that was felt on stage, i relieve the nightmares that follow.the disaster that was experienced.
its true that with more preparation and practice, chances is it would never have had happened. but since its happened, one must face the truth and instead be more concerned over the future and wat lies ahead them. howw wuld one walk forward, with their eyes focused at the trodden path behind them.
i guess a great deal of reflection had filled up watever tiny space that there may haf existed in the space in my head. and i guess in many ways more than one, not just everyone, but not to forget MYSELF-that i need to buck up immensely. passion and perfection. one could never truly work out without the other..
i dunno what to do anymore.
its quite disheartening to hear and see what i hear and see.... its quite worrying to look into the future.... and think of what may happen..and sometimes i wonder what is going to happen exactly. will anything turn out right? will i be able to handle the situation? will ppl stop forgetting and remember the horror of the past, to propel them to not make the same mistakes again and not instead make worse mistakes. in certain ways ppl are asking for their own demise. and their own inconvenience. i wonder...
ARGH and stupid school works murdering me. but oh well at least i passed physics test rite on the dot, and chem as well.. and that stupid woman locked us out of class today.wth.
but swim pe was kinda fun. except when the pressure thingy and the deafness thingy.-.-
oh well. thanks dear for being there for me(: but ill be ok(:
alrites tmr is sound check. the best is NOW. may tmr be prodcutive and fruitful in many ways...as possible:D jiayou band. lets do what we need to dowith passion and perfection in mind and our hearts and our aims and goals.
[em]ily_ 9:24 PM
Wednesday, April 18
sometimes..one would take a step back and wonder...
what the world would've been like if you were not born..nsmtimesitshardnottobelievettitwouldvebeenabetterplace
its hard not to.. wonder.
[em]ily_ 9:31 PM
hey world emilypooi currently dying of boredom in pw.
yanzhi working hard, martins swilring nuts on the chair,jeffreys watching bleach and audreys reading blogs, but working hard.
me.im just bored.
boooo.....
lala, i SHOULD get a new blogskin...hmmm. ohhh wellllll..... im lazy, but i'll get down to it sooner or later.
erm. :( tired.:D
tonites a long nite, lots of mugging and work to do jiayou pooi! i can do it:(
if only i knew what to do instead of just staring and being lost as i am.
[em]ily_ 12:32 PM
Tuesday, April 17
helpless..what can i do.
confused.
lost.
annoyed.
frustrated.
shit lah
[em]ily_ 10:37 PM
Friday, April 13
im glad to know i can still bitch quite effectively.. someone seriously wake her up.
the bird was so annoying, shat all over the table and NicA's file. HAHA he was SO damn traumatised.lol..
and then there was lizad on my bag, i picked it by the tail and chased it away.it was kinda adorableee leh. alritesalrites im weird.:D
friday the 13th-eventful day
physics test byebye.
[em]ily_ 8:49 PM
Monday, April 9
boo. ahhhh.. finally a slight teeny weeny bit of break,but i still need to prepare for chem common test and revise maths and physics:D but ah well a slight breather never the less..:D
ahhhh MI, summation and AP/GP, stupid boring nonsense maths chaps... how to do man....damn crap...
haha, todays physics test is screwed. i forgot the formula.or rather i was so blur that even tho i derived it, i din realise it-.-wth. and i dunno how to do some of the questions..im quite screwed...oh man...screweedddd.sigh.
but at least its not counted for CA.
:D
wahlao martins in my PW group. the rest are audrey, yanzhi nad jeffrey.hopefully pw goes well, and end sfast.:D i want my free periods... im beginning to get o know my calss better and better. im happy:D
and LT1 now seriouslyt gives me the creeps. especially when its silent and everything...*shivers*
my throat is quite screwed btw. nice screwed up voice. and coughing at a relatively constant rate.:D im so pro, i never knew i could be so pro.:D
alrighty..schools killingme, but ill survive. im sick of pe.seriously, with all the rubbish ive been going through.boring pe.annoying teachers.andtiring lessons.thyers a lot of reasons to hate sachool, and yet alot of reason why i eventually drag myself there and stuff..
anw.
JIAYOU CRESCENT FOR TMRWS SYF!!!!!(: YOU GIRLS CAN DO IT.rest well and dun panic! remember DEEP BREATHE before you play.YOU CAN DO IT!:D
[em]ily_ 6:37 PM
Saturday, April 7
band camp
dads birthday-HAPPY BIRTHDAY
fosters
night games.
scary.
trauma.
butt ache.
soli.
schererezarde
sick.
thank you.
[em]ily_ 9:00 PM
Wednesday, April 4
im tired. i haf three essays to be done by tmrw. and i relaly haf no mood to get about doing ti. shitshtishti. i want to die seriously.
PI. HISTORY. CHINESE.
plue a physics tutorial.
it IS my fault for not getting to it earlier... but argh. still i want to die. someone kill me now. but heck... somehow ill get it done. two cans thats all i need.
oh well todaychiobu din come.[he almost got saboed into cip rep.LOL] yea. sooo it was just sc,martin,tiff nad audrey nad me. chinese lesson was rubbish, i hate that teacher through adn through, she wont even give me an extension to hand up my essay from morning tmr, til 430 tmr. shes really darn bitchy annoying..and sickeningly naggy.and she hates us. EL really sucks btw. kinda stinks worse than NL1.
then there was hist.nth much to say, my headache was screwing my concentration, and im curseing myself for not reding up on the cuban missile crisis beforehand. argh. im so fricking behind i want to kill myself. i tink i zoned out most of the time.sc says hes gna drop hist. wahlaos.hahaha. oh well, if he wants to. :D less ppl to help rush tutorials.LOL
erm.. then there was chem lect-boring. martin told me to listen, which failed terribly. neatfreak martin. i stated my chinese essay. cos i couldnt take it anymore. and sc said my chinese was like sai.thanks alot buddy. i know it sucks , but wahlao abit ncier can!boo.haha
and PW. wahlaos my entire PI was wrong, so now i haf to redoit,with lots of research, i dun tink im gna survive. whats so cool about velcro. im currently searching for new ideas. lol. since martins nad mine were wrong, and since martin lost his neatfreak-ness we started screwing up his pi paper. LOL and our ego fight is like one it. wth.hahaha.
martin"i can draw with my left hand!"
emily"wow! im so amazed that i can almost jump donw the building"
martin"yea! the world will now be a better place!"
emily"of cos! with the best gone, the standard of good will def drop wat"
martin"doctor prescribe you wrong medication"
emily"yea, you also wat"
martin"yea but at least mine is for just body ailments, yours is like the mind"
emily"are you eating medication to maintian your manliness."
KO.emily wins!:D
ok there was more rubbish, but i cant really rmb them all in detail.lol but that werethe best few.:D
PCCG was rubbish, its not ok. i want to stand up and sayt its not ok to her lah.wth.
got my daddees present alr. fridays band camp, wont be around for dinner cos its my dads bday. but should be coming back for nite, need ppl to come fetch me and stuff, dark and dangerous.LOL. just kidding ill be fine.
congrats to those who made it in for audtions, and to those who din...(tho i know im not in a good position to say this, cant help but feel that..its my fault..) dun give up yea? june concerts coming up, perfect scherezarde and roman and lets make june concert worthwhile yea? take it as a good opportunity for working on your basics. and stuff. dun give up and dun lose faith nad jiayou for scherezarde wish ill haf that much time fo rthat piece.haha.
ok.. i ebtter do my pi. must rush. and finish it in less than an hour.piano at 8. someone seriously. kill me now.
im tired.
coffees making me a walking zombie
[em]ily_ 5:53 PM
Tuesday, April 3
too much emotions cramped up in my brain
too much to tink about...
too much falling apart...
too much work..
too much to convince myself.,.
headache...
[em]ily_ 10:25 PM
Monday, April 2
:D
that is the most useful thingy ever. im serious.
ppl will think you're alrite in a moment.
shrug i dunno.
i tink im still pretty upset over march. i know its not gna do much crying over spilt milk... but... it just hurts lah yea. ive been practising this piece SO much.looking forward t it. and not giving up on it... somehow.. not giving up on it. lal my effort... argh. i know i shall stop tinking about it.
i know i should i know i should.. but its hard. iwant to.. i want to cry out a bit more..when m alone. and just cry it and get it over with. i just want it to end.i want to cry and get over it. but no its just getting stuck in my heart with no way of leaving me. ARGH. shit me. y cldnt i haf figured to screw in that thingy. and it'll all be ok alr. but nooo. i din. and i screw up.. my solo. my impt part. my part that ive worked on for ages. emily. you suck big time.
booo. ok NO ONES ALLOWED TO SAY THAT ITS OK. and wat scerw up happen and you know you can do it anw and stuff. just dun say that, it'll prob make things worse. thanks for caring... but rite now. i guess i just need time to forgive myself.
somone kill me now.
damn.
il be strong.somehow.
[em]ily_ 3:09 PM
:D
how to not love this section, filled with crap and randomness, good memories nad bad ones. filled with friendship nad support for one another.for the past three months.we've all been pushing on tgt.:D thanks for MUSE.
[em]ily_ 11:10 AM
Saturday, March 31
TMR. we're gonna go up on esplanade stage as ACJC band
TMR.we're gna play what we've been practsing for so long
TMR.we're gna be able to face the audience with a smile.
TMR. we're gna shine.
TMR.those dead black things on paper will jump up,alive as beautiful music
TMR.we'll do as well as we possibly can.
TMR.we're gna make magic
are YOU ready?
acband! we can do this TOGETHER.(:
MUSE.
here we come(:
Q"where are the rest!"
A"on a music score."
a lame music joke(:
[em]ily_ 10:08 PM
Friday, March 30
HEY. concerts on sunday, i wun be online tmr. i tink.
PPL JIAYOU!
TWO
thats all we haf left.
so lets make magic(:
~
anw im relaly sorry for the lack of updates, ive been REALLY busy, as in seriously busy. and lots of hmwk, late practices,late nites. exhausted and yea. so today i haf no mood to talk much, still got tons of stuff to do lah.:p
alrighty..
anw to that idiot whoever you are. it had better be an accident. or you're so screwed. thats shit lah. irresponsible, selfish shit.you know who you are. i dunno who you are. but you better return wats not yours.like now.cos you're not the only one who needs it.
and thanks to you dear. for being there for me throughout this entire extremely exhauting and stressful time of mine. thank you so much really.(:
and i relaly pray tmrw will turn out fine.please...
seeya at MUSE
[em]ily_ 10:04 PM
Sunday, March 25
the best of the best!
but half way there!
1sb8 yeaaaaaaaa!!
sorry nostalgia:D
[em]ily_ 10:24 PM
i WANT to play in alumni. if only i oculd figure a way to convince my parenst!):
true i may not haf even like oviced it out yet.
but they just whined about me hafing too many normal band practs.
why would they let me get involved in another one
LINCHOSHIRE POSY!
RHAPSODY IN BLUE!
ARMENIAN DANCES!
YOU ARENT DOING THIS TO MEEEEEEEEE):
[em]ily_ 8:42 PM
my bro says i haf a heat rash on the right side of my face.shit.
[em]ily_ 6:30 PM
i rmb longlong long ago my mum told me-"you cant help everyone."
why does such a dumb thing haf to be true?
i saw a eeyore pouch today. a handphone one that looks like my current other one, only that its smaller, eeyore is so much cuter, and sadly-its pink-.- it sPINK. if not i owuld haf bought it alr.omgosh. an di know i know, for wat rite. i also dunno for wat, but haha, im a girl after all, bad habit we have as girls. (and shut up yingda about the feminie side and stuff, makes me watn to whack you even more lah.) but yes ive stopped attacking you alr lah, hallo im becoming like how nice.:D i cant stand it.:D
hmm.im probably playing for alumni, cos they apparently nd a bass clar.oh man stressfull. i hope ill still be able to cope with work and stuff.im a bit worried.. but oh well.. see how yea.rhapsody in blue, linchoshire posy,armenian dances. fun pieces! hope i can play them well fast.and of cos one would worr about the fact that exactly one week form now it'll be like concert.as in the one that like at esplanade, not alumni one. im still playing like shit. and it sucks liah.oh gosh. i hope things turn out rite.:( like all the tuning and stuff. ARGH.why are we only here at this point of time.
i need icecream.i need sugar, i need energy im sleepy and tired. and i dun want to go school tmrw.i dun want to see that eccentric woman. i dun want o suffer classes. and i hate my new timetable. its filled with words. i want more blanks!stupid PW.:(
anwyest was an intersting day i guess. went for pract, then had like combined sectionals. tuning sucks.:( thenlunch,me sarah nad jy were too lazy to go out. so we ordered macs in. bz, mx nad huiru were ensembling tnext door. and omgosh that prank was so darn annoying nad funny.HAHAHA. if only i oculdve seen their reactions!hahaha.:D yup we ate and pract throughout lunch, then after a while i went to mug instead, co si was tired. then had combined. dun want to talk about, im still upset over intonation.and i dunno what to do=(
then after that dinnering.went hv thai express-sam,ben,stuarta,jef,me,zhiwen,shaun,huilin,enjia,eileen. yeathe lot of us.had our like PHAT THAI(or as sturta says fat thighs-.-) and i and en were swinging on the stuff and ifeel down twice-.- then we ate and ate. and talk crap. then, sam,ben,stuarta,jef,me and shaun went off for starbucks, co swe stoned there for a while and decided lets go grab something.:D the stars were pretty tho. i saw the arrow thingy again. i was so happy. pretty starssss:Djef grabbed his egg sandwich from coffee bean and brought it into starbucks.hahaha. and then we had our fraps and crapped like crazy there.darn rubbish can.:D then after a while kristen came. the whole day they kept playing with sams clarient stand.HAHA. yup.
then went home, and yea. stoned until i fell aslp, sorry sam about not being able to stay up late enoguh to talk to you.:(
yup ok gna do stupid hist essay now. i haf no idea wth im writing, sscerw this essay, just whack lah. whack my best, hopefully wont screw up too bad.need to do this and chem and phy maybe and read maths man.maths m so behind, im so dead. oh well.
workworkwork. seeya!(:
For You I Will (Confidence)
Teddygeiger
Wondering the streets, in a world underneath it all
Nothing seems to be, nothing tastes as sweet
As what I can't have
Like you and the way that you're twisting your hair round your finger
Tonight I'm not afraid to tell you
What I feel about you.
I'm gonna muster every ounce of confidence I have
and cannon ball into the water
I'm gonna muster every ounce of confidence I have
For you I will
For you I will
Forgive me if I stutter
From all of the clutter in my head
Cuz I could fall asleep in those eyes
Like a water bed
Do I seem familiar, i've crossed you in hallways
a thousand times,no more camouflage,
I want to be exposed, and not be afraid to fall.
I'm gonna muster every ounce of confidence I have
And cannon ball into the water
I'm gonna muster every ounce of confidence I have
For you I will
You always want what you can't have
But I've got to try
I'm gonna muster every ounce of confidence I have
For you I will
For you I will
For you I will
For you
If I could dim the lights in the mall
And create a mood I would
Shout out your name so it echos in every room
I would
That's what I'd do, That's what I'd do to get through to you
I'm gonna muster every ounce of confidence I have
And cannon ball into the water
I'm gonna muster every ounce of confidence I have
For you I will
You always want what you can't have
But I've got to try
I'm gonna muster every ounce of confidence I have
For you I will
For you I will
For you I will
For you I will
http://www.lyricstop.com/f/foryouiwillconfidence-teddygeiger.html
toodles!~
[em]ily_ 3:59 PM
Friday, March 23
i dun tink i owuldve known what to do.. if there wasnt you..thanks for helping me so much. (:
im the greatest sidekick ever...i kinda felt like that woman knows me better than i know myself.haha. scary.ISFJ, part of the 13.8% in singapore.i feeel less unique now..HAHA. oh welll
i f\guess i should relaly try to ovrceom these hard times, cos eventually i will:D
jiayou emily.(:
band tmr shall be productive.YEA!(:
[em]ily_ 10:01 PM
Wednesday, March 21
boo. i went to toilet and i knew oh shit.
these past two days haf been pretty shti for me, but i sure hope that it'll get over and done with soon. and that things will turn for the better before i know it. everythings been screwing up, andhoneslty im lost as to wat to do. exhaustion isnt helping.
anw my bros back form india. so i dun tink ill be using hte comp as much again, and posts shall resume shortness. yeap this sucks.-.-
goodbyeee(:
[em]ily_ 8:19 PM
Monday, March 19
reading old chatlogs that my copm saved.like from long ago. the latest few csince like last year mid year.. it was evil enough not to save-.- memories of good ole times, looking back at the past nad copmaring it to the future. its damn funny:D
hahaha.
anw i really miss sb8..
and i know sb6 can never be the same sb8.. but i hope sb6 can be cool an unique in their own way.... i tink im over attached to sb8. i should try to get to know my new classmates more...
hahaha. ok today i dun haf much mood to tlak anymore. but yea, miss you guys sb8, and hope to get to know you sb6
[em]ily_ 9:18 PM
Sunday, March 18
i realised that i hafnt uploaded picts on O2 yet. the rest will be uploaded to shutterfly shortly.:Dfor now heres some snapshots:D
tongue-tied cherrysticks:D
we're all dirty.....
dun be a butterfly,behemoth
at swensens
mrsmilie!:D
[em]ily_ 10:28 PM
holidays just passed like..whooosh. and right now im like-AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
too many tutorials to do, too little time. and to make things worse, i cant get my chem rite. ever since jc started, i cant get my chem rite.my physics adn maths neither.
and i realise, i suck at time management
i din even read half my gp package yest, and im kinda pissed with myself.
pooimingliemily.for goodness sake,wake up and do your work.
[em]ily_ 11:29 AM
Saturday, March 17
sb6. omgawsh. this sucks.:( i dunno lah, i mean the new class may be pretty cool and stuff. but one, i dun really like that teacher. i want kyl as my chem teacher instead! but i guess i should be thankful its not a physics teacher..two, most of the ex-sb-eighters are now in...sb9...and thus BOOOOOO.:( and theres no band ppl inm y new class- itink.sighh.. oh well.
i love you sb8 PAE!and ill miss you guys SO MUCH.
but i guess one just haf to look forward into the future, and try to think positively. what has past has after all past, and one should just be thankful that at least it happened. iguess.. somethings..just cant be helped. though i may not really believe in a superior being..i do believe in something called fate, and that what happens,happens for a reason, and that as long as i try to tink positively.. iguess everything wil be ok, somehow. i dunno...il try my best i guess..since wats done, is done, nothing much i can do but move on, and make the best outta it.
alrite ill try to talk about today like the last two humongously long posts.(for me at least.)
lets see.. left house at 715?gna meet jef and stuart at bv.took a huge detour to JP and bought like food to eat.then reached bv 5 mins late, but still earlier than them.but one train.HAHA.erm.. ok ytea, then went off to school, reached school stoned as the rest checked their classes, tried to figure out hu my formteacher is, but i apparently af like 2? i dunno. i ony know hus one of them..boring chem lecturer.oh well, if shes nice, thats alltheat matters.
rushed for sectionals. boo, i want to be mroe effective. i shall be mroe disciplined. control myself.and somehow not screw up anymore than i alr haf..boo.i admit that the inability to get the running notes, is demoralising me.but ill persevere..somehow.yup. then we moved our stuff to the hall..and left to go eat pizza for lunch. yup. went to talk to sam for a while during lunch.she took a cool photo of my hair man!:Dhahaha, pity its invertedi tink its cool, but only sam agrees with me.haha
then combined, i admit exhaustion had finally completely overcome me, i was dozing off-.-im damn pissed with myself now, luckily those parts are my breaks. consdiering my 100 bar rests in roman. then playplay, i sucked at tosca today, it was so horrible, im damn bloody pissed with myself hjonestly for my playing to day, i tink i sucked.rather.i sucked.
then the acs ppl, came.. pract phantom, me and sarah got seperated, i told darren, we're GAYS you know. and he said amos, time to run away. haha! but okok, its serioulsy just a girl school thing, im seriously not interested int he same gender humans in tha tsense.im straighter than straight.haha.
went for run through.erm..oh yea. stupid thing happened. i tripped on the stairs, and as i flailedand fumbled, i accidently whacked sarahs butt nad off, i fell ont he floor, yea new brusie on my left shin, that makes it three talking about brusises i tink i haf one above my right eye.from the otehr time when i crashed into the table.oh welll..im getting more accident prone by the day.haha.ok after all that..had to rearrange the hall, omgosh, so confusing0.0 i suck at this man:D haha, then we were gna go dinner.hahha, after the usual dilly-dallying finally went off to the coffee shop next to drlees house, i went there for my first ac abnd dinner:D i rmb! haha.yupp. kinda rubbish day.. buying icecream and all that crap, and stuarts rubbish:Dthen the rest went off to drlees house, but i had to go home,
so i went off. lala.went back to ac, to take bus home, stupid 198 passed me.IT ALWAYS DOES THAT. and i almost got on the wrong bus again-.-grrrr. omgosh. isuck.-.-then i felt super motivated and i started reading gp. anw. i dun care how long it takes.im gna read gp package by tonite.seriously. cos.i need to start working, ive been slacking too much.i need to get back onto the track.seriously.
anw firstly humans try nt to sms me too much my sms count is rocket high.and theres almost half a month left to go. i dunno how id do it.
secondly, please refrain from aggravating me.for the next few days. yesyes,im pmsing. SEE ben,mx and bz, its coming ok!since you all want to know. yup i am thus more uptight..more sensitive..and more easily annoyed. i can shed tears in mere seconds if i wanted to, and for no reason at all. thats how low i can feel. but aiya.. igeuss, just try not to , i mean tis not fun without bullying me rite.:D
thirdly, im seriously not gna waste energy chasing ppl anymore, or at least not unless its really off..and bad.then you die. but ill still poke.if you piss me off:D
and im sorry for huever hu had to bear with me today, cos i was a little crappy cos i was super tired..the whole day. and i could get quite quiet and irritated easily.im sorry. yup.
hey..im always here to listen yea.so..yea.
i really wish i could offer such help.. and actually succeed in cheering ppl up
yup. thats all i can tink off. goodnite.me too tired to tink anymore, and i really should start on gp now.
[em]ily_ 10:18 PM
Friday, March 16
heyy... i decided to blog about today!:D yay, so for thsoe who dun realise, theres gna be LOTS of posts suddenly! cos i haf a long one from yest below this. which i admit i did quite successfully made it loooonnngggg. today i shall succeed as well!:D so a boring account on emilys life on the 16th march. starts now.(doh-.-)
lets seeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.after sleeping at 3am last nite, emily was kinda drowsy and did not appreciate it when mummy dearest came to ehr room to wake her up at 9 plus saying that the ppl are coming to do up the house nad that i should wake up alr.s i got up. had prata for breakfast:D but i tink the curry was too little, but heck:p good food is good food:D yumyum. then i was online, blogging the post you see below thereeee. until the humans doing the house finally arrived liek at 1130.(why did i haf to wake up so early?!) so i tried to do physics, did half a question and gave up.:p then after taht left early to go meet nette and liu at bugis. waitedwaited. then i got on the bus. i was talking to jefri on the phone. then talktalk then suddenly.
jef:where are you now?
em: on 960. going bugis.
*em looks up to look around her eyes become like this 0.0*
em:eh, i tink im on the wrong bus leh
jef: why! you should be passing barker soon lah, the route is long and weird but should be correct
em:hm.. i tink im on the wrong bus...
jef: go ask the uncle lah, why you say you on wrong bus
em:i dun tink im supposed to be at woodlands now am i.
jef:0.0
em: im getting off the bus. got mrt to take.
*em gets off turns around and look at bus*
em: OH MY GAWSH. its 963! THREEE not 960!
how pro can i get man. see three until can become zero. smart lah!and thats how i ended up late. sorry nette and liu.=( haha, then when we were at bugis. we went to eat at...AJISEN! YUM. hee.:D nicenice foooddd=p then we talked alot of crap liek about ibs orientation about ac orientation and about like lius class outing. then later bz sms me say"i tink you're periods coming",then sam told me that ben was telling the whole word of what happended yest, and that retard sms=p then i was like-.- then i had to call samho, cosnette din know abt class outing.. so jeanette demanded to know about it.so i called sam, then after a whlie she passed the phone to mx, me thinking it was ben, started saying you die you die. then as always mx got sterssed up and was liek whatt!! why!!!! haha! then he passed the phone to stuart, then i thot it was ben again. then i continued with my you die you die! then stuart was like whos this! then i realised it was stuart. and i started lauhging. then after a while i hung up on them, fo rfun=p then i called again lah. and this time it was bz who talked rubbish about the period thingy-.- hahaha. yuppp that ended the "traumatic" experience over the phone.
then jeanette, liuqing and me walked to kkmn.anime place, hafnt been there for ages, hafnt seen these stuf in ages, hafnt been in touch with my aniem in ages! =p as we reached sunshine plaza, i felt the call of a stomach ache, and thus i went straight to the loo. suddenly realising htat i had earlier needed to go anws.but i forgot.-.- ok then looklook seesee, hafnt felt so lost around aniem in ages, but there were pretty cool collectables, but im broke, and i din want to spend another cent. and so i din. i controlled. yay emily power-.- haha.then after a while we headed off to go back, me for piano. then i go tthe message. from my mum. a replacement teacher was gna take me for class. i thot it was that yucky one form the last time, so i got really sad. then i wanted to pon even mroe, so i went to esplanade library. and i parted from liuqing nad jeanette.
and here i met the band ppl. for a few mere minutes. there was xy, sam,ben,stuart,bz,kristen and mx. and then later jefri appeared.mugged for abit, and stoned for the rest fo it, left esplanade at 510. i strolled allll the way to city hall mrt. so fun.-.- i reached the mrt at 530, class starts at 545, i was like yay im gna be late.HAHA. then i reached jurong at 550. then went to go photostat some stuff. then reached class at 615, 30 mins late, im so pro i cant believe it.haha..
when i reached sonare, there was no one in the class, i was liek woah, the teacher must be pissed man. but turns out she was chitchatting with another teacher in another room. the woman outside who waited with me, told me that there were twoteachers talking int he room and recommened i go knock on the door and check, but i told her, nvm, wait a bit.=p HAHA, anyhtign to be later.oops. i din say anything.hahaha. then wahlao class sucked lah, i nkow i cant b\play,but she made me repeat ceratin parts os often! and the reason why i complain is cos, my arms muscles hurt like shit from gym yest, and 'smashing' my fingers onto the keyboard to play chords relaly screwed up my arms more.so tiring.hahaha. i tink the teacher tinks im hopelessly lousy:D expected. i am after all hopelessly lousy.. :D then at 645 she looked at the clock int he room, then she was like..is this clock fast, *goes to check own watch* ok class ended you may go. and i was like. YEA. this rocks man.i almost wanted to tell ehr no mdm the watch isnt fast incase you din realise i was late, but heck just mark my attendence and im happy. i tink im getting outta hand.tsk i should work harder.shoudshouldshould.mustmsutsmust.
ok then after taht went to meet my mum, and collect my photostat stuff. saw nabs at entertainment centre. then my mum said too tired no shopping, we go on sunday!
anw question, does anyone know what i haf on on sunday, i feel like got smth and i just cant rmb...hmm....oh well.
then ate at warren clubs restaurant, and went home. so tired.hahaha. but then come home got comp a bti tired only, not as tired anymore, the miracles of a copm:D lala. ok. i din study at all. i need to study.. i need to study. i need to study.hahaha. ok hopefully ill finally mug..
lala.. theres band tmr. i wanna eat a tthaiexpress:p
[em]ily_ 10:11 PM
hey.. i just realised how uselessly boring my posts are getting.=p i should start doing what i was doing all this while. likelike, going through everyyyyyyyy detail in my life.yay. -.- lets see if i can siltl blog like how i used to!:D jiayou!:D
ok yest was thursday, though as always it felt like a sat, cos it was band the wholeeee day.whee. i quite like but- emily. you are still not good enough for gawd sake. work harder and more efficiently! yup. ive been working sosososososooooooooooooooo long on march, liek since like a looonngggg time ago. and yet. i still cant play the running notes, some yes, but not all. emilyemily. why are you so useless. booo. anw yest i went to gym early in the morn like at 8. met jefri and stuart at bv mrt. no stuart was gymming or even going to the gym, hes just going for band early.=p what do you expect from stuart rite!=p then when we reached the gym, met manferd and then we started gymming.
then like yea stupid track mill. i know how to use one. but then i kinda forgotD: shows how pro i am, but its not that it affects, cos i still can run on it, just that i needed to adjust the speed-.- but the speed was reading it in a diff format. so it confused me, just htat i know that speed i was unning at was TOOOOO slow. im like so gna fail 2.4 at this rate-.- then did some weights, and some abs thing. i suck at the abs thing, and then later some arm thing again, tats why my arms are so screwed rite now.owowow then after taht i rushed through my bath and rushed for sectionals which were gonna start earlier . rushrush, turns out i din really haf to rush, cos i was the fourth one there, and liling nad sarah werent there yet:D yay im nto the last! then later had sectionals.
i played with the ipod the march and stuff, with sarah and stuff, it doesnt feel as scary as the first time in like december that i played with the recording. heh. then played festive with bz, tried the saf version one, was too slow then there was one that was faster than doc lees one i tinkco sit felt mroe tiring witha ll the offbeats and stuff.hahaha! yup. then pract my running notes in march, which still sounds fake, or incorrectly faked even-.- omgosh emily.wakeeee upppp!!!! then err.... that was sectionals, then the five girls of lww/dr sectionalswent off for lunch at another coffee shop where me and sarah got addicted to CURRY PUFFS! the bestes curry puffs ever!=p then later we walked back, jy,cass and liling started singing chinese songs, then i kept going HEY. or since they say yo is more suitable. YO! haha, and i did it for the whole day, me and sarah were the HEY-ers and YO-ers. damn funny, the section then sat at the lt4 waiting for otehr ppl listnening to ipods and then moomoo started taking pictures of us with the visualiser-.- hahaha. yup. then band started.
played roman fest the whole day, which meant quite stone period..with 100 over bar rest, then decided to steal abit of parts from bassclar. cos contrabassclar parts so boring seriosuly-.- yea then me nad sam were smsing. quite funny cos her phone died then i smsed the new phone no she was using about girls stuff. and that phones actually bens .doh. so he saw it, and then mx saw it. so now everybody knows. thenthen during break i went to talk to sam to go refill bottle, then ernest was like wat secret! wat secret! so i told him, then he was like-.-" speechless.hahaha! yup.
then er... after band... we were all stoning around. yes i chased liek so many ppl around the place. lets seeee..sam,yingda,michelle.... cant rmb anymore. haha. then i played the thumb game with ben and sam and im still the best man!=p yeaaa i own everyone, btu omgosh bens finger can like bend backwards lah! so i acutally cant reach one lah, but i stil won. pro!=p heh. then yea, sorry aobut the stupid thing. i know you said dun worry alr.. but still. sorry yea, i shall try to think more before talking...and suan elss...and like.. yea, ill try not to chase around so much anymore.
erm tehn we went for dinner, at some laksa place athv. then on the bus i was like hafing fun with the mxfanclub,sam,nicole,stuart and ben,. with their silent cheers and stuff. DAMN RETARD.hahahahaha! so fun!:D lala, then we went to eat laksa which was quite good, but.. so ex lah seriously. nice but ex.. then errrrrrr...... my table had sean,englong(xiaolong!:D) and jefri. yup.talk alot of cock, no i udn want to end up in a class of muggers! BOOOOOO.sean dun surse me!=( then yea, we went for icecream at gelare!:D
thanks doc lee for the treat! icecreammmm. my table was the siaosiao table. doc lee was getting quite amazed and "like omgosh so lame" by us. cos we were like doing mx cheers, and talking rubbish, table had doc lee, stuart,nicole,ben,sam, me and jefri.haha. then we were talkign alot of rubbish nad doing alot of rubbish.hahaha. quite funny. then after a whlie, i had to go home alr. but that game was fun:D
then i talked to sam til 3 last ntie, damn funn! hahaha. but this time i lose, i was the one dozing off more often. hahaha. talked alot of crap and rubbish, and thanks sam, dun tell anyone ok. (: the amount of crap we talked nbeed many flushes from the toilet bowl=p i shall not elaborate. its gossips nad secrets=p hee
self worth, its hard to explain to mysel.i hate myself so often... cos i know im more trouble then anything else.and cos i know im never worth it. dun worry and dun try to convince me of my worth.. cos its not that i dun appreciate that you all care.. itsm more liek it'll be wasting your energy.. its just too hard to convince myself...i never can convince myself that im worth it.or anyway around.its...been like that for many years, and chances is it'll staylike that form any years
anw the construction ppl are here to do some stuff to my house or smth. so there goes the power nad my copm. farewell!
and omgosh. stuart has power boobs man.:D
[em]ily_ 10:56 AM
Wednesday, March 14
one thing i admit that music nad lyrics got me addicted to.. is the music nad lyrics of the songs in the show. yesyes, it sounds retarded, but tis true, so today i haf two songs!! and maybe ill try to finish up my class shoutouts by today, but see circumstances first=p
Way Back into Love
I've been living with a shadow overhead
I've been sleeping with a cloud above my bed
I've been lonely for so long
Trapped in the past, I just can't seem to move on
I've been hiding all my hopes and dreams away
Just in case I ever need `em again someday
I've been setting aside time
To clear a little space in the corners of my mind
All I wanna do is find a way back into love
I can't make it through without a way back into love
Ohhhhh
I've been watching but the stars refuse to shine
I've been searching but I just don't see the signs
I know that it's out there
There's got to be something for my soul somewhere
I've been looking for someone to shed some light
Not somebody just to get me through the night
I could use some direction
And I'm open to your suggestions
All I wanna do is find a way back into love
I can't make it through without a way back into love
And if I open my heart again
I guess I'm hoping you'll be there for me in the end
There are moments when I don't know if it's real
Or if anybody feels the way I feel
I need inspiration
Not just another negotiation
All I wanna do is find a way back into love
I can't make it through without a way back into love
And if I open my heart to you
I'm hoping you'll show me what to do
And if you help me to start again
You know that I'll be there for you in the end
~
and the annoyiny song with a retarded music vid
Pop! Goes My Heart Lyrics
[VERSE 1]
I never thought that I could be so satisfied,
Every time that I look in your angel eyes.
A shock inside me that words just can't describe,
And there's no explaining.
There's something in the way you move, I can't deny,
Every word from your lips is a lullaby.
A twist of fate makes life worth while,
You are gold and silver.
[CHORUS]
I said I wasn't gonna lose my head, but then
POP! Goes my heart.
I wasn't gonna fall in love again, but then
POP! Goes my heart.
And I just can't let you go,
I can't lose this feeling.
[VERSE 2]
These precious moments, we have so few,
Let us go far away, where there's nothing to do but play.
You show to me that my destiny's with you,
And there's no explaining.
(NOTE: The last four lines of verse 2 are not in the music video but are included on the song in the Music and Lyrics Motion Picture Soundtrack.)
[CHORUS] Repeat x2(after first repeat there is is an interupt of lyrics shown below)
A twist of fate makes life worth while,
You are gold and silver.
(second chorus repeat excludes "I can't lose this feeling.")
lyrics from:http://www.metrolyrics.com
i would show you the music vid, but youtube apparently is down=p
[em]ily_ 8:30 PM
esplanade is where we part..for now, but thanks for being a part of my life, and for the sweet memories forged into my head.takecares you all, im stlil working on my shoutouts, i tink im damn slow, but im working on i t im wokring on it. and kors going india tmr, i cnat send him off cos i got band=( haf a safe trip kor! takecare!come back in once piece, and haf fun yea!(:
us at esplande
acting cool at dg mrt station
retard photo at the pool place=D
and we all love sushi(: 
1sb8 is love.
[em]ily_ 10:59 AM
Monday, March 12
HAPPY 60th anniversary of the truman doctrine! but no it isnt a special holiday cos besides it alr is the school holiday! (KS I WANT MY HIST NOTIES BACK)
and hpapy birthday linser!(:
still working on my class shoutouts, and photos from yest will be up soon, ill try my best i promise!
1sb8 is love you guys rock my socks, thanks so much for everything(:
[em]ily_ 10:00 AM
Wednesday, March 7
finallyyyy the heavy burden is over, glad to see that the dark clouds haf finally cleared away..for the warm and radiant sunshine to filter through(:
CONGRATS EVERYONE WHO GOT THEIR APPEAL IN.(:
damn happy for you alllll(:
orientation starts tmr! cant wait=p
(:
[em]ily_ 8:03 PM
Monday, March 5
1sb8 is love=p hahaha. ill intro you to them soon, if i can one find time, get eh otehr photos, and not cos the blogs to lagg
[em]ily_ 10:02 PM
Friday, March 2
this is wat happens after physics lesson-im dying, and stanfords all emo-.- and you jump like crazyyy=p nono, thatisnt drawstring, i tink.(me and xinyue)
and please go for the outing on 11th march ok? pleaseee? xinyue says we're gna haf tugof war over the swimming pool omgosh-.- and bbq, me and billy will make sure theres enough food and stuff, and yea, just come and haf fun kk, even if you all arent staying and stuff, just come yea? one last time tgt as a class, do it for emilypooi at least!(yeayea i know the last person you'll want to do anything for=p)
oh well tmrs theres band,yesh! tmr WILL be productive, gosh. i dun care watever happens, at least I will be productive tmr.and tmr onwards. argh im getting quite frustrated with the pace we're at, seriously.. i relalyrelalyreally dun want to screw up my first muse. jiayou everybody!
oh gosh my lifes getting busier everyday, booo. i relaly need some time to relax and unwind, and thus i relaly cant wait for. SECOND ORIENTATION AND CAMPFIRE. it may turn out to be not as cool as the first, but still.its gonna be damn good in the sense that its gna be a good opportunity to unwind..before i go nuts again.:p i hope there will be cool mass rallies to scream myself hoarse and mud,starch and water games to go wild with, and i hope that we'll get to dance till later at ntie again..(:even if its ends up being not as good as the first, it'll still be great, i just noe it(: cos its acjc after all.. surely it wont be THAT bad...=p
okok i got lots of work to catch up with, the stack keeps getting higher and my head keeps spinning more, class photos should be up by later tonite, still uploading, just click my link of shutterfly in the side bar and then click 1sb8 and you'll find it=p but i shall post a few retard photos first, and then the rest is in the album(:
common scene billy and me fighting =p
and we eat alot=p
and we eat again
and again
retarded irna and me
some class ppl(: durin maths gawd
chinese class=p
toodles!~
[em]ily_ 8:46 PM
Thursday, March 1
founders day! pictures! i hope the blog doesnt lag after this post man=p elmo-crazed bryant n me! zoom in on stupid shitbin, poor cass...seriosusly.=p
hardworking jiaying and me!
good ole cass and me
mad bz n me, he kept jumping up and down lah-.-
the bassclarinettists!(L-R:me,sarah,liling) and mad bz bouncing in
jef and me(:
iiiiirrrrnaaaaaa and me!haha. [em]ily_ 8:28 PM
Wednesday, February 28
boo. tmrs founders day!
anw HAPPY BIRTHDAY GODWIN! yupp enjoy the chocky=p
tmrs founders day! omgosh. i bet its gna be as boring as speech day! okok ill try not to think that way, but anws,anyhow, i will attempt to keep myself entertained, with all my various methods that im sure will work=p yay
i will not feel bored i will not feel bored=p tmrs not half day folks! its band dayy! hahaha. im feeling insanely crappy and outof point today=p i tink its being tired and the fact that i just realised, that i dun need to hand in hist essay tmr! so i dunnd to rush it tonite! i can alr feel the soft pillow under my head=p YAY.
and i had three ice pops today. three LONG ones.=p
hahaha. omgosh. i tink im tired. i TINK im tired but my body doesnt want to move to my bed. i shall cont with my work then.tralala, i said work, not mugging, so its not school related, i assureyou=p
founders day tmr! ill try to look forward to it=p
goodnites!
[em]ily_ 9:16 PM
Sunday, February 25
the antibiotics haf worked. YAY.
its almost completely healed alr i tink, so far feels that way. but after tt prata my dad bought back i tink its coming back. shitshtishti. i dun want that sharp pain to haunt me anymore seriously..i want to be able to enjoy my food.. i couldnt even eat finish my phat thai!:(
ok... seeya ppl around. goodbyeeeee. i shall start with work now. i got tons of it. latelate nite tonite..
goodnites!(:
[em]ily_ 12:34 PM
Thursday, February 22
antibiotics supposed to solve my throat infrection. thats hoping it bacterial and not viral. if not die lah. stupid throat
[em]ily_ 9:42 PM
HALLLOO. yes im not ins chool rite now, no im not ponning. i do have a VALID MC ok.hee, im like how guai lah.=p (and YES, i am like watching the much awaited naruto 221 and 222! im skipping the fillers completely.heh) i should start on my bleach soon too!=p like after how darn long lahhh.:D [HAHAHA. kakashis late again!!!!!:D] naruto really brings back memories...xD
oh did i mention how i have like immense fears that im really quite screwed up. i eman like what the hell, im hafing a bloody fever and i dun feel sick lah! like seriously, yest with a bloody high fever in the afternoon, and i was still like able to climb 7 floors?! haha.and like shit lah, my fevers really fluctuating. like tuesday mornign i was ok, afternoon i had a fever, nite i was ok, then wed morning i had fever, afternoon i was ok, and night i was ok, then tday morning fever now ok. im thankful tt there are no rashes on me, or else, ill freak out even more than i alr am.pleaseplease NO DENGUE FEVER. =(
talking about missing school, suddenly reminded me about sec 4 and how when day1 sabo missed sch, then day2, me and sabo both missed sch. then apparently azlin told jeanette, that she'll be next cos, the three of sit tgt in one row like:
1 2 3 1 2 1 2 me jeanette sabo
1=>a humans table
i bet half of you humans wont haf a clue about this diagram, so heck=p but gosh its so bloody farni! ahh.. the memories... sec4 was damn fun... despite the stress and stuff, i tink i came up with more lame jokes then, but yea, bio was the subject i used to use to come up with lame jokes, and since now theres like no more bio for me, then... oh well. sec 4 was bloody farni...the teachers were so crappy and funny.haha. nostalgia..=p
and since im at the point of nostalgia... ncoooooo): hahaha.
gawd, i want to go for band nowww... but my mum doesnt let meeeeee.:(booo.. oh well.. my throat still doesn hurt.. but.. boo.. oh well..and im starting to feel drowsy again. the medication sucks.=p
oh anw. last nites sleep sucked really badly.i had this like horrible dream. though i cant like exactly rmb it like part by part. i only rmb, that nothing fitted. like nothing went rite. and like everything went the wrong way..nothing could fit into the rite box, no reed fitting into the mouthpiece..nothing fitting in rite and stuff.. really wonder wth i dreamt of something like that, but it really made my dream sucked, and it made things worse with my throat infection.
oh well... anwi just realised that i get to miss mass pe next week! yayyyyyyy. for once im thankful for that doc that i had to visit yest, hu had the incredibly slow and articulated and annoying voice-.-
anwwww, really thanks thanks to all those who asked about me today, call from jeanette,samho,edwin and jef=p my mum was like giving me the wat the hell, who are you talking to=p but thanks you alllll!!!!!!sms from stanford and yea. (:
oh well... school tmr.=p
ok i tink i should go get some rest.=p even though i guess as much i wont=p lala oh well.. later then.seeyaaaa
[em]ily_ 2:35 PM
Monday, February 19
and thats whatCNY is all about-family(: happy CNY PPL!!!!(: 
[em]ily_ 9:28 AM
Saturday, February 17
sometimes i really want to do something..though i know i cant..
[em]ily_ 5:25 PM
i almost ended up doing a.. one line post again. haha. cos the thing is to say..
HAPPY BIRTHDAY SHIBIN!
(i was gna add a bunch of revealing stuff, but... i shall be nice, since this IS the net=p heh)
but oh well, illll try to extend this thing further than what it already is. hmmmm...........
oh yea! HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR EVE!(:
omgosh what am i resorting to!=p oh well, may the year of the cute little fat pig be filled with fortune and happiness for all of you... and er...(oh gosh isnt a blog like a diary... its becoming like some announcement and wishes thingy... im getting quite retarded.)
but anw, my new year resolution is to.. NOT EAT TOO MUCH CHINESE NEW YEAR GOODIES. i dun want to suffer a WORSE mass pe, though im sure they are already preparing for one hell of a torture.. when we get back. btw my hands are still aching.sickening, and today feels like a sunday, cos yest felt like asat, with band and all, then dinner, and then after that today whole day home, feels like a sunday.. but i know its not
and theres reunion dinner tonite, i cant wait seriously! the fooooddd is always sooooo goooddd=p and tmrs theres visiting, meaning early monring.boo. thinking about it makes me tired already..haha. im hoping that i will haf the discipline to do my work as well, cos theres lots to catch up with, and there is a reason why everyone calls me mugger-.-
goooooddddbyeeeeeee!~howiwishiclddothingsritennotalwaysscrewthingsuphowiwishicldhelpnnotwatchhelplesslybythesideasthingsgowrong
[em]ily_ 11:39 AM
Friday, February 16
i wish i knew how my brain works like.
[em]ily_ 8:42 PM
Saturday, February 10
hallos ppl! yup got back my results already! i dun want to put it here cos im gna get suaned i just know it-.- after today. yup as annoying as it sounds.. it no longer seems that great to me anymore, cos now, im more worried about juggling my jc life nicely, with tutorials piling up and working piling up..pw is coming too-.-tests, practicals, and lectures, late nites n d stuff.. anw
HAPPY BIRTHDAY ERJIE!
(: haha, today had band photoshoot. kinda tiring, dunno why.haha, kinda chagged me the entire day, and who the hell stepped on my basslcar mouthpiece, cos thanks alot for crushing my reed, tho yes i admit, tis purely my fault, cos i left it there in the first place.thats why im damn frickng pissed with myself-.- kinda slacked at sectionals..which..aiya...shit lah, tosca is so screwed for me, icant keep up=( and all the weird overblows that is screwing my alto up.ARGH. but oh well.. im cool. im cool. march by tuesday! WHAT THE DIE.some how some how..that.. tral of running notes, and all the rest, i better self a bit on monday...
aand im so buying acs uniform tmr. FINALLY. im like.. in acjc! finalyyyyyy, its been like since like whaat..primary school? since like then ive been like wantint to be in.. and now like., FINALLY. like. yes! im in! finally! my dreams finally coming true! haha.
sing ACS forevermore, our ACS forever!~
i hope, i can like somehow survive jc life, and like,cope and stuff..alevels...here i come man..i need to start brushing up, nad catching up alr. tmr got lots of work to dooo.haha..workworkwork
oh wellll... i tink my blazer is too big for me, and the skirt too, makes me look fat.=( haha.. oh welllllll, i hopwe all the photos i look okkk like not fat or anything=p the blazers big after alll....
er... i dunno what else to update lah...omoghs... im like losing the habit of blogging..nooo... =( oh well sent in JAE application alr.. 22S and 22A.as long as 22! can alr, but yea, sci..better lah.=p
err, im struggling for words.. so i shall give up.lalala.. i need to work! n slp..and stuff. haha.im happy cos most of the ppl can stay...
ok thats it
REALLY CANT COME UP WITH ANYTHING ELSE.=(
i know i know, i suck. ok i give up!=p
goodnite folks, takecares, and rmb, always look forward to the future, not the past(:
toodles!~
the best is yet to be~
but for us...the best is..NOW (:
[em]ily_ 11:00 PM
Monday, February 5
heyyyy. RESULTS ARE COMING OUT ON FRIDAY AFTER 230PM for those who dun know. i dun tink ill be able to come online anymore before then, so in case such an occurance occurs, emily would like to wish everyone who is receiving results, who knows her and she knows you, and/ or if you're just passing by, ALL THE BEST FOR YOUR RESULTS and may you all get into your dream jc aft JAE. and your dream results too(: especially to all the acband j1s, all those who've been coming for band, i RELALY hope you all will stay on aft JAE, yupps, unless that isnt part of yyour intentions in the first place, which i hope not.
oh tmrs crescent concert too, i still dunno whether i can go, but, to all my dear crescent juniors, ALL THE BEST YEA. play music and magic and not just notes. but more imptly just haf fun, and everything SHOULD work out in the end, i am here pressuming htat you all DID work hard lah. which im sure you did..rite?=p
oh nad thanks to my class angel KS for the hitsugauya!=p
andand... err.. yea! JOELS HAIR SO COOL NOW. IF YOU HAFNT SEEN IT.QUICK GO SEE.
:P
ok gtg lots of work, lots of stuff...im so tireddddd. but i will keep persevering nad holding on...
toodles!~
[em]ily_ 7:17 PM
Sunday, February 4
HALLO(: i am proud to say i lasted yest, though i almost died. but sam should be more tired, so if she survived, then whats mine to compare with hers=p yay for sam! haha yup yest had band, roman festival the whole day. but a bit of festive overture. contra alto the whole day, double chair the whole day. oh gosh, i stuck out like a sore thumb. and my feet hurt cos i had to rest it on my foot. its either i rest it on my foot, or i carry it. i wonder which one i wouldve choosen=p but yest had batch outing, where we climbed the gate as a batch. so cool.hahaha.and where we dragged out eugene in between the gate.=pHAHA. and all the crazy insane-ness nad stuff=p yuppp. then that was just friggin tiring. and confusing. roman festival, somehow confused me.. oh welll, 91 bars rest.quite cool.lol
then after that my batch ppl rushed off to see sams concert! haha. it was so funny, first, sheree couldnt get on the train so she was the only whomissed it, cos the train was damn fricking crowded. then me jef sarah justin nad stuart got off at queenstown, and waited for ehr, then we got on her train. then later. we talktalktaltk. and misse dour stop-.- then we took back.LOL
hahaha, anws. im thankful i did NOT bump into HER that day. thank heavens. :p
after concert we went for dinner, cos we din haf time for it before concert.first we went macs, then it was crowded so we went bk, it was closING. nad thus we returned to macs. then i ate. ohgosh, i still prefer zinger=phee. yupyup. then time to go time to go, and thie horror movie started.
ok me nad tim were like rnning allll the way to esplanade to catch 700.under the bridge thingy had scary chinese newyear lanterns-of humans ,both me nad sige were like.. DUN LOOK DUN LOOK.haha. then we finally got to the busstop time check12mn. then we missed last bus.then better still rushed to cityhall, then the esplanade stuck.closed wth. then nevermind, getting screwed by parents sucked-.- ergh, then ok, gotaxi stand it sucked lah. no taxi, then tims mum saved me and sent me home. i swaer i was damn traumatised.-.-
oh well. ok igtg eat lunch now. seeyou ppl soon!
anw from the song from yest!
LO-V-E Lyrics-Nat King Cole
L is for the way you look at me
O is for the only one I see
V is very, very extraordinary
E is even more than anyone that you adore can
Love is all that I can give to you
Love is more than just a game for two
Two in love can make it
Take my heart and please dont break it
Love was made for me and you
L is for the way you look at me
O is for the only one I see
V is very, very extraordinary
E is even more than anyone that you adore can
Love is all that I can give to you
Love is more than just a game for two
Two in love can make it
Take my heart and please dont break it
Love was made for me and you
Love was made for me and you
Love was made for me and you
toodles!~
[em]ily_ 11:21 AM
Thursday, February 1
hellos. admittedly very tired..and bummed out today cos im tired. and mass pe din help, nad hafing my monthly best friend who is comign to visit me soon isnt helpful either.
anw, im quite pissed about smth. but i dun relaly want to sue names, so ill just basically whine and say that..even if we're still"kids"sometimes, you should think about what you are doing too. about what you're saying. about what your words could do.. joking nad making fun...is a normal habit,esp of guys. but you know.theres a limit. theres..a limit. nad theres certain times you should just watch your mouth.or you could jolly well be screwing someones elses life.and not just one..but many.you may not realise it..im thankful that i din charge and almost kill someone.cos i almost did. and tankfully i was stopped. cos if not, ill prob be in the principal office nad on the news in a flash.. oh well. girl tries to assault another student.headline news. violence. haha.
but i tink, itll end up in screams. im to tired to poke anyone, as ppl like godwin found out. and stanford too, and gladys, and enjia who saw me almost "faint"=pand pretty much everyone found out emilypooi was so not in a mood of poking others, cos she felt like a lump of spasming shit who was gonna faint any moment.yea nad i got whacked ont he head alot today..irealised. with a ruler with the bicycle spoke nad stuff.
ok dinner now. im damn tired..argh i hope i wont screw up physics test tmr.
and my dad screaming at me for no reason. isnt helping
seeya
[em]ily_ 7:03 PM
Monday, January 29
sometiems, i wish i was nobody. then ill be perfect. yay.:P
ok that was just a line of crap. ignore it.
workworkwork. results are coming out! ahhhhh!!
oh gosh im soo tired nad busy i haf no idea wat else to lbog about.. i tink if someone just left me at the qmroom couch, ill just sleep, for days, and days and days.boooooo. and last nites nightmare was SO NOT FUNNY. cos its the second time i dreamt that, and it was freaky. cos i almost died without saying goodbye to anyone! oh gosh. ok i hope i dream of nothing tonite, and no night mares. booo. and i most certainly dun want to start dreaming about. watever work im doing before i sleep. i sued to be able to do that, it sucked., those sleeps the worst nad most unfulfilling useless sleep ever.
anw im gna get godwin a buffer for his birhtday
seeya!(:
You And Me-lifehouse
What day is it? And in what month?
This clock never seemed so alive
I can't keep up and I can't back down
I've been losing so much time
Cause it's you and me and all other people with nothing to do
Nothing to lose
And it's you and me and all other people
And I don't know why, I can't keep my eyes off of you
All of the things that I want to say just aren't coming out right
I'm tripping on words
You've got my head spinning
I don't know where to go from here
Cause it's you and me and all other people with nothing to do
Nothing to prove
And it's you and me and all other people
And I don't know why, I can't keep my eyes off of you
There's something about you now
I can't quite figure out
Everything she does is beautiful
Everything she does is right
Cause it's you and me and all other people with nothing to do
Nothing to lose
And it's you and me and all other people
And I don't know why, I can't keep my eyes off of you
You and me and all other people with nothing to do
Nothing to prove
And it's you and me and all other people
And I don't know why, I can't keep my eyes off of you
What day is it?
And in what month?
This clock never seemed so alive.....
(:
[em]ily_ 7:27 PM
Sunday, January 28
boooo.. i relaly hate going home every ntie feeling like i hafnt slept in a year! i want to stay up at nite to do work an dstuff, but no matter how much i try it never works. i fall back to sleep wham. and then shitshit, tutorials not done, and anw, chara did say "you look like the guai mugger type" so no matter how i shall live up to myname. but here i am dying each and every nite i come home-.-
haha, yest had games, kinda fun, but a bruise kinda popped out of no where now-.- captains ball was kind of fun! hahaha, and well that cold glove wasnt fun. ill say so honestly.hahahaha. running around going crazy... oh welll. street netball was kind of fun too. hahaha, pity i missed mass dance, stupid enjia tricked me. boo. haha, oh well, dinner was damn funny too lah, bryant and his dear elmo.hahahaha. and all the rubbish things, super funny.
going cny shopping later, shall look for my addidas school shoes, i want that pair of shoes. i liked it so much! haha. but oh well, i bet wont haf my size lah. then i want new clothes! and and a new bag to bring to school, i scared to spoil my current mickey one that i love alotlaot(not that i love mickey that much btw.)
and tutorials TUTORIALS. hist, chem, maths, chinese, (luckily i finished phy LONG TIME AGO.) ahhhhhh. ok shall rushrush now.haha. seeyaaaaaaaaaa
anw, MI now sounds like an officially scary school to go too-.-
toodles!~
PERHAPS LOVE (John Denver)
Perhaps love is like a resting place, a shelter from the storm
It exists to give you comfort, it is there to keep you warm
And in those times of trouble when you are most alone
The memory of love will bring you home
Perhaps love is like a window, perhaps an open door
It invites you to come closer, it wants to show you more
And even if you lose yourself and don't know what to do
The memory of love will see you through
Love to some is like a cloud, to some as strong as steel
For some a way of living, for some a way to feel
And some say love is holding on and some say letting go
And some say love is everything, and some say they don't know
Perhaps love is like the ocean, full of conflict, full of pain
Like a fire when it's cold outside, thunder when it rains
If I should live forever, and all my dreams come true
My memories of love will be of you
Some say love is holding on and some say letting go
Some say love is everything and some say they don't know
Perhaps love is like the mountains, full of conflict, full of change
Like a fire when it's cold outside, thunder when it rains
If I should live forever, and all my dreams come true
My memories of love will be of you..........
http://www.romantic-lyrics.com/lp4.shtml
ps: my bro is buying lotslotslots of clarinet stuff.-.- oh gosh, rich ass
[em]ily_ 10:15 AM
Thursday, January 25
hallo! i survived MASS PE! cos it was only level one after all. and i AM starting to feel the muscle cramps coming. oh well see lah, never excercise. now like that. and omgosh, after pe, i had SPASMIC fingers. and i had physics pract. reading the vernier callipers was like crap!like fingers *shivershiver* eyes*squintsquint* and it was seriously annoying-.-
ok so far ive been surviving life. tiredly. haha. admittedly i AM quite tired. buttttttt, exhaustion can always be pulled through one lah. but its annoying when your fingers are still slightly spasmic, amazing how i could practise my bass just now-.- tutorials tutorials..rushing to classes, freezing in lectures. sleeping in lectures, eating candies.hanging with my classmates. going qm room, practing my instru.. lifes getting back into the normal way of life. hectic as it is. works gonna increase soon. and concerts and performances are coming uip. i hope i can keep up and not die...LOL
yayy, my class rocks.hahaha. lessons and stuff are quite fun cos we go as a class. :P like for example today physics lecture was fun cos we were passing around gummies.HAHA.it was entertatingin to pass stuff around.haha! then we were like busy massaging each other. and getting scolded for being late, tho its not our fault-.- criticising teachers that nag too much, and laughing at jokes that u dun noe we came up with(cos you wont want to know.) hahaha. sb8! we rock!(: [you're granite,hes basalt...shes...magma!=p]
my class wants to go swimming on monday...hahaha, oh man swimming, i tink its time i caught up with taht. i hafnt swam in ages, wonder if i still can swim..hahaha.. oh welllllll=p
ok anw i gtg now lala.
todays an impt day! hee. if you dunno why, means you're not involved so pretty much.hahaha. happy to those who know it! hahahaha! okkkkkkkk time to go eat dinner. seey a around ppl and takecares! drink more water!
toodles!~
[em]ily_ 7:20 PM
Monday, January 22
*the resurrection of the dead blog*
whee. its aliveeeeeee!!!
hahaha, ok sorry for the late update for those as curious of my life as pohshuzhen... but ive been really busy with tutorials, band, lectures, and just hanging around. and by the time i come home, my bros home and using the copm.so yay. there goes the copm.hahaha. ok so sorry yeaps. but thers nothing much to blog about seriously.my lifes been pretty simple.[well excluding the existence of you in my life=p] mmhmmm...
lets seeeeeeee....oh my class is pretty cool!(: i like.hahaha. fun ppl, hopefully we'll get to click more in the future. and then it'll be really cool.hahaha.yay.im thanking heavens im not the chinese rep, which i almost got saboed into. can you imagine, ME, emily pooi ming li, the one who sucks in chinese, being chinese rep. omgosh.hahaha! it'll be damn hliarious lah!
ok yay, lets upate on my teahcers so far. my gp teachesr julia lye, quite ok, SO FAR. i dun want to make too much, conclusions, but so far, she seems ok? then maths is this crazy old man mr lim. its damn sick, i refuse to sit in the first row now. its damn sick. but hes damn funny. he laughs at his own jokes. and he talks tons of rubbish.hahaha.chem teahers julie eng. i swear, if she continues being as naggy as she is, i relaly pity her future students when she gets older. phy teacher is ms lim(my form teahcer btw) as naggya s she is, she seems like a pretty good teacher, and when shes not nagging shes actually quite nice lah.soooo, i decided to give her another cahnce!(: ahahaha.my chinese teacher laoshi, who doesnt want to tell us her name, but wants us to go find out for ourselves. shes damn ncie(: hahahaha. i like her already.hahaha but stillllll
i miss my crescent teachers. some of them at least. i miss... hafing physics teachers and laughing at tantans sacarstic remarks. i miss rolling on my sides during social studies whenever the tsar tells ehr her lame jokes. i miss history lessons with good ole mrs leo, who i reallyrelaly adore.i miss sweet mrstan and her amaths lessons, and her exasperation at the way we do our sums. i miss..mrs gek and her broom, and her kindness nad sweetness.. and eccentricness... i miss laoshi... SO MUCH. i miss life increscent quite a bit.. all the teachers, adn my class...
buttttt oh well! life in ac is not bad too, and travelling from class to calss, is quite fun.hahaha. wakes you up. it ink, im...sorta hadling life well...hmmm..=p
i swear word spresads like fire. like especially after dr lee found out0.0 oh wlellllllllll(:
with you by my side, i feel no hesitation when facing my fears(:
thanks so much for being there with me this past few days.... (:
anw. HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO SHEREE AND CAROL!!!
haf a smashing 17th birthday! and.... another great year ahead.(:
okkk.. i wonder whens the next time you'll hear from me. so till then dun miss me yea.heehee. see yaaaaaaaaaa(:
and ppl! TAKE CARE DRINK MORE WATER!(especially you lah!=p) theres like a flu bug going around.(: so yeap, takecares!(:
[em]ily_ 10:14 PM
Thursday, January 11
hallloooo, i guess i hafnt been here for ages. ok lah its just a few days! its just that everytime i come home, ill be like..aiya..what to blog about ah? aiya forget it, too tired to tink liao lah.hahaha. and other times im back really late, or my bros using the comp.
wellll not to say that rite now i haf anything to talk about anyway. but! ill try my best! haha. but gawd.. im like how shag rite now.hahaha. i haf to write out the entire festive overture for contraalto, actually i dun haf to, i just feel like doing so.hahaha. i got some time anw. then i haf to speed read all three sets of lecture notes for lecture tmr.hahaha. ok emily! time to oil the half dead brain of yours, and start being the "mugger" you were. at least its better than the one slacking like shit over the longgggg holidays( which i thoroughly enjoyed! )ahhhh. i must oil my brain seriously.hahaha
ok so far introductory lectures are... soso. the chem teachers are pretty boring, hist teacher is cool, but not the SEA one, shes freaky, and she really gives me the goosebumps, i dunno why.hahaha.yuppp.... but my most confirmed is- pcmh+gp+chi
stupid teacher at registration just wont give me a break on choosing hist. he kept saying how impt geog was, must've been a geog teacher, sorry sir. im a hist enthusiast through and through. so forget your talk. i din absorb anything at all. hahaha
yea then the lectures notes queus really suck! its so long! me michelle and edwin were waiting for so freaking long. then like er..yea! hahahaha. after taht me,michelle,edwina and u jin ran off for health talk. luckily i was there cos needed attendence.hahaha. and i had to take it.hahaha
yea, then after taht was some student data thingy. i hafnt grown and im heavier now-.- boo. but im still acceptable weight, according to the minus 100 theory.hahaha. phew.i need to maintain my weight. seriously.hahaha.yupp..
then after school i had some og time, we started playing murdere at the cafe.hahaha. the first time i pretended to be the murderer, adn that helped me in the second time. but i still lost eventaully, i was confusing enjia like shit.HAHA.oops=p okko im evil! but its ncie to be evil once in a whlie.and aveil! poke my head so hard!hahaha then we played concentration at the bleachers. so funny. munkit started increasing the speed like crazy! hahahaha.wahlao
like suddenly! was damn crazy.hahaha yup
after that went for self pract. but in the end i din self, cos i wasnt gna lug my contra alto allll the way to the sports complex. so i ended up just doing fingerings for the songs. and transposing festive overture.hahaha.from contrabass to contra alto! ahahaha. for those who dnno, im officailly playing three instruments, the contra alto, the alto and the bassclarient. but i still intend to call myself a bassclarienttist.thankyou. haaha. and when the contra bass comes. then yea. four instruments. so cool.hahaha
yup. then i went home, dying nad super shag.went with sam and enjia. then saw renard at the mrt station. nu ren lah. i couldnt resist,hahaha
yuppp. ok i should start the work which i really haf no mood to start on. but i will i can i will jisyou!hahaha.=p yuppp.... tmr lgot four lectures. dman sian. but sits ok! i hope i rmb to pay sports complex fees tmr!hahaha. and theres MUTS tmr. i dunno how to stone in between whether to go og, to go band pract or to go back to crescent for cca day! hahaha. see how lah.
oh welllllllll im super tired! but theres work to do! and i shall be guai! or at least attempt to be! so jiayou!(:
toodles!~
[em]ily_ 5:13 PM
Monday, January 8
helloo... introductory lectures... are ok. hahaha. lets seeeeee... i hadddd... maths which was ok, cos there mwere a few jokes here and there which you could only notice if you listened.hahaha.
errr... KI rocks lah, i relaly want to take, but it sounds damn intimidating, but also damn fun! see how, my mum is like trytrytry. so its all safe, phew, i thought she'll be pissed or smth. but oh well! may i get to ki!(: hahaha.
thennnn i went for..... *thinks*
was it econs? i tink so. the guys damn funny! but i dun relaly liek econs.LOL
thennnn.... gp was ok... er...
physics so boring, i tink ill prob not take it anymore. see how bad bio is first, then compare and contrast...
chem sounds ok to me.. so yep pretty much..
probably...bcmh+ki
see how? hahaha.
yep..super tired today... my dizzy spells are back, i guess i really need a lot of rest, adn energy now.hahahaha. yuppp.a nd my nose is peeling, its so gross.HAHA
okkk im too tired now, yup.seeyou then.hahaha
(:
[em]ily_ 5:19 PM
Sunday, January 7
BEHEMOTHS!(:
left, go left, go left right! AC! left, go left, go left right! AC! who'd you wanna be a! AC WARRIOR! who'd you wanna be a! AC WARRIOR! how far? ALL THE WAY! half way? NO WAY. any sweat? NO SWEAT, CHICKEN FEET, HAHA, ALL THE WAY! (:
my favourite cheer for the words, but in terms of coolness dynamite rocks more.haha. but yea, no point typing it down, its all about the image man, the image.hahaha. yup im pretty spent rite now, i haf like one ugly, i dunno, scratch? on my left leg(and someone nicely stepped on it during dance yest. omgosh...OW.) and i haf a new blister on my little toe on my right. i haf a few minor scratches here and there, which i dun notice at all.a disgusting collar, specs and sleeve and shorts tan line. and a horrible sunburn on my scarp. buttttttt its ok! COS IT WAS FUN ANW!
just a pity that because of my injury i could not wallow in the mud and slide down the soap slide=( haha. yea, on day 2 starch went into the wound or smth like that. and day3 it was white with 5 red dots, so on day 3 i told myself no more dirty games. i was SUPER ANNOYED with this wound. grrrr. i just HAD to get it on day1.-.-
buuuttttt ignoring the downside! there was great weather! and thats why im as dark as charcoal. and only at the spots beyond the tan line-.- the games were damn fun! damn cool. and watching ppl get taupoked in the mud and get "bathed" in the pool, and getting soaked in bombs and pouring water all over each other. it was.. interesting and fun lah!=p
but yea, now my voice is hoarse from four days, its an honour to ose my voice.haha.all the cheers and the screaming, its quite hilarious. esp for me. cos i was busily screaming, my high,high, high, high, highhhhh pitch loud scream. erif sent ppl to challenge me on day 3. it was funny lah. hahaha, munkit had to like, "time out!" us.LOL. well, there was the super high charged, scream. which made me quite stick outish. and durin games cheer, when we were supposed to do the super irritating cheer (cos its 3 octaves higher than the original. which has one part thats already freaking high) i was told to go farfar away.hahahaha.
my clan and og rocks of course! GO EARFALAS(e-a-r-f-aaaaaaaaaaa!) and BEHEMOTH!(don't be a butterfly, be a moth! dun be a butterfly be a moth! gogogogo BEHEMOTH!) but more than ever, AC ROCKS! never regreted m choice, and my decision.(which was actually made aeons ago.haha) yea man. go ac!(:
everyone in my og rocked too! (HAHA all the guys are scared of my scream adn poke now.HOHOHO) the guys are cool and the girls are hot. and that makes us justttttt rite!(: hahaha. wheeeee. cheering in this og is damn power! hahaha.
and dancing. hahaha its damn hilarious. solo dance is ok, i can get it, sort of.hahaha.i can finally do the squiggy leg thingy. and singsingsing part is so fun! haha. couple dance is just as hilarious. at the actual thing itself i kept getting the swirl in dancedance swirl out part wrong, cos basically i forgot.hahaha. not caring about whoever i was dancing with, hahaha. and yea the earlier years ones are hard, cant dance, chris and clarissa tried to teach us, we could do a litttllllleeeee bitttt. but i know i suck at dancing, so i cant do it.haha.=p
hmmmmmm.... yea. so thanks to ALL THE OGLS, and everyone of helped to make this orientation rock so much, and making us feel so at home. special thanks to BEHEMOTHS! (we're not butterflies!) i love you all man! and SARAH, GUOXI and DHANUJ our dear OGLS!(: and of cos, CHRIS AND CLARISSA our dear j3s!!!! you all rock!!!!(:
yuppp.. so wheeeeee, schools starting.-.- the lecture thingy starting next week. yup, and lots of other stuff.hahaha.(: wheeee. go ac! hahaha. i was alittle high after campfire yest, but then again, iwas hafing some probs, so sorry to en, lijin and sam who had to bear with my slow walking(which was made worse considering both feet had injuries). yupp! sorrryyyy.
so yay for ACJC orientation 2007! it rocked!(:
thanks alot!(:
uprobnvknewbtttmademefeelinsignithurts
[em]ily_ 9:29 AM
Monday, January 1
yea, yesterday was like my family's party for me and for christmas and stuff. yea kinda fun. oh man fishballs were damn ncie lah. like omgosh. damn good stuff.hahaha. er anw i tink i shall do my thanks first, then yea toodles!~
thanks to.....
lydia jie,jeffrey kor and aunty betty for the precious moment figurine and the card
daniel kor and james kor for the large black mokona!(: hahaha so cute nad fat!
daniels and james parents for the earrings!
chuanwei and family for the bilabong bag!!(:
and alll the angpaos! haha.(:
yupp thansk alot(:
yea. after fighting alot playing alot. it was a good day, my cake looked like..it was coverd in egg, cos itwas like a crepe and stuff.ahaha, yea. im getting my new sim card later. im hoping my OGL smsed me or smth. cos i reallyreallyreallyreally want to know my OG NOW.haha. yea.
so till later
heres a pict!
[em]ily_ 10:40 AM
Sunday, December 31
i know im early, cos tonite, i need early nite! EARLY SLEEP. i need sleep.haha
yea so HAPPY NEW YEAR PEEPS. may you haf a brilliant new year with wonderful happenings, and all your wishes, come true...
take care of yourselves. and jiayous always. and..
HAPPY NEW YEAR!(:
lots of love emily(:
[em]ily_ 8:39 PM
Saturday, December 30
hallo peeps. before i continue yest was isabel bday, my dear little junior, so me and gen! the half eaten cake, drinks and rubbish study corner.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ISABEL(: (and to me of cos.)
and of cos, todays dear aisyahs birthday, to the one who keeps callingm e emi lie
HAPPY BIRTHDAY AISYAH!(:
and next, thanks for all the wellwishes and birthday presents and rmbing that yes, yest was my bday!
ok, firstly on the 27th which was jamtty chalet, ill like to thank the entire gang for all the loving care and celebrations, thanks tim for baking the cake, and thanks for the hat and everything else(i get realllllyyy mixed up with my birhtday and chrismtas presents, so ill take it that the hat was my bday gift and everything else i got were chrismtas presents?)
ok then on the 28th for lunch thanks gen for hafing lunch with me and buying cake for me(along with sam), and stoning at starbucks with me, thatnks alot gurl, you rock(:
ok then on the 29th, thanks sam but no thanks for trying to dump me INTO the pool. but that din work at all as you can see. and dinner from my dad and family(:
then thanks for the presents!
the addidas wallet from my bro.
the evening bag from my parents .
the urahara hat from jamtty .
the music jacket, handphone keychain, tsubasa poster and melty kiss chocolates from sam.
the skinnie wallet and treble clef hair clip form gen.
the stuffed horse,card,melty kiss chocolate from you.
the mokona eychain from sheree.
the pretttyy earrings from xinyan.
i relaly hope i din forget anyone..sorry if i did.
and then heres thanks for all the wellwishes, considering i was at acband chalet, i guess ill simply say thansk to all those from ac who said a simple happy birthday to me, really appreaciate it. [because i dun tink i saw anyone esle who would like just wish me happy birhtday face to face wat.]
and heres thanks to the calls from jeanette and liuqing and you.
and to the smses!
sheree
ruth
xinyan
my dad
isabel
meiling
tim yeo
james
amanda
yuhyiing
nabs
meiying
kailing
nurul
tim chua
gen
jeremy
yupps. and thanks for the tags, and the friendster testimonials. nad yea for everything peeps. for the entire thing, you all made my day special(:
anww, time to update you all about, acband chalet! yay
erm.... ok lets start from the 28th, i met up with gen for lunch, yupp, then we went to ajisen, and ended up damn full, then like she bought me cake! SO COOL.hahaha thanks gen those cakes really rocked, and yea thanks sam too cos like its partly from you rite? haha, yea, then later we went to bum at starbucks at wisma, nice bumming chairs.hahaha. yea and sam was like kinda like coming over soon, yea. then in the end we went to meet her at orchard mrt lah, yea. hahaha, then gen went home. then sam and me went to pasir risyup, then later at pasirris, stuart little, jefri, enjia, sam and me, went off to like hansels house area, actually only me and sam needed to go, cos we needed to settle like some stuff, but oh wells, everyone came along in the end.haha. yea and i swear my money got cheated off me at the busstop. i like so din dare to say no to that like guy lah, i swear it was a ripoff, but, he was damn like scary lah, i freaked out. i tink that busstop is a damn scary place, cos liek apparently whileme,en and sam got like "attacked" by some weird gangster guy for donations, jefri and stuart had to handle some gangster who was like accusing them of some weird thing. and apparently almost like beat them up for it.freaky lah pasir ris.haha
yea, then we like walked through like the storm, its quite retarde,the girls wanted to walk in the rain, and the guys took out like umbrellas.hahaha. man the rain felt good.hahaha. yea, then we sat at the like study corner and while me and sam settled like the christmas presents, which eventually we din give out, cos we were like damn lazy to-.- yea, the other three were like mugging.hahaha. yea, then after that, me, en,jefri and stuart went off to the chalet. yea then, we like kinda bummed there, walked around and stuff, and yea eugenes like damn fun to poke, but hes too scary cos, like he keeps kicking, but h well, nvm. i shall persevere, and try not to get killed along hte way=p hahaha.yea, then sam appeared again, then me, en and sam took our bikes and cycled to like costa sands to see crescent chalet.haha, wahlao hardly anyone were there, damn sad lah. yea so like after like poking fun of others, we went to grab something to eat, cos my gastric was like killing me, and yea, then we went back. we forgot to turn, adn then like we went past some really freaky house. *shudders* i dun want to tink about that place anymore, scary. haha. then we went back, and dr lee was there,and just when he was like gna test us, me,and sam were like going off to send enjia off,yea. haha
which is true ok!
haha. but apparently i missed liek alot of fun, cos of the dunking and all.haha.darn.=p oh wellllll(:
yea, then i kinda like got scratched cos i accidentally crushed adelenes card box, sorrry adelene.hahaha. yea, then me and sam had like alonggg walk back, yea.im sorry for like anything yea sam?buuudddiiessssss(: then like errr..yea, we tried to walk the scary dark park, but my guts failed us.hahaha. oh well, yup, then we went back and hung around at the pool damn fun. and run away from cats, i swear that place has like tons of cats lah! gross.haha. then sam tried to dunk me when it turned liek midnite. like wth. started splashing each other.hahaha. damn funny.haha, yea, then when jefri came back, we decided to go like cycling. as agreed.haha. then like the three of us cycled around like pasiris, went to eat at some like 24hour coffee shop, adn then we decided to go back after that instead of continuing, cos i was tired. and sam was tired, and yea.hahaha. then we went back to the like chalet.haha then sam went to wait for liyun or smth, then i went walking cos my someone called, yea. haha then i walked walkedwalked, and reach the like aprk near white sands or smth. like damn fun walking at nite.haha the fish pond thingy was damn cool too lah. watch otehrs fish. then i liek kinda sat there for along time, yea. it was a nice place(: and i was like starting to doze off laot..then when like the palce started to get bright, i finally got unlazy and moved my lazy ass up, and startedheading back to like the chalet. yea, i tink that was like a dman peaceful way to start like my 16th year..haha.
yea, then i was like damn shag lah.then i went to like rest for a bit in the room, and joel was like talking alot of crap.haha. yea, then after a while, went to the pool again, then started worrying over the bikes nad stuff,haha. then huilin me and jefir went off with the bikes, so no one else could borrow it, and that we could like return it like asap. hahaha yea, then after taht i stoned at the table while watching the very entertaining game of like heart attack.hahaha.yea, then after a while sam came back from crescent chalet.haha, yea, then the sec 4s had to go off, im sorry, i din noe the timings of like the one at pasirris and the one at aloha loyang were so different.hahaha. oops. yea, then we started waiting in the sun by the poolll. damn hot.haha, then this big group of us(huilin,sheree,edwin,michelle,sean,bingjian,zhanwei,eugene and me) went off. yea and sheree cabbed back, adn we went home by the longggggg dreaded mrt, lucky me for 190 if not ill never get home.yea, then i dragged myself to meet my mum to eat at a coffee shop. then after that only after taht! i finally went home, to sleep. to bathe. to chill.
yea. like i fell aslp for a teeny while, and i was like shaken awake. i was like NOOOOO.hahaha, yea, then i went out for dinner with my family, travelled to like suntec, jiayi should be proud o fme like i wore heels like she recommends! im so guai lah.hahaha. listen to her. yea. but it was so pain and uncomfortable, i truly understand why i dun wear heels out to shop, i wont last a second.
haha yea, but i was like so tired to eat lah.haha darn, and i kinda like sizzler soups, and stuff, but i was too tired to eat. then after that nice dinner, we kinda left to send my bro to camp for duty(comp the wohle day today! YEA.) then me and my mum had to wait outside the camp so that my dad could like drive my bro all the way in.haha, yea. then finally we went home. i was like half alsp on the car, but by the time i reached home i wasnt as tired anymore.haha.yea i stayed up quite late infact.(: hahah.. so now, im still tired, and lunch is so not appetizing.hahaha. im suppose to like this lah! but yea, im not hungry,a dn im too sleepy to eat man.hahaha
oh well, thanks everyone this birthday so rocked.hahaha. yupp, thansk everyone.(:
ok i should resume trying to eat my lunch.haha. okkkk and i promise since everyoens hinting the same thing, ill try to girl-lify myself a bitttt mroe ok!=p haha. yeayea, ill try my best, really really.haha
seeya all soon! and some picts, too little to make a like, album so yea.haha
me and en soaked.
yea..its too beautiful it almost seem like a dream(:
[em]ily_ 10:39 AM
Wednesday, December 27
hallo, today was jametty "chalet" the reason for the "" is because we din actually go for a chalet even tho we booked one at sentosa. we din go. the hut was apparently too small to live in. so the guys stayed over at tims house last ntie. so today we had fun in tims house*thanks tim parents for letting us insane freaks over*
yea the whole morining we spent playing in his moat. splashing, asnd singing like drunkards. with michael struggling with his guitar? HAHA
anw thanks guys for the like birthday cake and teh presents. it was a lot of ufn.yea.(: thanks alot man. you guys rock(: thanks for the creepy doll, for the mousey pen, for the teeshirt, for the hat, for the cake, for the fun, for the laughter. thanks alot.(:
yea after our funny acapella, and other rubbish, and getting splashed and stuff. yea then we whad our like... canadian pizza. so fun.hahaha then we went upstairs and cont singing, while papa, sange and sige played the ps. yea.damn fun.haha. singsing and play aroudn with the hats, anw for picts rite just go to my shutterfly account, the links below. in the post before. yea. i tink i should be able to be finished with it by tonie. i hope. pray i do=p
yupp... after all that we went out to town, while laoda went off first. yea, walk aroudn. then saw jefri and stuart at kino.haha. then we all continued, but we never made it to esplanade by foot. we gave up at heeren nad took a bus. but we never went esplanade, we hung around raffles place and sunteccity, ate at careffour. and yes, i love that new shirt man. orange.wheee
ok tmrs gna be another fun and tiring day, but it'll all be worth it.(: yea
please know, if you dun alr. its all over alrite. its all over. i dun want to start being more cruel then i alr am. but yea. im sorry, but thats fact and thats life.
[em]ily_ 8:49 PM
Tuesday, December 26
YES
jap photos are ready! i tink!
http://emilypooi.shutterfly.com/action/
look for the album of jap trip and thats it! yea!(: hahaha
[em]ily_ 9:25 PM
i admit! im the happiest girl in the world rite now.
sentosa tmr, chalets, etc, this week should be fun. haha
photos should be ready soon, im tinking of a new blogskin at this moment, dun think im gna use that pict anymore.hahaha. see hooooowwwwww....
till later then(:
[em]ily_ 11:33 AM
Sunday, December 24
hellow ppl, im a few mins early, but i dunno whether i can be on at 12, so MERRY XMAS PPL! may your new year be filled with bliss!(:
takkaires!
and to spoil your like anticipation, i intend touse this pict as my future blogskin! comments before i make it? 
thanks and seeya!
[em]ily_ 11:02 PM
Saturday, December 23
hellloo.. today... was... i dunno.. scary. i tink. i really hope that everyone cheers up...yupp.like i dunno, everyone was like so tired or so pissed or smth... so yea... hope you all kinda like jiayous, ya(:no problem is unsolve-able. yupp. and if you all are tired go get some rest(:
boo, i intend to change my blogskin soon cos i just drew smth nice.yay.haha.
i tink im damn hyper today thats way now im so tired.yawn.
and i totally forgot wat to say...
photos still on the way..
and sometimes i wish i wasnt so useless.
[em]ily_ 9:11 PM
Friday, December 22
hallo! i admit that im very lazy to update about my jap trip cos, honestly its alot.haha, and i tink my pictures can do the talking once im done with them.hahaha. so i guess ill just mention a few things and move on to jcband fest nad todays post. yup. SO JIAYOUS!
comments of japan trip... hmmmm.. firstly i konw you all missed me! COME ON ADMIT IT. hahaha, okok just joking, its just cos i sneezed alot, but i guess it was the weather. hahaha,
food was good, the first few days i ate like ALOT. but after like.. likelike the last few days my stomach screwed up like real bad, like chrunchurn then like diarrhoea.. darn lah. loss appetite a LITTLE, luckily a little only.haha. then... errrr...
weather was coolll as in really COOL.hahaha, like woahwoah, its like here in singapore, sun-RUN! wind-SHIOK! but in jap its like the complete opposite.haha. my bro and i like, SUN! run TO STAND UNDER THE SUN!!!!! hahaha. and like WIND! ARGHHH RUN AWAYYYYY
scenery was BEAUTIFUL. like mt fuji was damndamn pretty lah! then like the trees adn leaves nad flowers so pretty. wheee.
places of visit was so intriging. ramen museum was so cool! sanrio purioland/hellokitty land had nice designs. disney land was so cool! osaka castle at nite was pretty!shinsaibashi was mad!everywhere was damn cool!
interesting notes the signboards are interesting like siao! HAHA. adverts are damn retarded! ducks at disneyland are popcorn freaks. like really scarily popcorn freaks. deers haf round shit. haha
my bro passed on alot of retardedness shit on me-_-
and i wore a yukata! omgosh.
haha. anw.... photos will be up soon, hopefully! soooo sorry, but please wait ya(:
ok yest was jcbandfest. in the day i went to sams house.
ya ok i slept at 3 woke up at 9[my flight reached singapore at 1 plus reach home at 2 settle stuff by 3] went to bv to meet gen first. yup then went to sams house with gen first, after a while sheree came. then they watched tsubasa nad i did the presents stuff, which were tiring.hahaha. then after a longggg watch, we went out, gen went home, sheree,sam nad me took bus to city hall to meet er..g..shucks i dunno how to spell=p [SHEREEEE!!! HOW TO SPEELLLL] and huilin. yup ate at bk. crapped alot, grabbed chocos and rushed to esplanade. yup, i know my orange shirt is dam outstanding. haha i din fall aslp despite eing so tired! so cool can!okok rubbishrubbish, then ya listenlisten then see all the seniors nad stuff.(: then after taht i went home, bused with jiayi viviene and kor. took some really long ride. haha, yesyes jiayi, i know i should learn to dress up more.im trying im trying. but heels are so painful,baggy pants are more comfy than tight ones, and polos are the ebst! my long thick disgutiing neck cant handle collarless too well, tho i try. yup, reached home, was so tired, kinda slept almost immd aft looking through hols picts.
today went out with sam, gen and jefri to watch movieS. haha. first met jefri and sam atps to watch night at the musuem. i was early [earlier than the rest at least] and i went to buy tics it was damn funny cos i bought for NatM and for eragon for later. 7 tics lah! then this like huge lot of tics was churned out of hte machine! haha. after that jefri andsam arrived went to macs for breakfast, then went to watch. night museum DAMN funny! "KEEEPPP QUEITTTTTTT!!!!! my dumdum fren want to talk" hahaha.and like tons of other random and hilarious and ridiculous stuff. DAMN funny lah! i strongly recommend you all to watch! its damn cool too! like the sad hun,HAHA. yupp, then.... after the movie went to meet gen, then we went to yoshi for lunch, ok actually we all hardly ate, gen ate earlier but had soyabean milk, i had soayamilk,miso souo and chawan mushi, i dun like their chawan mushi. sam had onigiri nad gyoza, jefri din eat aynthing. but i was like damnARGH when the kani krackers spilled into my bag. like... NEW BAG! NICE KRACKERS! oh gosh. ok then we rushed up for movie. saw chuanwei at ps! so cool!ahaha. i was like CHUAN WEI!!! run hug. and the other three were like WTH is emily doing! hahahaha. chuan weis my cousin btw. haha then went to watch eragon. so many adverts, almost fell aslp. eragon was quiyte cool, but i tink, that the story line of the movie was too straight forward. and yes that fire guy is so gross. but, eragons cute! baby dragon and big dragon so cute! i wanna fly a dragon too! like roller coaster! haha. anw its like damn funny cos gen nad sam were like tellingm e that the authors like only 15 and i was like saying its better for kids who haf the talent to write fantasy cos of their rich imagination, not like the older oens without imagination or dun dare to use the imagination ppl. then they realised! IM STILL 15! so i still haf opportunity! hahaha. 7 more days! i must get inspiration! FASTFASTFSAT.hahaha. ok rubbish.=p yup, then we walked around bought presents for family at action city, then walked to music essentials, stuff too ex so din buy for daddee=( in the end went to buy chocs from sins at centre point, cos i was trying to rmb where to get godvia chocs, but since i couldnt rmb, i bought form sins instead. but then when we went to taka, there were godiva and bunch of other cooler chocs there=( haha nvmnvm, next time next time.hahaha. gen sam and me ate at pepper lunch.[damn weird, dinner at pepper LUNCH] then sam had to go for pract so she and gen took mrt and i bused home. yup, damn long ride, no seat.. damn sian. like it kept jerking and twisting nad stuff, ride so not smooth.darn.
anw my tummy is in real bad condition, like i cant eat, but im kinda hungry, but i cant eat, ill feel like puking watever i ate, and nothings tasty anymore too=( boo. and like..it keeps churning, and i keep feeling like puking, [no idiots im not pregnant! if im whos the father! my clothes?!-_-]
oh well.... yup its been real fun, ok tmrs band pract, gonna come with looks of sweets, santarina to the rescue.lol. sun is christmas eve! and then its christmas! and band pract! and jametty chalet and coda and ac chalet! im damn buisy! =p
oh wellll.. i promise the photos soon, but i dunno whehter i can use the comp for the next few days... so see how ok? i alr reduced like from 600plus to 400.haha. so should be faster? m,aybe? HAHA. okk.. yupp, so peeps til later! takkaires! and lest i haf no more opportunity(pray i do)
MERRY CHRISTMAS!(:
takkaires! ill be working on my new year resolutions soon.haha. yupp and before i go!
lyrics!~
Learn to be Lonely
composed by andrew loydl webber
Child of the wilderness
Born into emptiness
Learn to be lonely
Learn to find your way in darkness
Who will be there for you
Comfort and care for you
Learn to be lonely
Learn to be your one companion
Never dreamed out in the world
There are arms to hold you
You’ve always known your heart was on its own
So laugh in your loneliness
Child of the wilderness
Learn to Be lonely
Learn how to love life that is lived alone
Learn to be lonely
Life can be lived
Life can be loved alone
~
and yes.. ihatemyselfandistilldo
[em]ily_ 8:31 PM
Thursday, December 21
HALLO IM BACK FROM KAWAIINWHLAND/ SUSHI LAND
haaha, yupp lots to blog about butttt, later theni blog. and 600 photos... crazy stuff.hahaa. ill streamline them alot. anw at sams house now, will update you all soon!
so til then happy waiting!
toodles!~
[em]ily_ 12:32 PM
Friday, December 15
boo! HEYYYY at the airport rite now, free internet. so cool! HAHA going jap in like one hour?? in a way cant wait, but sitll hasnt like sunk in yet lah wth, ill try to rmb wat you all wated, try my best! hahaha, i know you all would miss me so i came to blog.HAHA. byebye(:
[em]ily_ 12:04 AM
Thursday, December 14
boo, going off soon.. ahhhhh, this is why i din want to miss band pract..theory! hahaha, im gna force lessons out of my brotehr later.
haha, takecares ppl, ee im missing you all already! hahaha. ookok, see ya soon! to the esniors! JIAYOUS FOR JC BAND FEST! esp nabi and your sop solo!=p hee
yuppp.... dun miss me too much, i tink it'll be damn colddd and ill sneeze enouigh dun make me sneeze anymore!=p
wish me luck! i still cant believe im going on holiday innlike...a few hours! hahaha.
byebye!
your ever hyper, ever crazy, ever lovable, ever blablablabala, ever egoistc
emily(:
[em]ily_ 6:11 PM
Wednesday, December 13
ive sent out the ecards(like you know emily cards?! HAHA) already, so if i haf your email chances is its in your inbox.
go check your inbox! if its not there dun be disappointed, no.1 is cos i had difficulty rmbing hus hu in the email list, secondly is cos i got mixed up, and thirdly is cos i forget to press send when i sent your card=p in which i would apologise greatly should any of these errors occured, but overall ,most of you should find it within your inbox. so rmb to go look. yup
and i know most of you say i dun nd to be scared, but i still am scared. tmrs posting, and no matter wat it worries me..(: i worry too much
[em]ily_ 2:50 PM
boo, please take note that ill be disappearing from this blog for about a week or so, from tmr nite onwards, ill only be back on the 20th late night,and the next comp ill see would prob be when i pop over at sams house on the 21st. so dun expect a update too soon, of cos ill try my best. but you know me.haha. ill try to bring stuff back but dun keep your hopes too high (:
yest was band pract, so i din really haf time to wish my clique a good ole happy anniversary! so
HAPPY BELATED ANNIVERSARY JAMETTY!!
haha. yupp, i know meiling said not to be so harsh on myself, but if im not harsh on myself, how can i ever improve, if im not harsh on myself, ill slack, if im not harsh on myself, ill never meet the mark, if im notharsh on myself, ill never even be able to eventually reach the stage where i can at least haf a glimpse of my bros back.if im not harsh on myself, ill live my life with regret.. cos this is probably the most impt thing to me ever.. (other than my studies) but ya... i want to make sure that at least.. i wont screw up at least one part of my life..yupp.
it was part of my memory that i threw to the corner, that i forced myself to live through and forget. i thought it was ok, cos anw, now i haf it, now i finally know what it was like, what i had missed. i thought ill forget it, but somehow, it still feels empty when otehrs talk about theirs so happily, and here i am, not hafing had the support others had, not hafing the smiles nd encouragement that they had, only the spite, the scorn, all which i tried to push away. but..i guess ill eventually get over it.
life is how life is now, and thats all that matters.yupp.
thanks for all my friends, that made my life feel like it mattered(:
so till later, dun miss me too much! ill try to bring back presents, takecare!(:
[em]ily_ 10:36 AM
Monday, December 11
yay. they changed our tourguide again.
this is the third one.
-_______-
annoying if you ask me.
anw im damn bored today, ive watched like wat.6 plus episodes of blood+ of cos i can watch more. but. lets see how.
i still cant believe they changed tourguide.AGAIN
[em]ily_ 4:59 PM
hmmm.. its good to know that my pms is slowly disappearing.-__- its been giving be a really bad time. but yest was fun(: morning, just spent on my finalfantasy.. lunch went to maysprings! yumyumyummmmm. hahaha, my bro and i both haf the "lets go eat at maysprings" face. haha.then after that sent kor to camp first, i couldnt go in, or rather it would be better if i dun go in, so i waited outside with my mum.
yup. then...aft that my dad,mum and me went off to orchard. my dad went straight to kino, mum followed me to OG, cos i needed to get those chocolates for my kor. then at the same time just looksee looksee. then after that went to john littles to look see look see. doesnt haf stuff that i really really wanted, so for once JL let me down.hahaha
then after that we were going to go to the urban warehouse thingy, walked past the "bookstore" just across the road fromJL. and bought a new book,myths. my latest hobby. but im not gonna go to into it, myths and religion, i know ill freak myself out as i get deeper. but then again ill see how(: so far i tink its cool.haha. yup
then instead of going to the urband warehouse thingy, we headed to kino, cos as i told my mum, you're comparing books and clothes. especially when i feel like getting a certain book. i wonder which one ill choose.haha.
saw that weird santaclaus clutching on to the "saxophone" at the dunno which bank .
reached taka, but din go to kino, decided ill walk back to the mrt and go off first, lest when i enter kino, ill end up stuck in there, and become terribly late.haha. so off i went. looked around as i walked, saw eileen at wisma! haha. yup. reached early, just stood there waiting and staring... into space.haha. yup then yy came, yay, so after giving her happyfeet stuff.hahaha. we went to gluttons bay...for our or luak!
there was a plate of stingray,charkwayteow and orluak, pity my appetitte wasnt that fantastic, if not it would not haf had been as much of a problem.haha. xy and nabi came for a short while, told you xy cant resist the orluak when its right in front of her.hahaha.
went in, then papa finally arrived, you owe us icecream, you were late. HAHA. and then saw papas juniors. so yy and i entertained eachother.hahaha. then saw jerel.hahaha. waited for some time, then later we entered the hall. me an dyy started exploring the "new" extension of the toilets, i dunno whether its new, or i just din notice it.hahaha. then we went back, and waited.haha
concert was quite good, beginning quite lame, dunno what they were waiting for at first, then after like this longggg silence, (a conductor,and the band were alr on stage) the mc finally announced "please rise for the national athem" i was like...riiiitee.hahaha. once octave lower turned out in mumblings.haha. anw sword and crown i like.HAHA. i like this first suite of eb they played, esp the third movement. the beginning note of the trill had just the right amount of emphsis, shiok.hahaha and the scary song, wasnt as scary as when i heard it in my kors room, i tink its cos the ppl were laughhing but i managed to freak erjie out abit with my story.hahaha. especially cos esplanade was all dark. then the stage looked a bit like a temple(in the dark), damn cool.hahaha. lala, but it wasnt as freaky as last time, kor says its cos the oboe wasnt flat enough.i dunnooo.haha. intermission went to pass chocolates to my brother(: erjie and i were entertaining ourselves with the "oniiiiiisamaaaaa" edition.
imagine i was falling in a pit
1."oniii"BOOM. "DARN, I FELL TOOFAST."
2. "oniisama!"*silence*BOOM "DARN I SAID TOO FAST"
3."onee! OH SH"BOOM "error error try again"
4."onee..NIIIII samm"BOOM "try again"
ya, for those"oniisama"is older brother and "oneesama" is older sister, anw its ok if you dun get it, we were high last nite, so we're like that.=p
after intermission was the long awaited PICTURES!!!!!(: hee.it was not bad, but i tink the eupho solo wasnt..."tired" sounding enough, the sax solo wasnt solid enough. but the bassclar solo sounded quite ok, and of cos, who can forget. the COR ANGLAIS OMGOSH. swoons~ if i could hear that solo one more time.hahahahahaha. bostock is damn cool lah! hahaha. i like his conducting, and he was damn cute.hahaha.they played two enchores, one by percy grainger the other is savanana(sp?) and polka. two very light and cute songs.hahaha. but as i said bostock, is cute! HAHAHA. hes quite old, but he still has the looks.hahaha
yup. after concert, saw sam outside, she din made it intime.*patpat* to her.. seperated from yy, then later xy,nabi, jerel,and the other two ib ppl who i fogot their names, start with ds one, just slipped my mind again-___- the blurblur one and the one who takes olevels. went to gluttons bay again, shared charkway teow again with sam, but i din really haf the appettite for it, butttt, i was hungry, just no appetite..hahaha. oh well, hung around for a while, they we departed, nabi took cab, xy nad jerel went back by mrt, sam waited at the busstop for her parents, and the two otehr ib guys waited for bus and i also lah.haha. so talked more, and crapped more, and sam gave me the korea receipt from starbucks. HAHA. yup, then i got on bus. decided to start on the myths book, but my concentration wasnt reallythere. hahaha, i just caught a bit here nad there, but its dman cool.hahahaha.
then... ya reached home, thankfully earlier than my brother. read a bit more, then i went to sleep... my dreams now adays make less and less sense. one moment im at like some band party?! and then later, we're all running away from monsters, then i stayed behind to fight them or something.hahha. then i woke up. the after that i dreamt of my japan trip. it was quite weird.hahaha.
yupp. yawns im tired. i cant wiat for my trip and yet i can too. i hafnt asked my parents about ANY of the chalets. which is bad...i know, im quite screwed now..i feel like.arghs. but i haf two consecutive chalets. like woah, actually make it three. and two land onm y bday. so i tink. still haf some confusion.
todays another boring slack at home day.haha, tmrs band. haha, hopefully ill play better.haha. yupps. seeyaaaaa
toodles~
even if i worry... i can never show it...
[em]ily_ 10:31 AM
Saturday, December 9
today is a HORRIBLE day, and its getting worse by the second.
i cant stand this anymore. at least, there was erm.. band. but then again
oh forget it
gonna get my new specs. i hope i dun look terible.
[em]ily_ 6:20 PM
Thursday, December 7
yawn. halllllllooooo. im so tiredddd.hahahaha, im out of gobstoppers, and im too lazy to go to the fridge to get more chocolate
i want to watch eragon.HAHA
ok i just proclaimed that, i want to watch eragon.
yay.
and i watched happy feet today, i still tiink open season is some what better, cos happy feet, mumble isnt lame enough, infact his feet are in such good workign order. i like the little amigos.hahahahaha. they are much lamer! AHAHAHA.
yup. okkkkk. seeyaaaa
[em]ily_ 6:28 PM
Wednesday, December 6
omg today during dinner, i looked at my reflection in the window. and i pinched my cheeks and poked my fats, and i told myself.
EMILY YOU'RE GETTING FAT. TIME TO DIET FOR A WHILE. COS ONCE YOU LEAVE FOR JAPAN, YOU"RE GNA GAIN WEIGHT TWICE THE NORMAL NOW!
so yes, i shall TRY not to be hungry, even when in blood+ they are like eating every few secnds! and even when theres like food everywhere. and even when theres like FOOD EVERYWHERE. OMG
im not hungry! im JUST NOT HUNGRY. nonononononono.
(:
[em]ily_ 8:30 PM
one word! HAGI
blood+ <3
hee
[em]ily_ 5:45 PM
Tuesday, December 5
i watched two movies today. owch, i tink theres a hole in my pocket.HAHA. like owch
finally watched step up(like how old hor,haha) it was... ok? the dance floor was hot lah. but i tink i spent more time poking the person beside me and hafing popcorn fights. oh well.
open season is DAMN FUNNY. OMG hahaha i love it to bits. hahahahaha. RABBIT FIGHT!!!!!!
i want to watch happy feet soon!
NO 9.56. GOSH. no way no way!
hahahaha, erm rite my kor wants to use now... hahaha, oh man i ate too much popcorn today.HAHAHA
ok byeeeee
[em]ily_ 7:57 PM
Monday, December 4
im starting on my christmas list, ppl, if you reallyreally want a christmas card from emily just tell her and give her your email, she'll send one personalised for you.HOHO. anw information to ALL my friends, this years cards are not gna go by snail mail as e last few years haf been, im getting lazy, im switching to email thisyear, adobe is my friend though i dun seem to be very good at it.=p ill try my best.
and i still haf to draw out my list of presents to get when i go japan...(ill try my best once again)
hmm.....and not to forget birthday presents for those celebrating this month.mmhmm...
busybusybusy, and brokebroke broke.hahaha
well as i said if you want a christmas email, tell me early,cos im leaving for japan next week, and for one whole week i wont be able to do anything.=p
confused, and torn. twisted.
its just like a cliche story. the kind that you watch on shows. its not supposed to happen in reality. yet, now it is. how fun is that....
[em]ily_ 3:00 PM
Sunday, December 3
was just playing around.hahaha. Extroversion: Conscientiousness: Agreeableness: Neuroticism: Openness to experience:Your Five Factor Personality Profile 
You have medium extroversion.You're not the life of the party, but you do show up for the party.Sometimes you are full of energy and open to new social experiences.But you also need to hibernate and enjoy your "down time."
You have high conscientiousness.Intelligent and reliable, you tend to succeed in life.Most things in your life are organized and planned well.But you borderline on being a total perfectionist.
You have high agreeableness.You are easy to get along with, and you value harmony highly.Helpful and generous, you are willing to compromise with almost anyone.You give people the benefit of the doubt and don't mind giving someone a second chance.
You have medium neuroticism.You're generally cool and collected, but sometimes you do panic.Little worries or problems can consume you, draining your energy.Your life is pretty smooth, but there's a few emotional bumps you'd like to get rid of.
Your openness to new experiences is high.In life, you tend to be an early adopter of all new things and ideas.You'll try almost anything interesting, and you're constantly pushing your own limits.A great connoisseir of art and beauty, you can find the positive side of almost anything.You Are "Dizzy and Giddy" 
Your Gluttony Quotient: 71% 
[em]ily_ 7:10 PM
hallo. emily is here!
boo sams away at kimchi land.
anw, my bro let me hear smth today, and thus i conclude, that i feel thoroughly annoyed. cos that was a friggin SYNTHESIZED bassclar. SNYTHESISED. adn yet, it had that much control! that tone. wth, and yet here i am struggling to achieve something around that quality, and someone plays with a snythesiser, adn gets that kinda sound. =(
practsie harder harder harder!
but i cleverly left my bassclar in school-_-
yay to boredom! im hungry, im tired nad im bored. and im getting new specs soon. nice redred specs. yay
toodles~
[em]ily_ 5:24 PM
Saturday, December 2
ok picts are done! HERE
[em]ily_ 11:18 AM
This past week has been my busiest but definitely my most eventful week! If not for band camp and concerts, i can imagine my bellys bulge growing bigger and bigger(considering the amount i eat). but of cos even at camp and all that ive been eating ALOT more, but i work it all off travelling to acsi with our instruments almost everyday. and of cos as always laughter, somehow i tink it makes you lose weight..SOMEHOW.HAHa.
im uploaindg the picts noww wait ah wait ah. my comp is like starting to lag!
anw i would like to thank EVERYONE who came, whether you came to support me, or anyone else(: especially sam, cos she came both days! and thus in conclusion, i had the three diff flavours of melty kiss chocolates, the best chocolates in the universe!=p but personally ill stick to the dark chocolate one=p and thanks to enjia, lijin, gen sam, cindy and the whole hoard of humanoids called my juniors,so many0.0 nco peeps...(:
and also to entire band esp doc lee! for letting me play with you all for this concert, (: thanks alot. and also thanks for all the goodluck presents! thank you thank you thank you!=D
yup the past few days have been really damn fun, lunches and stuff at nydc(their baked rice is REALLY filling) and bk(yes i agree their coke tastes like barley.) yup talking about lunch we really must talk about the two hungry ghost who went to cold storage to buy, cucumbers,baby carrots nad cherry tomatoes and chocolates, to be consumed during lunch, but then again, we also had like a double redang burger meal each. which was damn filling.
the younger they are teh more devious their minds work.
haha, anw the performance...was..ok? first day was ok, not say very good..ok rather it was kind of bad. but at least the second day we sort of made up for it, we def played much better, although there were some slipups.owch. yupps.
both days going home is always trauma,
day1 - i went home with my brother, the trauma-we were both broke-.- so at first we tried to take bus, 74 took forever, then we took 196 instead to clementi, wanted to change the 184, after waiting for ages, i went to check, like crap! we missed the last bus 30mins ago! oh well, then we went to draw mone unfortunately the place was out of ink. and the machines were spoilt. yay. so in the end we wentt to look for taxis which accept nets. after like about 5? then we found one, hoorah. and home we finally went.
day2-the trauma- the arts exhibition. i HATE that place, and walking through there alone, isnt something i ever EVER intend to do again. i was like rushing down(though actually shit it din matter whether i rushed, he still thought i took my own sweet time.) then i was like halt at the arts exhibition. then i was like walk fastfastfast. and hurry down the pitch black staircaes. and then im out! finally!phew.. freaked. never gna walk there, ill find an alternate route FOR SURE.
yup so YAY to ac! YAY to concert.. umm. yay to everyone! and YAY TO BREAKFAST! ITS FINALLY HERE. im damn hungry! picts will be up soon! its almost done!!!! but if my bro grabs the comp later, then wait forever=p
anw its been ages since i gave some lyrics, so heres another nice song i ve been listening to lately.
enjoy~
BAD DAY -Daniel Powter
Where is the moment when you need it the most
You kick up the leaves and the magic is lost
Tell me your blue sky's fade to grey
Tell me your passion's gone away
And I don't need no carryin' on
You're standin' in line just to hit a new low
You're fakin' a smile with the coffee to go
Tell me your life's been way off line
You're fallin' to pieces every time
And I don't need no carryin' on
'Cause you had a bad day, you're taking one down
You sing a sad song just to turn it around
You say you don't know, you tell me don't lie
You work on a smile and you go for a ride
You had a bad day, the camera don't lie
You're comin' back down and you really don't mind
You had a bad day... you had a bad day
Well you need a blue sky holiday
The point is they laugh at what you say
And I don't need no carryin' on
You had a bad day, you're takin' one down
You sing a sad song just to turn it around
You say you don't know, you tell me don't lie
You work on a smile and you go for a ride
You had a bad day, the camera don't lie
You're comin' back down and you really don't mind
You had a bad day...(mmm... holiday)
Sometimes the system goes on the blink and the whole thing it turns out wrong
You might not make it back and you know that you could be well all that strong
And I'm not wrong... (Yeahh!!)
So where is the passion when you need it the most
(oh, when you're down)
You kick up the leaves and the magic is lost
'Cause you had a bad day, you're takin' one down
You sing a sad song just to turn it around
You say you don't know, you tell me don't lie
You work on a smile and you go for a ride
You had a bad day, you see what you like
And how does it feel, one more time,
You had a bad day... you had a bad day
(ahh yeahh!!)
You had a bad day 3x
(faded)
~
http://artists.letssingit.com/daniel-powter-lyrics-bad-day-jcs62pq
[em]ily_ 10:03 AM
Wednesday, November 29
the much awaited prom picts. HERE
They had fun with the camera.=p
Xinyan and me
Nabilah nad xinyan
TMR! AHHHHH.0.0
[em]ily_ 5:16 PM
boo. band campps over, despite how tiring it all was it was relaly kinda fun lah.HAHA.(:
lets seeeeee....
i shall just talk about yesterday.
YSETERDAY.
woke up at 6 plus then saw xys message, starts at 1030. and i was like0.0! YAY. plops back on bed..zZZzz then after a few nightmares that i ended up being late for band, i woke up almost immd and went back to preparing to go for band. once again the stupid security guard, is stupid. its so annoying trying to get into the school, cos my sch u is yellow nad turquoise.-.-
ok nvm. reached the girls room filled with super exhausted ppl, cos they slept at 4 last nite and woke up at 9, woah.
combined pract was kinda funny, bz was like saying that he was damn sharp, so i told him to go file himself smooth. then later he took his file and put it on his head, and "filed" himself. talking about sharp, i was super sharp yesterday.=(
haha. yup., thennn i with the saxes(fary,nabilah,mayanne nad zhenrong), luqman, meiling and xy went to eat pizza! hahaha, i could haf eaten more, looks like me and maryanne would be constantly being hungry tgt.HAHA. oh wellll. yupp, then went to err.... acsi, was damn crazee cos we had to climb the gate, and we had like so much heavy instruments and stuff to bring over...haha.
yup. alot of time was wasted during rehersals AGAIN. oh man. i was like spending half my time there sleeping, cos we were waiting for out turn to do the stands nad stuff. then dinner i shared with xinyan and ate abit here and there from the rest.haha. yupps.wahlao the alley brawl was actually quite stupid, cos all i was doing was ticking joel in his tummy and he was just trying to pull off my rubber band in my hair.and then just that he got caught in a corner nad so i just tried to knee him. oh well. its called girls school legacy. oh well nth really happened. i tink.hohoho.
did rehearsals again until like 9plus. was so damn shag liaos, like everyone else. but the laast run through was damn funny, cos we did it without our instruments. so ya, it turned out damn...FUNNY, cos doc lee was singing the parts.HAHAHA. yup then trooped back to acjc, over the gate once again. and then we grabbed our stuff, stupid martin kept trying to scare me and jefri, luckily i had my torch all ready.HAHA. but i still HATE teh arts exhibition area. especially in the dark. it has....strange vibes*shudders* then walked to the mrt station, and home i go.
SLLEEEEP i woke up at 11 plus today, latest so far. i tink? oh welllll....... ok red blue gold, whee!
i hope i wont screw up tmr.....oh well JIAYOU FOR TMR EVERYBODY!!!(:
[em]ily_ 12:10 PM
Monday, November 27
hallo, it would appear the upload here as of now is kinda screwed up, and imagestation is like down. so prom picts, you're gna wait for a lonnngggg while, tmr ill be down for pract from like 8am to like 11pm? so dun expect me to upload, im only on tonite, cos they're hafin nite games now, and so i could leave earlier than on sat and sun, when pract ended at like 1o plus.
so keep waiting
and gawd im damn tired.
YAWN
one mroe day of band camp left! and then its a day break hopefully, and then CONCERT. oh shit, im kinda screwd, like harrypotter the part wit my long notes, that im the only bass, im like shit out of tune, like im already sharp, and somemore according to the tien yin, im supposed to be flat to make the chord DAMN nice, and im like. SHITSHITHIST, like looseen loosen loosen!!!! loosen until my jaws hurt nad my lips area also, in the end, my notes were still sharp! WTH... haiz. ive got to figure out smth. grrrr. and then like starwars, my runnign notes, still not all the notes come out, adn like unclear articulation..=( and not say mvtmt 3 which is the like damn exciting part, is like damn accurate either. like omg.... my combinmed pieces are mostly ok, can play ok lah.
the best is not yet to be... the best is NOW
ergh... by hook or by crook, i MUST get it right likeASAP. like DAMN asap! ahhhhh. haha. ok enough panicking.. practise practise..
prom was fun, the food was good, like sharksfin, cold octopus, steamed fish, and i swear my appetite is like back liao lah, i can eat like..OMG alot, this is kinda creepy cos just a few days ago, just the thought of food, made me puke, now rite, i like so want to eat, inbettween meals, i also imagine food. eek im gna become like damn fat. but heck ive ben eating so much, esp since for dinner, xy doesnt eat much.
oh man and that jerel and joel arh, team up and bully ppl. ill NEVER NEVER NEVER trust either of them.grrr. and i tink im addicted to the maggi mee atacsis canteen.hahahahahaha. and omg carrying the instru back and forth between acjc and the cpa at ib is like damn shag. haha, oh well training.haha.
mmhmm... its like manymany ppl falling ill, hope they'll get better, esp mel who was still quite down before i elft... i wonder how creepy night games were.HAHA.like omg, thank gawd i wasnt staying.hahaha. hahaha. yupp
hmm... miss class '03-'06.hahaha, no matter how weird things got, and stuff, it was fun, if you tink of the good times rather then the bad times which would surely exist.hahaha yup, takkaires peeps, and all the ebst for all your future endeavours, whichever path you may choose to take(:
hmm. oh ya, sunday day games was damnFUNNY. hahahahahahaha. esp water bombs where we went like bare footed in the field, with all its mud and all, and threw water bombs.HAHA.damn fun!(: yup, ok i ll try to upload picts asap. be patient lah! ppl damn busyt and damn tired, and was like damn nice to already inform you that the picts are coming soon. so appreciate it, or else go and die, cos im too shag to bother anymore.YAWn
goodnite!
[em]ily_ 10:57 PM
Friday, November 24
hallo, yest i was damn shag so i din use the comp. instead i was like half alsp and talking to sam after copying the entire intonation chart into my score.haha
i just woke up! ok maybe 30 mins ago. and i feel muchmuch better, but the next four days! i hope i get some sleep or smth(: haha
lol, im damn bored now can. its like theres nothing to do!!! hahaha and im too tired to read or anything else around that area, or to go shopping or anything. haha.
darn, damn bored. ok i shall go..er.. watch youtube, but not one tree hill! no motivation to watch it anymore
haha
anw tonites prom! await the photos! it'll take time to come up tho, cos the next day i would be damn busy till damn late, or rather the next four days, so we'll see how lah.haha
okkk byebyeee
[em]ily_ 11:05 AM
Wednesday, November 22
my stomachs giving me trouble.booo.
the perf was quite ok, but my legs were killing me. hohoho. ermm... ya so meiling at kino. and then met mama at kino, and then later sige and papa. ate hotdog for dinner, omg all the fats! hahaha, but i looooveeee orange julius orange juice! =p
okkk thenn....... oh saw xinyan at taka..all orange as always.haha
yupp.. damn tired nowww. tmr got pract at ib. jiayoujiayoujiayou! =p
oookkkk i shall go sleep now
damn shag.
and i finally haf kept up with bleach, the bounto should just go and die!=p
toodles!~
[em]ily_ 10:06 PM
Tuesday, November 21
stupid shuzhen, just cos os are over doesnt mean im all that free you knowwww..*yawn* in fact im damn tired rite now.. today was band pract, and the appealers was sup to come today or smth.. lets see... had stupid PAE talk, which i was hardly listening, andplus the testimonials filled with crap lah, i looked atit and laughed my ass off.
they finally informed us wat time our prom started. ywan.. yupp..haha. ermmm
oh ya xinyan is angry cos i got her name mixed up and said xinyuan earlier. SORRY LAH. but anw xinyuan isnt really a guys name lor, i know girls with that name. (: and xinyan if you're reading this, i would like to inform you that though my brother din reply you he told me that he supported me. SO. i win again.HOHOHO. :D
anw it was kinda fun, spend my setion time with the clarinet, i seriously realised that i dun really have a section! am i in the clarinets or the double reeds....diaoooooo.... oh welll.... hmm.. ok tmr gna look for a shirt...
hmmm i hope i can play lehs. its like i still keep screwing up.=( oh well jiayous...hmmm.. ok damn tired,damn confused, and erm, damn...shiiiiittttttt. haha
i tink im outta stuff to type, goooooodddbyeeeeeee
toodles~
[em]ily_ 9:45 PM
Monday, November 20
conclusion: Prom shopping is SUPER tiring
=p
blueblueblueeeeeeeee. im going@_@
did i tell you tha star bucks plastic cup for hot water is so tiny and cute!
(:
i dunno wat else to say.... hmmmm.......... HAHAHAHA okkkkkkkkkkkk
hopefully i dun screw up as much tmr!(:
[em]ily_ 4:55 PM
Sunday, November 19
lets go retro!(:
Thats the best hint im giving out for my prom concept, doesnt it say everything?(:
[em]ily_ 9:37 PM
hallohallo. angie said that my blog lets everyone know every single detail of my life, so i thought to myself, ok! i shant type out what happened yest! then i thought carefully, REALLY carefully about what to type if i dun type that.*yawn* then i fell asleep and the only idea i had was erm..
yest went for acband pract it was fun!(:
then wham i fell alsp-.-
so now early in the morning, my brotehr still up there snoring. i gave up and i decided i shall stick to my usual, i did thisthisthis kinda thingy.haha, but i shall make it short, and sweet.
hmm, ok i woke up at 630, and i was like @_@ yawnnnnn, forget i want more sleep! but eventually i woke up. then i woke my brother up at 7 as he said he wanted to be woken up at. then we went for breakfast, nasi lemak stall not open yet! SO SAD. haha, ok nvm then we went off toacband, they were showing me the bus route on thecar. lol.
reached LT4 quite early.. set up pract a bit, combined sectionals. lincohnshire posy(however you spell it-.-) ROCKS.wheeeeee. lincohnshire posy~~~~~~ hahaha. okkk ya quite cool lah, just that i kept screwing up during pract=( hahaha. i was like pulsepulsepulse, which was actually much better than usual. but stilllllllll. hahaha. and like i was like fingers! wake up! MOVE! but as always like my past four years, it did not bulge. especially becuase some of the songs ewre sightreading, my sightreading really sucks yout know.hahaha.
ok then later we went pack to get ready to go to acsib new hall and t eat lunch. initially, i was going with my bro, jx, ms sng, i tink. but i saw angie!(: and then she, amirah, dominic nad feroz were going for lunch, so the ENTIRE group went out at first, and we split at the coffeeshop. instead of my brotehr (who would haf treated me if i was with him-_-haha) i ate lunch with angie, dominic,amirah nad feroz. and i saw xiangning!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!(= yay!
haha ok then we went IB. and iwas like.o.0 they had thosethose....nicenice shiny tiled floors, it looked like somesome.... i dunno, DAMN COOL CAN. the hall area it looked more like a recreational facilities place! and i was still likeo.0 but anw went into the ahll, i swear i had the EXACT same reaction as when i walked into acsb hall earlier this year. (therefore i concluede that acsis hall was the least interesting.HAHA.) ya then combine, i was just basiclaly hiding under darrens volume thats why i screwed up jurassic park! HAHAHA. ok i TRIED my best. hmmm... but yes ill try harder. then ya after combine and logistics which were damn crazy hahaha but damn fun, and its through here i met moremore ppl. and it helped to warm me up cos the hall was like how friggin cold can. then was the usual caryying stuff, and im like yay! i can still carry all this stuff! but now i realsie im not as pro anymore, cos my arms hurt already-.-
haha, yup went back ac... which was damn funny cos amirah started calling kor, kor. so in that sense she suddenly became my sis-.-HAHA. and now my new nick is wat xiaopooi or small pooi kindly donated by shibin-.- anw my section gna get colourful ties.LOL. hahahahaha. thats like damn funny.
then went for dinner, and here i met MORE ppl.haha.let see my table had erm joel, jerral(sp?) yingda,kristen, mel,kor,xinyuan(sp?) yup. then ate alot while kristen and xinyuan argued over essential brew and starbucks.and joel was bullying xinyuan.HAHA. then the otehr table im not really sure..heh.then thank you dr lee for the dinner(: then we went off to holland v. kor taught me MAANY new things.HAHA. then we went star bucks at first no place nad polus kristen they all were doing the tune in souveniers, so me xinyuan, kor an djoel went to essential brew, which is a damn cool place! hahahaha.then we crapped alot. then joel and xinyuan kept fighting, more than me and bro do.HAHAHA. and i picked up many tips such as, never do what joel tells you to do or anything around that area. and the finger is highly effective.,
then we went home aroun 1045 plus. thentried to hail a cab in the end took bus, anw xinyuan left before us to get ehr helicopter.haha. then we bused home, yawns was so tired. then after that joel got off first, and then me and my kor walked home, talked here and there, by soem mriacle managed to walk home.hahaha.
yawn i need to pract alotalot. and today gna get prom dress! and the concert attire. yup. and winter clothes i tink.hahaha. oh i forgot to mention howi tried to get out of the schools back gate by climbing over, by some miracle i managed to.HAHAHA. yuppp
inn of sixth happiness i screwed up my solo! HAHA. ok. yupp parents home, giving me the deathglare, dunno why also but ill go check it out. yup. ok i realised that wasnt so short nad sweet.HAHA. oh wellllll.....ok i gtg seey a around. OS ARE OVER. omg, im so retardly slow.
toodles!~
[em]ily_ 9:48 AM
Friday, November 17
im currently trying to recover from shock of the history paper, and feel a sense of relieve that its all over.
shoot its still not fittin in that im sup to be screaming HEY OS ARE OVER!
-.-
ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh..im getting slow and retarded
and im awaiting my brotehrs return, he says hes gna be damn hyper-.- that'll be nice to see. boo. os are over are over are over! emily wake up os are over!!!!!!!!*whacks* ok nvm, os are over, i tink ill realise it tmr at the very least. band pract tmr, so many pl are going.HAHA wait till i tell my bro that, i tink he'll faint.-.- HAHAHA. okkkkk till later i shall take my leave and practise, and try to realise that os are over-.-
[em]ily_ 5:44 PM
SIX MORE HOURS! omg, freedom is so near, i dun even recognise it anymore!!!!
hitler! be a dear and come out for the papers! i know everyone says he wont, but please do! or at elast dear ole gustav stresseman oror the weimar govt!!!!!!! PLEASEEEEEEEEEEEEE=p
freedom! in six more hours, one stack of books, a stack of scores! ff9, a stack of piano scores, a stack of animes to watch.
funfunfunfunfunfun. languages to learn! omg, im so fricking excited, i hope this energy would helpm e write faster later!!!!!!=p
oh man and tmr! i cant wait, and yet of cos im kinda worried, tonites gna be supersuper intensive, like mreo than usual, esp since the last two nites i din pract as usual=( uhohhhhh
but somehow it'll be ok, i tink dancing megahits is like making me damn hyper can!!! HAHAHA. ok! back to hitler and germany!(:
TMR!(: see ya around peeps!
6 mreo frigging hours!!!! JIAYOUS EVERYONE!(:
[em]ily_ 10:13 AM
Thursday, November 16
today was like kinda ..... DIE LAH. chemchemchem! its supposed to be my BEST science, and now i haf to add the "" with best. its now officially my least confident subject in the entire set. like wth can, it was supposed to be manageable! like all the past year papers! im screwed! cos i know like not everyone thinks that way, so the bellcurves not affected=( i hope some miracle occurs! but oh well, at least its over.haha. amaths was... ok........... i guess.
ok and thats over.
less than 19 more hours to go. i hope i can cramp EVERYTHING IN. minusing like 9 odd hours of sleep. gawd. im so tired can.*yawn* hmmmmm... i tink ill become damn busy for a while, so forgive me if i dun come lonline and update nmuch....mmhmmmm.....lemme seeeeee......*thinks* i actually dunno much, but i hope germany comes out tmr! and china for sbq! or at least a REALLY easy russia cold war question, i hope the questions are straight forward.....
ill survive! i can do it! some how, some way.
jiayoujiayoujiayoujiayoujiayoujiayou.
and i admit, saturday is freaking me out more than friday is-.- intensive starts lieksoon soonsoon im deadbut ill survive.HAHA
prom is next week! and i cant wait!=p
byebyeee!!(:
[em]ily_ 9:25 PM
Wednesday, November 15
two more days and four more papers! oh joy! how ive been waiting for this day! today three papers passed. physics 1 n 2 and geog 1
geog 1 was pretty screwed up.*shakes head* i dun wanna think about it.
physics 1 was also screwed up, its like i was SO tired, that i couldnt concentrate, and like i slept for almost 15 mins, the papers a 1hour paper can. like shit. even htough i finished it before i fellaslp but its like, i was so sians. im pretty sure im screwed. paper 2 was quite ok i guess, better than the tons of papers i did at home.... hmm. yupp. theres like this stack of strings on my desk! cos like there was already one there, then the teacher gave us strings in case we need to tie up, which i didnt, further more, the teacher gave me THREE strings.0.O so now, theres like FOUR strings there, nad im like..wth-.- and all the other tables haf like at elast one string, and im like riiiiitttteeee..
and for phy2 i was quite like panicky, cos i was like WHATS THE GRAPH PAPER FOR! cos no matter how i looked, i din see any use for it all. so i panicked! as always.
ok then after physics i staye for geog, jeanette sabo and me went to mobil, get foofd. ate at the pavilon. studied a bit. after a while. IT RAINED LIKE SHIT. had to grab my bag and run indoors, and help some batchmates who disappeared and left their bags. i reallyrelaly am not the type who'll leave otehr ppls stuff lying in the STORM. gosh, it was pouring like as if someone up there was emptying a cup of water down this tiny hole.grrr.
ok then i spent the other half of the time bothering my band juniors and stuff... quiite fun.HAHA. i guess im quite annoying always staying there, adn then like no that cannot, this cannot.HAHAHA. oh welllllllll.... im proud to say that at least, my arm strength is still good. and wenjun! dun use that lousy swab anymore!!!!! later get stuck again, like me and peihoon try to get it out until likehands bright red liao. hahahaha. oh well, hope ehr instrus ok!(:
rite emilys damn shit position now. somehow i haf to decide. argh. no regrets. thats all i hope ill end up with. its like suddenly this entire month, life just keeps throwing me weird decisions! and i swear, if i ever haf to make another difficult decision like that again. ill scream. and scream and scream., cos. its damn shit. ARGH.oh well....and i hoped ill become more sane after os.
was helping jeanette come out with some sick questions and answers for ehr dating game thingy. oh bother, all the pervertic ideas-.- this is really...bad. eurgh.ok no mroe about that dating game. all those ideas shall be removed from my mind. NOW. like no more. -.- unless jeanette asks again that is. oh well
anw, jiayous ppl, for many of you, tmrs the last day! last shot at it! enjoy the last olevel experience=p
for oresama, she still has another day after that, but oh well, the nice big story book called history, aint so bad i suppose. lil survive.
promprom!! i need to get stuff fastttttt. dressdressdress,, hiar accessoriesaccessories, earrings! andand i dunno lah, wtv otehr crap. but oh well dress is the most impt. should i go get the hair salon to settle my hair, or should i just settle it myself...hmmmmmmm.... oh well! ERJIE I WANT PICTS OF YOUR PROM !(:
yupp. suddenly my kor has so many nice music int he comp, band nad not band. hmmmm.. anw heres a concert promotion,
SAF band esplanade 10/12/2006 FREE. pieces like picture exhibition, etcetc,
quite cool stuff, theres this really morbid piece that they're playing.*shudders*its like listen then the shiver runs down your spine. then like shit. did i hear smth i shouldnt haf.:( freakyyyyy.hahaha. okkk. actually i like heard the entire repertoire.HAHA. but im still going!
and todays supposed to rockapellas concert. it should haf ended by now. so sad! they dun even seem to haf cds in singapore! which is sososoSO sad. argh. missing their concert...is like :( i wish they at elast start selling their cds in singapore man!=( haiz..oh welll. i gtg and get back to mugging, yawn. lots to do. late night again, and im damn tired. yawn. headache like shit. but., NO i must MUG. mustmustmustmust.
anyway heres some lyrics!(:
enjoy!~
Here in my heart//plus one
Whereever you are tonight girl
I'll see you in my dreams
Whereever I go tomorrow
You'll be here next to me
And though we are a world apart
I know you'll never be that far
'Cause here in my heart
There's a picture of us
Together forever
Unfaded and unbroken
Wherever you are
Your love covers me
Forever more you'll be
Here in my heart
Whenever I miss you so much
It's more than I can bear
I won't cry,
I'll just close my eyes
And know you'll be there
Your kiss and your touch
I'll never forget'
Cause you're as close
As my very next breath
'Cause here in my heart
There's a picture of us
Together forever
Unfaded and unbroken
Wherever you are
Your love covers me
Forever more you'll be
Here in my heart
And though we are a world apart
I know you'll never be that far
'Cause here in my heart
There's a picture of us
Together forever
Unfaded and unbroken
Wherever you are
Your love covers me
Forever more you'll be
Here in my heart
My heart
http://www.mp3lyrics.org/p/plus-one/here-in-my-heart/
toodles~
[em]ily_ 10:37 PM
Tuesday, November 14
stupid pimple! GET OFF MY FACE.=( grrrrrrr. todays amaths was ok i guess. THANKS SAM! because she went through this and that..phew~
i tink its either im stressed or im damn resolved to lose weight before prom. but my appetitte has shrucnk like crazy! but now im really hungry cos lets see i went to subway bought the usual small one, ate HALF of it. and drank half a cup of lemon tea. and small bits of subway cookie, and now. im starved. my meal was at 11.-.-
oh bother bought a nice thingy for my hair.WHOOT.
and thats all for stress relief. now worry for tmr. as i worry all the time, only that tmr...its physics. emilys nightmare. yes her well known nightmare from present past and future.*muggs*its so bad i dunno what to mugg.i only know i dunno anything. and tehres NO MORE TIME. and somehow i must find time to practise my bassclarinet
and *yawn* i need sleep
ok i should get back to work, before i doze off
see ya!
[em]ily_ 6:19 PM
booo. last night mokona talked to modoki until latelate. then modoki taught mokona amaths until 3am.ok not really taught.more like listened. yawn
honey and chocolate and chocolate and chocole*beep* [you ares upposedto leave a message so that i can get back to you]
thank you mokona!(: laughed like shit last nite/morning.
but now damn tired. yawn...coffee no effect yet.. the hyperness should arrive just in time.tonie come home and CHIONG PHYSICS!!!!!!!!!!!!!
oh bother...emilys relaly panicking!!!!!!!!!
ARGHHHHHHHHHH
i hope everything on your side is ok.
toodles~
[em]ily_ 10:07 AM
Monday, November 13
hallooo. todays quite a productive day.. i did 1 amaths paper, 450 geog mcqs(thats a teeny bit insane, i agree) read through the first three themes of physics
ok i shall now proceed on to.... the entire segment of china. then tonite if kor doesnt come home. ill practice starwars.. and...if still got time... then il run through jurassic park. then at about 1030ill do physics paper. and sleep by 1130. ok. if i can achieve this, il be godlike(thinks of dota-.-)
hmmmm.. ok its kinda late, i should stop talking rubbish and get back to work. coffee is the sweetest addiction ever(sense the irony?) yup amaths tmr! chiong ppl!
and how i wish bushybush trip had caused history paper to be pushed to the morning, but it din=( and i hope it doesnt affect sat.*prays fervently*
anw how does this new arranggment go? its hard to see this box now rite... boooo.. my most impt part in this skin is actually the middle box aka the sidebar picture. my finest piece of worlk. that still needs improvement=p oh welll.. is this one better or the earlier one but all the boxes pushed allt eh way to left?
ok lyrics! enjoy!(:
DON'T KNOW HOW TO LOVE HIM
from Jesus Christ Superstar
I don't know how to love him.
What to do, how to move him.
I've been changed, yes really changed.
In these past few days, when I've seen myself,
I seem like someone else.
I don't know how to take this.
I don't see why he moves me.
He's a man. He's just a man.
And I've had so many men before,
In very many ways,
He's just one more.
Should I bring him down?
Should I scream and shout?
Should I speak of love,
Let my feelings out?
I never thought I'd come to this.
What's it all about?
Don't you think it's rather funny,
I should be in this position. I
'm the one who's always been
So calm, so cool, no lover's fool,
Running every show.
He scares me so.
I never thought I'd come to this.
What's it all about?
Yet, if he said he loved me, I'd be lost.
I'd be frightened.
I couldn't cope, just couldn't cope.
I'd turn my head.
I'd back away.
I wouldn't want to know.
He scares me so.
I want him so.
I love him so.
http://www.stlyrics.com/lyrics/jesuschristsuperstar/dontknowhowtolovehim.htmstrange how everything fits.
[em]ily_ 4:36 PM
Sunday, November 12
(: ill tink about the tagger.
anw big fish eat small fish eat smaller fish!(:
HAHAHA mama introed me to cute guy! on teevee-.- HAHAHAHA(:
(: okkk mugged quite hard today. and im damn stressed
now i want to watch one tree hill!<3
heehee
ill try to do smth about the tagger, ok soonsoon
i must tink
[em]ily_ 6:05 PM
its quite cute ! our juniors wanna make their own version of jametty. our descendants!(is that the rite word.*scratch head*) im FULLY surportive HAHA.(:
ANW photos from FRIDAY ARE HERE
[em]ily_ 9:05 AM
Saturday, November 11
HEY. hows my skin! the side bar rite, the idea is like the fairy tale is getting blown out of the book.. with the flower petals,(which are just extra effects) i borrowed a rose, opened book, petals picture from gettyimages, cut and paste, and add the misty hingy and the stars thingys. and made the complete pretty side bard. i like it. and it shows my true thoughts and all that! COMMENT REALLY PLEASE!!!!!!!i tink its my best work yet, but i wont know how to make an even better one after this without suggestions!(: PLEASE AND THANKYOU!
[em]ily_ 9:14 PM
hmmm. today was a waste of time-.- shit. oh well. anyway i haf an idea for a new blog skin! so watch out for it! should be coming out soon..(see told you today was a waste of time-.-) hmmm their hafin some thingy downstairs, some show an stuff. so much singing and karaoke. ahhhhhh. annoying, hard to practise my bas now.-.-
hard to study too.
ok thats all i haf to say about today... oh but i like that sound my dad has.... its lyrics... are damn nice...
hmm ok the next part dun read unless you're really bored.just a bunch of random ramblings once again
It resurfaced...
I told it confidently and steadily...
Go away...
It just smiled.
I told it steadily but softly...
Go away...
It just laughed..
I told it softly, my thoughts faltering as i spoke..
Please go away...
It just joked..
I faltered further, i said,my voice wavering
Please go away...
It just smirked...
My voice wavering,my body trembling, i said...
Please go away...
It stared rite into my eyes..and my soul
My body was trembling,my tears trickled down my face, i begged..
Please please go away..
And still it stayed there not moving..
Eyes peering into my heart..
Seeing my blatantly shattering confidence...
[em]ily_ 8:23 PM
yesterday was a GOOD day, but yet forgive me i wasnt in a right state of mind..very deranged-.- i tink i need mental aid. hmm but first things first...
HAPPY 31ST NCO POP ANNIVERSARY!!!!!!!(:
ok i shall start my report. ok, i got up around eight plus, then i was in no mood to mug, so i just stared into space, only read one para in my hist text. then about 10 plus left for lunch at taka, went to eat ajisen. yum, but me no appetitte sad=( hahaha. so i went to school after stopping at borders for awhile, i went josh grobans cd.(: AHAHAHA. my mums getting it for me so oh well!(: then.... went to school, was there about 12 plus, talked rubbish with kaily,and the rest of them. then later jeanette came, then the lining up which was so impossibly crazy. i tink it made me cranky.damn. then nvm. went up. did the friggin paper, redid it twice, and i still almost or maybe i wAS aslp for the last hlaf an hour. i was just like
staring straight at the front, eyes glazed and unfeeling.
then they started collecting, and it started to rain. then i wa slike NBOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. and i started praying, stop raining stop raining stop raining. then after that we got off after 3o minutes! of screaming ad rubbish also-.- then i rushed off grabbed my bag changed and ran to meet pris, THANKS FOR THE LIFT!(: then reached there about 550 i tink? ya SO MANY PPL THERE ALR! so happy!
so many hi s and hellos, so many grins and smiles, so many friends requinted finally.
many juniors, many ncos 31st and the 30ths. ms azilah came! not FAIR.-.- HAHA. ok then so many familiar faces. laugh and laugh, watched with erjie and laoda.sige was with his junior?and sange came later so much rubbish lah!(: haha. yup it was..ok? i guess every year like that one lah, i din really take photos, will upload later maybe? HAHA. then.... after taht the crazee mass of ppl. damn funny, wenjun is SO BLACK NOW.HAHA.and pris not really. but the trumpets sounded quite loud=p hahahaha. ok then lets see..... ran around look here nad there, papa finally came. then after along while sige,sange,laoda, me and amira went off, erjie went off early for a meeting.=( then we talked alot of crap,
why the hell did i see the poster on OLEVELS. how could i haf been so lucky?
finally reached wisma, mama waited for longggg. SORRY.=( haha. then....we went taka for dinner in the end. amira left=( and then we ate at macs. every time after nco, ill end up eating at macs.HAHA. ok then not much appetite-.- then we went to kino. SO MANY BOOKS I WANT
nonononon cannot home gt so many liao! MUSTNT must read finish first!sobs. i want to buy books! ok nvm then we left. wahlao this is when it was quite annoying.
then we went back, i left at the usual back door,ok heres when the trauma started-.- at least for me. i walked to the glass door, at first i din see it closing, when i was near it i saw so i stepped back only to land on one of my foot. and get this cramp. like the muscles went theoopsoite directiono or smth-.- then nvm before i fall i use the other leg for support. step. and then shit cramp also! EXACT SAME PAIN. then i was like shit im gna FALL. but luckily i din.phew.
thanks for laughing.-.-
then wahlao my entire legs were like so shitty until only this morning then it was ok.thwn at night i and sam talked crap until like 130 in the morning! HAHA how imposible we are. but thanks sam for cheering me up! cancer cell liek warrior attacked the guy, and he died.HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. ok im not so mean=p heh nice picts nice picts.
ok i guess i should start mugging, im slacking too much i cant stand it!haha ok after one amaths paper, chem one papaer, mugg physics. pract bass for 2hours, and the mugg more physics. YAY. JIAYOUS!
and after alls that said and done, in the end... im back in square one.
SIX MORE DAYS. EIGHT MORE PAPERS
toodles!~
[em]ily_ 11:01 AM
Friday, November 10
argh.its at times like these that you reallyreally feel like a fool. like your last four years haf been a dream, a waste of time. to think my fundamentals were THAT weak. i mean i admitted that my fundamentals were weak. but hell. to be this weak..sucks lah. i really wonder whether i can make it now! its as annoying as iam, the worst thing is how SLOW i learn new things. like really SLOW. and thats really annoying. cos i can never get things rite, and i know hes annoyed with me. but no matter how yali is everywhere now, home,school, whereever. booo. ok but i must persevere! i dun care about the last 4 years of fundametnals, i care about the next 4 weeks worth of it. im gna become a better player then i ever was!
oh well later is emaths, it shoulddddddd be ok rite? hahaha. GOODLUCK TO EVERYONE ELSE!
and may it not rain toninte! as in this evening! see all you ncos tonite!(:
darn im down with the cough and the sore throat! i tink its my kors fault-.-grrrr. oh wellll. ill try my best to drink more and more and more water.
toodles!~
[em]ily_ 9:36 AM
Thursday, November 9
BOO. i haf survived todays trauma!xD okkkkkkkkkkkkkkk i know laurel wants a report from yest, as well as TODAY. so heres to a longgggg oneXD
yesterday was eng, oh gawd eng was screwed.... its damn stupid, i muigged sooooooo hard for narrative.and in the end i did... AN EXPOSITORY. hell. i mean DREAMS its such a dangerous topic! for a writer like me. and the other one is like, i looked at it, and i told myself. emily you're not gna do it, i assure you you will go out of point. with a gut feeling like that, no way was i gna do it. so i did the one on singapore education. that one was pretty easy i guess. hopefully i haf enough points. it turned out quite ss-ish.. oh welll. and die lah for paper 2 its kinda...screwed up. i was like the wthwthwth.its like can find the points, but whether i answered the question to the point anot i dunno. and i dun tink so. arghhhhhh
ok enough about english.
today the killer combi-bio n geog-.- i tink i almost suffered from mental disorder. ask jeanette,sabo, liuqing, or anyone else, anyone could tell that i was half mad, my usual lameness perked up at the extreme, especially the part, where we were saying how to get jeantte to boil her own tea which became how her cutting wood will make the bukit timah hill fall on her(soilerosion!) and how somehow her house would be spared, maybe later ill draw some cartoons to explain the quirky-not-so-normal ideas of ours.. haha maybe.
bio was...m ok a slight mental block, but overall it was ok, just tinktink abit. and somehow can get one. it wasnt as hard as prelims. sooo.hopefully, it'll be muchhhhh better. hmmm. and i still cant believe, that i almost mistake the action of transpiration to that of the action of pollution and the effect of sulphur dioxide on the stomata of leaves.-.-
geog was rubbish, my prediction came true, rivrs DISAPPEARED. but the rest was still quite hellish-.- because i couldnt really rmb, vegetation was regurgitation-only that i couldnt quite rmb. and tectonics was like die lah earthquakes-.- and the weathering ones a bitttt quirky. and the population one was tedious. hopefully ill get an A2? oh well.
hmmm. that wasnt so long after lall!! maybe im just drop dead tired thats why., me and nandhu shared a cab home today, passed ccab! therefore we agreed to share cab tmr so that i can reach there before 6. YAY. i almost jumped off the taxi and run straight in, luckily i was TIRED. yawn.
hmmm....... i dunno wat else to write leh! let me think....... tomorrows emaths, and then there'll be eight more papers next week.... but after today, the worst is OVER. the next nightmare will be physics....o.o i suck at physics, i cant even do the tys! cos thery are all filled with explain this explain that, and iall i know is how to apply equations.-.- riteeeee. yawn im so sleepy, tonite i shall rpact my bassclar a bit and then history will sing me a lullaby to sleep. therefore its CHINA tonite. yawn itinkimfinallygettingahangofthings
i shall pract one emaths and its all over. goodluck for those with emaths tomorrow!
NO MORE BIO FOR ME! (:
toodles~
[em]ily_ 6:01 PM
Tuesday, November 7
haunted...
after last nights nightmare, i at least now am assured that im human and not entirely a trashcan. The nightmare opened my eyes to the painful fears i have buried deep in my heart, the painful thoughts. And at least now i know what im afraid of,and at least why... nvm. Oh well at least the fears are the common human fears,i think. No its not death,its worse than death.
And holy i swear im going to get two dark streaks forever imprinted on my face. 0.0 what the hell. twice. last night it was twice. the second time it just wont stop. rite in the middle of the night. i woke up..in tears..again.-.-
argh. im just really screwed up..the lachrymal glands are at full gear this week, while last week it was stagnant. i tink someone accidentally tried to reactivate the lachrymal glands but accidentally pulled the lever to uncontrollable state. someone must haf gone into my head and did that.-.-
ARGH. im just so frigging annoyed at myself. of all times, NOW. during os, and im in a really dead-want-to-kill-myself mood.
Oh and all the talk about the toes getting stuck in escalators and all that set my mum thinking about the time whenn i was really young. aboutttt pri 1? when jurong point still had the old lok, and not as it is now. then my bro and cousin took a sudden interest in jumping onto the escalators grabbing move up a bit, then jump down again.-.- i watching, being only pri 1, stupid naive, and hey, it looked fun lah! so puny little me jumped up. grabbed the railing, and then i didnt dare jump back off. -.- soon i was going up the escalator, the WRONG WAY.rather than on the steps, i was outside the escalator, should i let go and fall, i wont be here rite now, or ill be severely scarred for life. Luckily for me, a nice man pulled me over. I still rmb that i was scared shitless and kept crying and crying. freakyfreaky.
but you know should i have had just let go and jumped off, and had died or smth, maybe it'll haf been better.. then at least the world would be one less of a vermin. but oh well.. since i was allowed to live, i guess i should cut the rot talk,and try to use my life to the best of what life represents.
oh heres a new idea i came up with,
Lifes always throwing shit at you and expecting that you turn the shit to gold. If you can happy lah, but watch out, more shits coming! If you cant and all the shit piles around you, die lah. best do your best and turn the shit to gold...
and thats what friends are all about, helping each other with the shit, and turning every piece of crap to pure solid gold.
hmm.. oh well... tmrs english! GOODLUCK EVERYONE. gawd, english, freaky im panicking for essay. *shudders* oh well........... if a topic of war came up il be cheering and jumping like a mad monkey. but the probability is one outta a million.
and did i mention? i suck at narratives. but i cant do argumentative and expository cos i dun haf enough general knowledge......=(
oh welllllll.... reading old blog post makes me think of how much life has changed for me, and how my life is like a sine graph.... and how happiness is a daily decision, just that i no longer haf much motivation to make it my decision..gawd knows why..=( oh well... ill try my best
600 post! nice number!
TEN to freedom!
i once said," hyperboliaokia i once was, hyperboliaokia i shall become again..soon. " hm... ill try my best. its probably just stupid os fault. everything will be ok after that....rite?
[edit]hmmm. ages since i posted lyrics.im finally back with lyrics! without music i tink i would have become deranged already.xD
PHOTOGRAPH
nickelback
Look at this photograph
Every time I do it makes me laugh
How did our eyes get so red?
And what the hell is on Joey’s head?
And this is where I grew up
I think the present owner fixed it up
I never knew we ever went without
The second floor is hard for sneakin’ out
And this is where I went to school
Most of the time had better things to do
Criminal record says I broke in twiceI
must’ve done it half a dozen times
I wonder if it’s too late
Should I go back and try to graduate?
Life’s better now than it was back then
If I was them, I wouldn’t let me in
Oh oh oh
Oh god I, I
Every memory of looking out the back door
I had the photo album spread out on my bedroom floor
It’s hard to say it
Time to say it
Goodbye, goodbye
Every memory of walking out the front door
I found the photo of the friend that I was looking for
It's hard to say it
Time to say it
Goodbye, goodbye
Goodbye
Remember the old Arcade
We Blew every dollar we that we ever made
The Cops hated us hanging out
They say somebody went and burned it down
We used to listen to the radio
And sing along with every song we’d know
We said someday we’d find out how it feels
To sing to more than just the steering wheel
Kim's the first girl I kissed
I was so nervous that I nearly missed
She’s had a couple of kids since then
I haven’t seen her since God knows when
Oh oh oh
Oh god I, I
Every memory of looking out the back door
I had the photo album spread out on the bedroom floor
It’s hard to say it
Time to say it
Goodbye, goodbye
Every memory of walking out the front door
I found the photo of the friend that I was looking forI
t's hard to say it
Time to say it
Goodbye, goodbye
I miss that townI
miss thair faces
you can't erase it you can't replace it
Im missing outI can't believe it
So hard to stay
Too hard to leave it
If I could relive those days
I know the one thing that would never change
Every memory of looking out the back door
I had the photo album spread out on my bedroom floor
It’s hard to say it
Time to say it
Goodbye, goodbye
Every memory of walking out the front door
I found the photo of the friend that I was looking for
It's hard to say it
Time to say it
Goodbye, goodbye
Look at this photograph
Every time I do it makes me laugh
Every time I do it makes me...
~
[em]ily_ 11:37 AM
Monday, November 6
oh one more thing, i forgot to congratulate my good tutees(: it would appear that they haf done their best this os! As are coming=p yup, now im almost outta job, just left with one more hist tutee.HAHA. oh wellllXD seeya!
[em]ily_ 6:32 PM
Someone demanded a report, someones not gna get it.HAHAHAHAHA. no lah, im so nice, ill give a report to entertain you.xD haha. okkkk but before that, yest was quite...er interesting?with little kids running everywhere, and me here trying to mug.wth-.-HAHA.xD oh man octopus meat@!!!!!!!! haha
ok today, ss and emaths, not too bad. emaths was kinda easy, amazing ly last nite slept well.xD oh well, i hope i din make careless mistakes, cos while i was checking there wass like quite a number of careless mistakes!!!! haha. and ss, ws... ok lah, good governance din come out:'( BUT THE THREE QUESTIONS WERE ACTUALLY FROM NICE CHAPTERS.xD sooo i happily did my education and welfare state! YAY!xD hahaha. hmm.. i finished it! LIKE WHOA.PHEW.xD and can you believe it, emily sama almost forgot the PURPOSE for reliability. ALMOST. WTH. i tink i was gonking out already lah! hahaha, how could i haf almost forgotten, but its al there. i really hope i gave enough evidence and elaborations.... *panics slightly* i need ss, so i cant scerw up!!!should be ok lah.
you know i realised one of the invilgilator, has weird cologne... its really WEIRD. not bad, just strange.hmm...haha.oh well.XD ok thennn ya inbetween iwas hiding at my section there. quite a good comfy corner.hahaha. not many ppl saw me. and stupid jeanette and sabo ditched me. boo. i waited for them, and they ditched me. grrrrrrr.hahaha, but they shall now be forgiven. and the funny thing i heard about musical evening from mrs chua was kinda...FUNNY. i kinda wish i would be there now to hear it.HAHA. it sounds damn SPAS LAH.xD hahaha.
anw my kor should be proud of me! i actually practised my rhytmn today inbetween my mugging, and while waiting for my teachers to collect my papers, i wonder if i can play though, later today die again. but aiya, i like his teaching, nice and strict, and straight to the point, he can hear EVERYTHING. and i cant;.HAHA. i tink hes getting exasperated, my rhtmn so sucks.HAHA.XD
hmmm. tmrs a break gtta mug hard, ENGLISH.o.0 die larh, that one im DAMN scared. MIRACLE! WAR! i meant the topic of war! not a real war!*touch wood* hahaha. expository on war rocks lah! i can go on and on, with sufficient facts and squeezing my opinions through and making sure that my readers understand me.hahaha.xD [and besides ss and hist is full of information!~]ohnwell! HAPPY MUGGING PPL! emily shall go do english and do some excercise! i MUST lose weight and arm blubber before prom![though jieling claims i lost a lot of weight! REALLY MEH!] hahaha.jiayoujiayoujioayou!!!!!! ALL THE WAYYYYYYYYY.XD
anw haf i look at this birthday baby thingy its kinda hilarious! haha, mines december, i did quite an analysis.=p forgive me if i contradict too much, im complicated, and i haf copmlications.HAHA. haf fun looking at yours, and take things with a pinch of salt, though for me mine is quite accurate, doesnt mean everyone elses are, it could be coincidence[though as the kuropon says there is no such thing as coincidences,only inevidability]
heck-ENJOY
---------------JANUARY BABY--------------------
pretty/handsome. Loves to dress up. Easily bored. Fussy. Seldom shows emotions. Takes time to recover when hurt. Sensitive. Down-to-Earth. Stubborn.
----------FEBRUARY BABY --------------------
Abstract thoughts. Loves reality and abstract. Intelligent and clever. Changing personality. Attractive. sexiest out of everyone. Temperamental. Quiet, shy and humble. Honest and loyal. Determined to reach goals. Loves freedom. Rebellious when restricted. Loves aggressiveness. Too sensitive and easily hurt. Gets angry really easily but does not show it. Dislikes unnecessary things. Loves making friends but rarely shows it. Horny. Daring and stubborn. Ambitious. Realizing dreams and hopes. Sharp. Loves entertainment and leisure. Romantic on the inside not outside. Superstitious and ludicrous. Spendthrift. Tries to learn to show emotions.
-----------------MARCH BABY --------------------
Attractive personality. sexy. Affectionate Shy and reserved. Secretive. Naturally honest, generous and sympathetic. Loves peace and serenity. Sensitive to others. Great kisser. Easily angered. Trustworthy. Appreciative and returns kindness. Hardly shows emotions. Tends to bottle up feelings. Observant and assesses others.
------------------APRIL BABY -------------------
Suave and compromising. Funny and humorous. Stubborn. Very talkative. Calm and cool. Kind and sympathetic. Concerned and detailed. Loyal. Does work well with others. Very confident. Sensitive. Positive Attitude. Thinking generous. Good memory. Clever and knowledgeable. Loves to look for information. Able to cheer evryone up and/or make them laugh. Able to motivate oneself and others. Understanding. Fun to be around. Outgoing. Hyper. Bubbly personality. Secretive. Boy/girl crazy. Loves sports, music, leisure and traveling. Systematic. hott but has brains.
-----------------MAY BABY -----------------
Stubborn and hard-hearted. Strong-willed and highly motivated. Sharp thoughts. Easily angered. Attracts others and loves attention. Deep feelings. Beautiful physically and mentally. Firm Standpoint. Needs no motivation. Shy towards oppisite sex. Easily consoled. Systematic (left brain). Loves to dream. Strong clairvoyance. Understanding. Sickness usually in the ear and neck. Good imagination. Good physical. Weak breathing. Loves literature and the arts. Loves traveling. Dislike being at home. Restless. Not having many children. Hardworking. High spirited.
------------JUNE BABY -------------
You've got the best personality and are an absolute pleasure to be around. You love to make new friends and be outgoing. You are a great flirt and more than likely have an a very attractive partner. a wicked hottie. It is also more than likely that you have a massive record collection. You have a great choice in films, and may one day become a famous actor/actress yourself - heck, you've got the looks for it!!!
----------------JULY BABY --------------
Fun to be with. Secretive. Difficult to fathom and to be understood. Quiet unless excited or tensed. Takes pride in oneself. Has reputation. Easily consoled. Honest. Concerned about people's feelings. Tactful. Friendly. Approachable. Emotional temperamental and unpredictable. Moody and easily hurt. Witty and sparkly. spazzy at times. Not revengeful. Forgiving but never forgets. dislikes nonsensical and unnecessary things. Guides others physically and mentally. Sensitive and forms impressions carefully. Caring and loving. Treats others equally. Strong sense of sympathy. Wary and sharp. Judges people through observations. Hardworking. No difficulties in studying. Loves to be alone. Always broods about the past and the old friends. Waits for friends. Never looks for friends. Not aggressive unless provoked. Loves to be loved. Easily hurt but takes long to recover.
------------AUGUST BABY ---------------
outgoing personality. takes risks. feeds on attention. no self control. kind hearted. self confident. loud and boisterous. VERY revengeful. easy to get along with and talk to. has an "every thing's peachy" attitude. likes talking and singing. loves music. daydreamer. easily distracted. Hates not being trusted. BIG imagination. loves to be loved. hates studying. in need of "that someone". longs for freedom. rebellious when withheld or restricted. lives by "no pain no gain" caring. always a suspect. playful. mysterious. "charming" or "beautiful" to everyone. stubborn. curious. independent. strong willed. a fighter.
------------SEPTEMBER BABY ---------------
Active and dynamic. Decisive and haste but tends to regret. Attractive and affectionate to oneself. Strong mentality. Loves attention. Diplomatic. Consoling, friendly and solves people's problems. Brave and fearless. Adventurous. Loving and caring. Suave and generous. Usually you have many friends. Enjoys to make love. Emotional. Stubborn. Hasty. Good memory. Moving, motivates oneself and others. Loves to travel and explore. Sometimes sexy in a way that only their lover can understand.
---------------OCTOBER BABY -------------------
Loves to chat. Loves those who love them. Loves to takes things at the center. Inner and physical beauty. Lies but doesn't pretend. Gets angry often. Treats friends importantly. Brave and fearless. Always making friends. Easily hurt but recovers easily. Daydreamer. Opinionated. Does not care to control emotions. Unpredictable. Extremely smart, but definitely the hottest AND sexiest of them all.
---------------NOVEMBER BABY --------------------
Trustworthy and loyal. Very passionate and dangerous. Wild at times. Knows how to have fun. Sexy and mysterious. Everyone is drawn towards your inner and outer beauty and independent personality. Playful, but secretive. Very emotional and temperamental sometimes. Meets new people easily and very social in a group. Fearless and independent. Can hold their own. Stands out in a crowd. Essentially very smart. Usually, the greatest men are born in this month. If you ever begin a relationship with someone from this month, hold on to them because their one of a kind.
---------------DECEMBER BABY ---------------
This straight-up means ur the most good-looking person possible... better than all of these other months! Loyal and generous. Patriotic. Competitive in everything.[i try not to be...] Active in games and interactions.[depends on hu im with] Impatient and hasty. Ambitious.[how many ppl is NEVER satified with their marks! even if the marks are quite good in the end?! ME] Influential in organizations. Fun to be with. Easy to talk to, though hard to understand.[oh trueeeeee!! SO TRUEEEE] Thinks far with vision, yet complicated to know.[look at my huge PLANS.but ya im very complicated, smths i cant even understand the basics of MYSELF.] Easily influenced by kindness.[quite lah.. thats why sometimes if ppl are too nice to me, die lah.] Polite and soft-spoken(NEVER.haha). Having lots of ideas.[ya lots of useless ideas]Sensitive. Active mind. Hesitating, tends to delay. Choosy and always wants the best. Temperamental.[LOOK AT MY MOODSWNIGS!] Funny and humorous[is lame counted anot?AHAHA]. Loves to joke. Good debating skills.[not bad lah] Has that someone always on his/her mind.[ive been like that..sincesince...like forever!] Talkative[quite]. Daydreamer[yupyup. i laugh at my daydreams all the time.]. Friendly. Knows how to make friends.[er i try?] Abiding.[quite lah...] Able to show character.[NO LOR.] one guy/girl kind of person.[hmmm..... i guess?] Loveable. Easily hurt.[thats what i hate about myself lah.] Prone to getting colds.[YA WHY ARH!] loves music.[ohhohoho, accurate!xD] pretty/handsome. Loves to dress up.[mayebe a bit?] Easily bored.[i can be quite fidgety.] Fussy. Seldom shows emotions.[why do you tink i hardly cry infront of others when im hurt, i cry is cos of times i scared shitless alr.] Takes time to recover when hurt. [ya. i hate this about myself too. happens allllll the time):]
key: bold-true
bold n large -VERY true
italics-quite true
[brackets] -personal comments
haha. ok jiayous ppl! FOR ME 14 more firggin papers, and ELEVEN MORE DAYS. FREEDOM IS ALMOST HERE
[em]ily_ 5:28 PM
Sunday, November 5
10 fell,
3 followed suit,
Right into the cotton bolster.
Twice remembered,
Thrice checked,
In the darkness of the late nights wrath.
One puffs up,
Ones still deflated,
Someones getting torn into pieces..
ok makes no sense, sorry, random ramblings,
but still goodluck for tmr ppl! SS and emaths! jiayoujiayou!!!! ALL THE BEST!
cannot let down the tsar and dr gek!xD
JIAYOU!
TWELVE more days
and thanks sam for yest! xD
[em]ily_ 11:07 AM
Saturday, November 4
boo. after the tunderstorms for the past few days i realised that i haf an annoying reaction to thunder. i like lightning, i dun like thunder.*shudders* strange as it is...sound should be the last im scared of....hahaha.xD oh well?
oh and crap larh. i feel damn .....haiz. im really becoming more loser by the day. if i was more aware of the need for fundamentals these past four years, maybe i wont be in such a terribl incorrigible state rite now. he may not be upset, but i surely am. i feel like such a let-down.argh. i nd to do smmth about this rubbish in me. jiayoujiayoujiayou...ill try my best...to jiayou.
tsk. i tink i AM getting stressed. cos like... retardedly my body is malfunctioning. its not like responding like a normal body should, and neither am i in a good state of mind. neither haf i been gettin good sleep, but i hafnt been hafing goodsleep for a few months already, so whats new?whats new is i need the sleep. i swear im panicking. for EVERY subj. theres no single factor if i would state social-studies;ly. everything is interlinked. every subj just makes me freak out more for the other. cos when icant rmb i start worrying about whether i haf time to worry about the rest.-.-
grrrrr. and gawd. bio and geog is the most murderous. followed by ss.
im so stressed up. esp last nite wtf. i was so pissed with myself in more ways then one. argh.
emiy! START MAKING YOUR HEAD PARTIALLY PERMEABLE! BIG KNOWLEDGE MOLECULES OF KNOWLEDGE SHOULD BE STORED IN YOUR BRAIN, and ABSORB ALL THE SMALL BITS< AND CONVERT THEM AND STORE THEM. DUN LOSE ANYMORE !!!!!!! ARGH.
ojk enough said, lots to do. i really filled with.... panic.
as the song said ...
and some say they dun know...
yup same for me, i dunno what im gna do about this probel, and i haf no idea how to handle it either.but im trying im trygin!): i wish trying would help.
[em]ily_ 4:43 PM
boo. after the tunderstorms for the past few days i realised that i haf an annoying reaction to thunder. i like lightning, i dun like thunder.*shudders* strange as it is...sound should be the last im scared of....hahaha.xD oh well?
oh and crap larh. i feel damn .....haiz. im really becoming more loser by the day. if i was more aware of the need for fundamentals these past four years, maybe i wont be in such a terribl incorrigible state rite now. he may not be upset, but i surely am. i feel like such a let-down.argh. i nd to do smmth about this rubbish in me. jiayoujiayoujiayou...ill try my best...to jiayou.
tsk. i tink i AM getting stressed. cos like... retardedly my body is malfunctioning. its not like responding like a normal body should, and neither am i in a good state of mind. neither haf i been gettin good sleep, but i hafnt been hafing goodsleep for a few months already, so whats new?whats new is i need the sleep. i swear im panicking. for EVERY subj. theres no single factor if i would state social-studies;ly. everything is interlinked. every subj just makes me freak out more for the other. cos when icant rmb i start worrying about whether i haf time to worry about the rest.-.-
grrrrr. and gawd. bio and geog is the most murderous. followed by ss.
im so stressed up. esp last nite wtf. i was so pissed with myself in more ways then one. argh.
emiy! START MAKING YOUR HEAD PARTIALLY PERMEABLE! BIG KNOWLEDGE MOLECULES OF KNOWLEDGE SHOULD BE STORED IN YOUR BRAIN, and ABSORB ALL THE SMALL BITS< AND CONVERT THEM AND STORE THEM. DUN LOSE ANYMORE !!!!!!! ARGH.
ojk enough said, lots to do. i really filled with.... panic.
as the song said ...
and some say they dun know...
yup same for me, i dunno what im gna do about this probel, and i haf no idea how to handle it either.but im trying im trygin!): i wish trying would help.
[em]ily_ 4:43 PM
Friday, November 3
im kinda like woah. the work i did today not bad. hohoho.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY T O MY MUM.
(like she reads it.but oh well)
err............. frigging stressed up. argh. ok back to work, back to work.
emily you're one screwed up girl. haiz.
when will the continous canopy of doubt finally break
and fill me with rays of hope?
[em]ily_ 5:59 PM
Thursday, November 2
ive decided to start a countdown to nco pop! hohoho. i hope alot of ppl go back!! it'll be so cool! haha can go and bully siao again.HAHAHA.XD EIGHT DAYS. and i miss mummy!!HHAHAHA. and i miss the good ole toilet sign, i wonder if the signs still there? okok i shouldnt start! or i wont end!HAHA.
you know ive reaslied theres this cycle, every nite i tell myself okok, tmr il wake up at 630! i must i must, then morning, alarm will wake me up at 630 then ill reset it to 7 then at 7 ill shut it and fall back aslp. then il wake up at 830, and then il be like greeeeeeaattt. hahha.and then il start rushing like crazee.HAHA. oh welll, today no lyrics, so sad rite! HAHA. im just too lazy to find lyrics... hahaa.
been mugging ss, kinda worried about it, and please dun talk about me being good in ss, more the reason for me to be scared larh. its sup to be my ace sub, so if i screw up, then the rest..die lah? cos ting isnt marking it! then like that! i die!!! i hope not of cos. its essential i score well for combined!!! haha. ok *tries not to panic any more* ugh, but ive hardly done eng pract,and im damn worried lah.... im very scared of screwing eng up... after all my english has been screwing up continously.. i hope i did do well in oral i need that to score....i hope.oh bother.
bassclar=love
whee! my days just brighten up a lil bit! emilys super happy! HAHA. but im still worried that i cant play in time, cos my tonguing still sucks big time. i need to do some work on it,FAST. and then il haf to work on rhytmn. tonite i shall play a bit. HAHA. ok or maybe im slacking too much...see how see how, if i can finish my physics a few chaps then maybeeee.xD hahha. okok i guess i ebtter get back to reading, and mugging. physics is freaking me out now.ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.. damn scared for physics..*shudders* oh well... il just try my best! all the way!
goodluck to those taking music tomorrow!!!!
.FIFTHTEEN MORE TO FREEDOM.
[em]ily_ 1:43 PM
Wednesday, November 1
ok after all the horrid thing happened, something good happened.
THANKS ALOT KOR FOR BRINGING HOME THE BASS CLAR!!!!!!!!!!!
he got hurt becuase of it larh! owch. ok back to tonguing while reading bio. double intensive starts today!xD
[em]ily_ 10:02 PM
goodluck to all those taking lit tmr!!!!! jiayous!!!! anw the next part would be filled with laments and stuff, so dun read it if you dun want to, i haf some lyrics below, scarlet form ayashino ceres.jap/eng .
i feel like. erm. crap. yar thats the word. todays a really bad day. not entirely as in bad luck, just like those "I have no idea what in the world im doing" or "why in the world do I exist" kind of days. Those rubbish kind of days that you feel like if you got knocked down, it doesnt matter at all.Ya that kind of terrible, shitty days. But no worries, im not suicidal.. yet.hahaha.
Like this morning, i woke up at 630! i was super happy, and by some weird reasoning, i FELL BACK ASLEEP.wow! and the dream wasnt so happening either, like in the middle of no where i was going to sit on a MRT seat, when suddenly i turned behind, and i was like GOD, ITS A FREAKING HUMAN HEAD.and all that rubbish. In fact the dream was so fantasy like, which was kind of cool and all, but still, overall its not a good dream, trust me. Then when i woke up it was 830! and i was like, GRRRRREAAATT. then nevermind il make do with it, so i started on bio, wow so fun. Then I FELL ASLEEP! four hours after i woke up, i FELL ASLEEP! GREAT, and somehow the computers music was blasting like shit, and when i was checked, i was like WTH its at max volume! then i was aready in this wthwthwth mood, then i was like nvm, better hurry and go eat lunch. then when i walk to eat my good ole noodles, i tried to make up with my sleep, by telling my mum boring bio stories. like mircoorganisms, all the different ways of making food, and i forget a lot of stuff. then nvm. go back, i tried my best to mug alot. then in the end 2 chaps, ok nvm, then i was going off for piano!
guess what! IT WAS RAINING CATS AND DOGS. and i was like GREAT. so i went out in jeans and my windbreaker, and my waterproof bag, and then i hurried off. i was just walking under buildings to reach the stairs, and before the time iwas truly surviving by just my umbrella, i was soaked through alreadt. my jeans changed colour, and my bag too, and iwas like wow! the winds real power today! and true enough as i walked to the busstpo the winds were howling and the rains were destroying me the umbrella was redundant. i almost got splashed by a car. i walked through floods and when i got onto the bus, it was empty, and it was frigging cold. YAY. here i was dripping, and my entire body shivering already, and im in a cold empty bus. so fun rite.
then piano was ok, except i had no idea wat i was doing for scales, i just played according to the book, with no idea wat i was doing. and my stomach ache came back, it only dsappeared when i left. then after lesson i jurried i wanted to catch the early bus, and because of that i almost sprained my friggin ankle! and i missed the bus. and great on the bus, it was crowded, so it wouldnt be so cold, by rite, rite? NO. i was having chills, shivering like crazy, and my teeth were CHATTERING. and my clothes by the way, werent dried YET.after 2odd hours. then heck, i was nearly home, and i was hoping to seek comfort in he warmth of my house.
but no! im so sorry, i forgot, yoga lessons more impt to you then whether im so wet until i haf a cold, i was almost forced not to bathe n go for dinner. what shit is that. but i still manageed to bathe, and i rushed so that someone wouldnt b late for her oh-so-impt yoga class.and my hair was like in a horrible mess, and i swear, my mood was so sour, i tink it was force than squeezing 100 lemons in a persons mouth. the stingray i had for dinner, was so bland, and my beehoon, wasnt as wet as always, it was so dry, it tasted like it wasnt even cooked. great, i feel like im on cloud nine.not il telly ou what can make this life so much better, something like suddenly this comp screws up on me after i type this post, or msn suddenly shuts, or suddenly the comp screen just disappears. or better still a bird or huge insect decides to tour the house suddenly and all the rubbish.
and yay, im behind time in mugging. i assure you, i was trying really hard to make my day better, by pushing away all the bad stuff, and by trinyg to think good nice thoughts, but in the end, a cold house is the straw that broke the camels my back. GAWD I HATE BIO. ok im sorry for all those who haf to suffer reading this crap and all my whinings and complains. argh... im gna catch a cold now, really.yay, my muscles hurt too. wowee i feel like the star is so bright today.crap. im at the opposite of the peak to put it nicely.
oh and i just realised why i dun want the break to come, only ONE reason, its that i know with all the free time ill think of all kind of rubbish.already know i tink of quite alot of rubbish. so when break starts the rubbish will multiply like million times. and then really shit.my life will go upside down, and im worried ya, im worried i cant play anymore, im worried ill let down ppl. im scared, honestly speaking.haiz... cos now i really cant pract much. im struggingling with my studies alr...so like whee. gawd im at sacarstic peak today.oh damn. nvm... i tink i better shutup now, all this nonsense.... haiz...
anw some lyrics
SCARLET
[english lyrics in brackets]jap in bold
from:ayashino ceres
Sung by: Iwao Junko
~
haruka na hoshizora ni yume wa mada miemasu ka?
[Can you still see your dreams in the distant, starry sky?]
osanai ano hi yori azayaka desu ka?
[Are they more vivid than they were when you were little? ]
mune ni afurete tsunoru omoi
[When one forgets to put the emotions that overflow in her heart]
nemuri wasurete jounetsu no iro
[to rest, they burn the color of passion.]
tatoe tookute mo kitto tadoritsukeru tsuyoku shinjite'ta
[I used to believe without a doubt that I could reach my dreams, no matter how far off they were.]
ano hi no watashi ga ima mo kokoro de nemutte-iru
[But that me from long ago now sleeps inside my heart. ]
GARASU no bara yori mo hakanakute moroi no ni
[Dreams are more fragile and fleeting than a glass rose,]
yume miru koto wa naze sadame na no deshou
[so then why are we destined to dream? ]
futatsu no yume ga ai ni natte
[Sometimes two dreams can turn into love,]
ai ni narenai koto mo atte
[but there are also times when they can't.]
hito wa hitori da to wakariaitai no ni nante muzukashii
[Even when they're alone, people want to share their feelings, but it can be so hard.]
kotoba wa muryoku de toki ni wa gin no NAIFU ni naru
[Words are powerless to express one's feelings, and sometimes they become a silver knife.]
hito wa hitori da to wakariaitai no ni nante muzukashii
[Even when they're alone, people want to share their feelings, but it can be so hard.]
kotoba wa muryoku de toki ni wa gin no NAIFU ni naru
[Words are powerless to express one's feelings, and sometimes they become a silver knife.]
tatoe tookute mo kitto tadoritsukeru tsuyoku shinjite'ta
[I used to believe without a doubt that I could reach my dreams, no matter how far off they were.]
ano hi no watashi ga ima mo kokoro de nemutte-iru
[But that me from long ago now sleeps inside my heart. ]
~
http://www.animelyrics.com/anime/ayashinc/ancscar.htm
k back to my stack of work.='( anw im really sorry about the rubbish above. just ignore me.its just one of the bad days, dun mind me.but still much apologies.
[em]ily_ 8:03 PM
Tuesday, October 31
ARGH THE NOSTALGIA!
[em]ily_ 8:19 PM
enjoy~
hallo! now its laurel hu asks for an update over CHEM PRACT-.- ookkkkk..... chem pract was.... OK? haha. but wth when i went in i saw the bottle of purple luiquid, and i was like... shit. manganate. you should haf seen the sink! it was a WORK OF ART after i was done with it, and the deionised water bottle! the purle-turning-brown stains were everywhere! completely screwed lah.purple every where and brown too! i feel bad to those whos gna haf to really scrub them. ow. but manganates damn messy! haha. and the hydrogen peroxides damn cute.I LIKE. all the gas!xD and i like iron (III) chloride now! SO DAMN ORANGE! it rocks!!!!!!hahaha.its like damn nice!haha but my titration readings a bit off.i hope its still within level two.PLEASE!!!!! hahaha.
blame it on me being a family-ish person. i guess its just in my inability to accept ppl who value their work over family.. sorry about that. its just that, i still feel that fine, work is impt, and stuff and that you want to arr the family stuff to ensure it doesnt coincide with your academics stuff, but that doesnt mean that you DONT go. i mean, familys everything. they arent gna be there for you forever! and yet, they are always the ones to stick through you, thick or thin.even if your face gets burned until you look like a monster, or even if you failed you pract, even if you contract some weird disease. so smths, maybe i cant stand it when someone treats their family.. like.. i dunno, like you did. i mean ya smths how parents do things that annoy us,(its the adolescence after all.) but, after all that, they are still trying their best, to do wats best for you. my only advice left i guess, is that, just make sure you dont regret it, but even if you do, i gues it's not my problem, after all its your life rite? i guess im just being too..opionated. but then again i cant help but saying that peeps, try to treasure your family, even if they annoy you until you feel like killing them, but aft all its just a phase, and deep down, the intentions all good...rite? oh bother again, maybe its just cos im too family orientated? haha.
oh and about the blog skin, plain like paper, but i like, kinda represents my life now, plain, and boring. white and grey not white and black, meaning my lifes not that simple after all, despite all the appearances and stuff. but, oh well.XD ive been thinking of weird stuff all the time now.. dreaming of nostalgic memories from wayyy back when i was a kid, a p school nemesis one after another, and then gaogao de.haiz.i tink im holding to tightly to my childhood past(gawd i sound so old.) oh well back when i was much younger, and def more innocent... HAHA.
ok i still got lots to do today, amaths, ss and geog. late ntie tonite, but still! im so frigging bored, and tired of this. and at nite, mugging, is really lonely can! but then again, i know if i over sms or call someone, or spend too long infront of the comp(even if im mugging infront of the comp), i wont really mug. soo... i gtta do my best rite? haha.oh well, one shot at it, im not gna miss it! YAR. jiayou emily! and everyone else!
if you want to make the world a better place, look at yourself and then make the change.
rite! jiayoujiayoujiayou~~FIGHTO!~
ok and wats with me and lyrics!!! HAHA. heres another set!xDits all rockapellas fault! HAHA. everytime i hear their music, i suddenly LOVE those songs and the lyrics! haha.oh gawd, rockapella ROCKS!!!!!<33333>
HELP!
-beatles-
Help, I need somebody.
Help, not just anybody.
Help, you know I need someone, help!
When I was younger..
so much younger than today.
I never needed anybody's help in any way..
But now these days are gone, I'm not so self assured,
Now I find I've changed my mind and opened up the doors.
Help me if you can, I'm feeling down..
And I do appreciate you being round..
Help me get my feet back on the ground..
Won't you please, please help me.
And now my life has changed in oh so many ways,
My independence seems to vanish in the haze.
But every now and then I feel so insecure,
I know that I just need you like I've never done before.
Help me if you can, I'm feeling down,
And I do appreciate you being round.
Help me get my feet back on the ground,
Won't you please, please help me.
When I was younger so much younger than today,
I never needed anybody's help in any way.
But now these daya are gone, I'm not so self assured.
Now I find I've changed my mind and opened up the doors.
Help me if you can, I'm feeling down,
And I do appreciate you being round.
Help me, get my feet back on the ground.
Won't you please, please help me, help me, help me, ooh.
~
look out for a new blogskin after olevels!=D
[em]ily_ 4:49 PM
Monday, October 30
chemistry! may it be alright.XD nah it should be ok, if i just flip through. i hope design is EASY.XD hohoho. ok, im gna start chem pract revision after this. been doing physics whole day, and the whole day i was like.shitshitshit. hafnt marked yet, tmr then il see, the REAL horrible results.*shudders*
oh man i love rockapella!AND THEY"RE COMING TO SINGAPORE! THATS WHY IM SO SAD. IM SOSOSOSOSOSO SAD. cos they are performing... on an exam nite.
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
did i mention? IM SO FRIGGING SAD.sobssobssobssobs.
ok enough whining, actually i dun really haf much to say anymore. but... GOODLUCK FOR TMRS CHEM PRACT EVERYBODY. please, no explosions! haha. so cliche.haha. and erm.... i dunno~ EIGHTEEN MORE DAYS. PERSEVERE! ENGARDE!~ i can do this i can so do this. i hope so.HAHA. im like really confident, then suddenly. change my mind. hoho, i told you im getting very conflicting.HAHA. pleaseplease! I WANNA SLEEP TONITE! (for the past two practs, i hafnt slept a WINK.) ok i better mug chem, tonites an early nite, for sure. so i must finish everything, i dun want to regret anything.yup.XD
JIAYOUS EVERYONE!
toodles~
[add on]waitwait!HAHA. CHECK OUT THE LYRICS XD
BLAH BLAH BLAH
Scott Leonard
It started out real sweet;I worshipped at your feet
Swore that you had hung the moon
But after we'd begun, I wasn't having fun
I fear we may have peaked too soon
Why you wanna go and do me like you do
Why you wanna beat me blue
When you talk all I hear is Blah Blah Blah
Baby you got nothin to say
You're makin sound good and loud now, I can't make it out
Your lips are workin fine, but when you talk---blah blah
I hear you talkin, you say Blah, blah, blah, blah
I hear you talkin, you say Blah, blah, blah, blah
My hopes were ridin high--I ain't a picky guy
And you appeared to be a dream
Unhappily instead, you pounded on my head
You certainly ain't what you seem
Why you wanna go and do me like you do
Why you wanna beat me blue
When you talk all I hear is Blah Blah Blah
Baby you got nothin to say
You're makin sounds good and loud now, I can't make it out
Your lips are workin fine, but when you talk---blah blah
When you talk all I hear is Blah Blah Blah
Baby you got nothin to say
You're makin sounds good and loud now, I can't make it out
Your lips are workin fine, but when you talk
There was a time when all the moons were pink with apricotton skies
There was a time when all the world would think we held the reasons why
And still I'm back each day; perhaps we'll find a way
Maybe we'll see eye to eye--maybe you'll start thinkin my way
But then I hear the drone of your naggin monotone
I'd rather go out back and die
Why you wanna go and do me like you do
Why you wanna beat me blue
When you talk all I hear is Blah Blah Blah
Baby you got nothin to say
You're makin sounds good & loud now, I can't make it out
Your lips are workin fine, but when you talk---blah blah
When you talk all I hear is Blah Blah Blah
Baby you got nothin to say
You're makin sounds good and loud now, I can't make it out
Your lips are workin fine, but when you talk---blah blah
(repeat)
Talkin, blah, blah
Baby you got nothin to say, I can't make it
Blah, Blah, the way you talk
Blah, blah, talkin blah, blah
Baby you got nuthin to say
http://www.rockapella.com/rockapella-new/CMS/lyrics/blah.txt
ITS HILARIOUS. and im SURE YOU ALL AGREE. hohoho. that'll be the fate of me and my naggy mouth.HAHAHAHAHA. oooooooooohhhhhhh wellllllllll.XD its in my genes!*runs*
[em]ily_ 6:05 PM
Sunday, October 29
hallooo. tmrs the chinese cum higher chinese paper..isit? HAHA. a bit confused. nvm. jiayous anyways to all the chinese ppl. esp those ppl who first time sitting for an olevel paper, and this being their ONLY chinese ppr(aka the luckypigs raffles ppl that i know.) for them it'll be over soon.
mine too. in 19 more days. but nvm, it was better than when i started my counter at 200 over days.i cant wait for this to end like seriously. only problem, is that im not done mugging, and i only just recently started panicking! hohoho im dead(and shit, im starting to use hohoho too much.) my bros at camp! i tink.xD oh bother oh bother, i did some research on bio past years papers, and i realised that transport in flowering plants seems to haf come out almost all the time! like 80%of the papers i haf HAF that topic. hmmm. what does it mean? i haf no idea~ =p i shouldnt place TOO much bets on that. anw im scared for bio, did i tell you that?? hahahaha. and physics! and ENGLISH-the freakiest. cos tis L1 after all, nth i do can change taht its L1. shit.hahaha. buttttt.oh well. please please.HAHA. im starting to panick only now, thats stupidcan. and argh the cramps are back, ahow apt to study chap 21 of bio.
and dreaming of childhood nemesis! WTH im dreaming of really random things nowadays. and i dont know why! all the weird weird things are infiltrating my stupid dreams.grrr.must be stress. and menses. and ALL THE CRAP. oh crap.HAHA. ok. i guess i should continue mugging, im far from finished for today, shit i tink il end up sleeping at 1 tonite. but i MUST wake up at 630 tmr. need to prepare myself for early mornings on exam days. mustmust. but anw. back to SS and bio! but before that, heres emilys latest FAVOURITE song.(strangely its always a song that really annoys me alot at the same time! HAHA. ive been conflicting myself as much as communism confluicts capitalist.)
enjoy~
PERHAPS LOVE
-Placido Domingo and John Denver-
(Placido Domingo)
Perhaps love is like a resting place
A shelter from the storm
It exists to give you comfort
It is there to keep you warm
And in those times of trouble
When you are most alone
The memory of love will bring you home
(John Denver)
Perhaps love is like a window
Perhaps an open door
It invites you to come closer
It wants to show you more
And even if you lose yourself
And don't know what to do
The memory of love will see you through
(Placido Domingo)
Oh, Love to some is like a cloud
To some as strong as steel
(John Denver)
For some a way of living
For some a way to feel
(Placido Domingo)
And some say love is holding on
And some say letting go
And some say love is everything
And some say they don't know
(John starts joined by Placido)
Perhaps love is like the ocean
Full of conflict, full of pain
Like a fire when it's cold outside
Thunder when it rains
If I should live forever
And all my dreams come true
My memories of love will be of you
(Placido Domingo)
And some say love is holding on
And some say letting go
(John Denver)
And some say love is everything
Some say they don't know
(John starts joined by Placido)
Perhaps love is like the ocean
Full of conflict, full of pain
Like a fire when it's cold outside
Or thunder when it rains
If I should live forever
And all my dreams come true
My memories of love will be of you.........
[em]ily_ 8:31 PM
Friday, October 27
heylow.heyhigh. emilys holidays are kinda packed already, so sorry if you cant book me anymore, buttttt. fear not there is still a possibility that i may be able to still haf some days off, surely. haha. hopefully. concertsconcerts. maybee.xD wonder wheter il be ableto go for musical evening. class chalet. oh well. yet after intensive pianoin the hols, il still haf like..10 more replacements. crazee lah. i tink, il probably end up like...finishing up another 20 after grade 8.i hope i pass.i just need 101. or 100. as long as they tell me, grade eight-PASS. i happy already, i dun ask for very much more in piano.strangely. thats how it is.
played some segment from shostakovich in sight reading.lol my teacher taught i would screw it all up cos its super clashy. but even tho i din realise it was from shostakovich i could play all the clashyclashy thingy, cos i oculd still hear a melody(not like TWO of my three piano pieces now.), maybe its cos ive heard it before, or maybe i just heard it.i tink its the former.haha.
and i know i know,everyones saying, emily you're CRAZY, hafing piano lessons NOW. and im like i know its damn crappy, but i haf 20 odd replacements earlier on, after today its 18. not bad, and after the hols if i udn miss anyone of them its 10.then i hope registration starts in march.and theni can finish this 20 off. after that. its like normal until about august/september. and then probably a heck lot more of replacements, and then by end of this year, im done.gawd. im so looking forward to finishing this stupid thihng, cos my mum wont let me stop otherwise, even with my hectic schedule, and im not happy about it. i swear, im gna fail my promos, and i dun care wat my mum says about time is how you maanage it. im blaming it on piano. i dun care, that'll be damn crappy, but hell.ill go nuts. ok or maybe im just making a big fuss over it. but grade eight alarh, not as slacky slacky as all the other grades, like the rest fail, then hu cares.this one fail, i SWEAR my mum will make me repeat until its finished(thats after a good thrashing, where il haf to really, face the music.) which darn i swear ill sceam and rebel against that one.oh gawd, no more please.
~
i stayed up everynight,
with the past haunting me every second.
no matter how hard i tried,
at every waking hour it was there to bring me tears.
but if i dont let it all go,
and if i ever give up,
i know its gonna slowly eat me up,
till theres nothing left in my heart.
so i guess ill keep trying.
and moving forward despite each dying day.
Just keep going on and on,
until i can feel the suns warmth again.
~
feels and sounds like rubbish. oh well. was just watching a show and then i decided to pen this down. buttttttttttttttttttttt. heck i know shuzhens gna talk rot on my board bcos of this(do a miracle shuzhen, and DONT tlak rot on my board about this?) oh well.yawn, i tink my body cant take it anymore. ok back to geog.
toodles~
[add on, or you could say..PS]
did i mention? i was looking through my music library, and then there was a nicenice solo track, some sax concerto,cyber bird or smth like that. oh my gawd, its so damn cool.hohoho. but that of cos it good, its played by my hero!<3 nobuya!!!!!(tsktsk emily going after an older guy?) hehhheh. cant help it that im a contemporary nobuya supporter.xD he rocks my socks!!!!<3 until i hear a better solo, a MUCH better solo.nobuya will still be my only.HAHA.
ok damn whats with me, sorryysorry, must haf been exam stress, ok that was the nonsensical ramblings of emily. but still! NOBUYA<3 =p
[em]ily_ 8:53 PM
Thursday, October 26
so someone demanded for an update.. about physics practical.-.-'
ok so LimMinCho DID do smth good for us in the end, he spotted the question. lucky for me praba was going through it in the hall(i was sleeping, cant expect me to haf rmbed what he said rite.haha.). and hey presto! the question came out! at first i was worried. (after screwing up prelims!) but oh well it turned out ok i guess.
and after a gazillion dingdings from the rolling sphere, and frustration over the stopwatch and the humans natural inability called reaction time. and like WTH is it a curve or sa straight line, and the table which is so messy tt i cant stand it. the woman finally said that ITS OVER. and i was like. its over? YAY.
but sometimes i must say that its REALLY annoying when the examiner says STOP WRITING. and yet, some damn person just keeps on writing and calculating, and somehow, just SOMEHOW doesnt get caught! wth. hu wouldnt want those extra few mins if they havent finished their paper! but its frigging unfair that she can somehow smuggle those few mins in, while others just stare at the empty papers feeling depressed and helpless. SHES DONE IT FOR LIKE- A GAZILLION TIMES ALR. and im sorry, i just am so annoyed it pains me to think so incorrigibly(wth-.-) that i hope she DOES get caught and fall into a bowl of hot soup for it. damn mean rite. ya i agree, but thats exactly wat i feel. and really, i just hopes she stop doing it again. or else i swear the next time you'll see a hand shoot up.
its just not fair to others.
man tmr got piano again. so not in the mood for piano.
haiiii. ok back to amaths...theres something weird about this question.
happy shuzhen? ive updated.xD
[em]ily_ 8:03 PM
Wednesday, October 25
oh gosh. i just realised like.
TOMORROW.
im so not prepared for tomorrow. and after like failing a gazillion practicals already, (and i realised that my horriblehorrible score for prelims was infact because i FAILED physics practical) and plus ive completely lost touch with physics practical. then tomorrow.. HOW?! sigh, when we were redoing last min pract, really wished that we had physics!!! (tzy must have been feeling lazy or smth-.-) argh. im feeling soooooooo insecure and freaked out. i swear, tonight cannot sleeo again.. DIE LAH. then end up like prelims, this never read, taht never see. and you know, what about significant figures again? *scratches head* i thought i got it rite this time but instead they just minused about 10 odd poins from allllll the physics papers... ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh
okok chillll....(its hard to in this sun and haze) at least the psi went down last nite to 41 or smth like that. hopefully it wont "cloud" my brain like its clouding the sky..
afternoon-piano. DIE LARH never practise!! (for almost 3 weeks.) after the wedding, and getting damn busy and stuff.(part of which are only excuses of cos.) copmletely lost touch.. hopefully shes in a good mood today. or else surely die liao.
ohhh welllll back to panicking for TOMORROW.
jiayous to everyone else who has physics pract tmr!(may the light NOT be with you, iow COME OUT ELECTRICITY DUN WANT LIGHT!!!!!!!!!!!!!)
toodles!
[em]ily_ 9:35 AM
Tuesday, October 24
one idea: stupid stupid stupid school.
asking us to do an eng compo mock after physics! im gna faint! and plus, its not like they are gna mark ANYWAY. everything from post prelims are so not marked or returned.
hafnt seen a marked compo back in my hands yet. wth. its like, they tell us to work work yet they dun give us our work!WTH.
ok back to geog back to geog.
[em]ily_ 1:27 PM
Monday, October 23
gawd, ive never has such a horrible stomachache and such horrible diarrhoea before. like wth. it felt like chicken wings were pulling my stomach apart.-.- cos of yesyest chicken wings i swear that MUST haf been those chicken wings on saturday.. AND NOW MY TUMMY.. ok no YEST MY TUMMY WAS MURDERING ME.like id haf rather died lah! now i so dun feel like getting pregnant, that one is gonna kill!
i almost blanked out yest. but then again, i slept the entire day so i guess it made no difference from sleeping. and stuff like my kor using that abs machine thingy and pretending its a machine gun and shooting at me.it wasnt a dream ok-.-
oh but watched a korean movie yest(my mum forbidded me to study yest-.-) quite hilarious lah ya. and finally for once, that idiot didnt CRY. omg. that actor is seriously only good at crying.*shudders.oh wellll...okk now emily shall go eat her porridge..i mean rice in hot water wth carrots and cabbage.xD
its not bad lah.only that there isnt much taste thats all.=p
[em]ily_ 9:46 AM
Friday, October 20
wahlau the haze killed me. i had to chase after my mum to pass her the umbrella. then run and run. and after that i was DYING. wahlaos.its like running in air that has only 1%oxygen .annoying. ok today, i must do more work. and be moremore discipline. I CAN DO IT. i tink. sobs.
ya ok. last episode last episode and then REALLY PROPER work ill start.i must i must, i will i will. AHHHHHHHHH.
[em]ily_ 11:11 AM
Thursday, October 19
woah just came abck from esplanade(ok not really after 20mins i got like chased out-.-HAHA.) and like woah. esplanade is super conducive! if it wasnt for the annoyin travelling,i wont mind going there EVERYDAY. mugging there rocks larh!xD wheee.
ok ill try my best to do what i need to mug.haha. yuppers. boo.
the purpose statement is like sticking in my head larh.. woahhh=p
and tsubasa music damndamndamn nice. i think i said this before rite.HAHA. wheeeeeeee... ok damn tired. shall take a short breather, dinner then mugging here i come!(you know i like doing past years amaths papers. i just hate doing otehr schools papers, ok not really lah. more like MY school's.-.-)
toodles!
[em]ily_ 7:29 PM
Wednesday, October 18
i just read this article about smth like how maids are doing everything for the children, like flushing the toliets and tying their shoelaces. and seriously i find that to be particularly amusing, and immensely retarded. i tink that the saddest outcome of ones childhood is not really the amount of possessions they obtained, the amount of As they achieved nad neither isit the certificates tehy obtained. a sad childhood is not wholly of one who had to endure severe hardships and had to mature faster than their counterparts are. Rather those who are unable to mature and learn how to depend on their own to be the most pathetic and saddest bunch. Childhood is the time where you learn things, and slowly reduce your dependence on parents, nad maids for sure. by the time you "mature" technically u should be able to support yourself whether economically, socially, or even just how to flush the toilet and tie your own shoelaces. as my mum used to tell me when i was young"i aint gna be there for you forever you know, even if i stayed by you all the way." it makes perfect sense that children should learn how to be responsible for their self and belongings.
I think its quite sad when you hear of children who are unable to look after their own self and are unable to brush their own teeth, flush their own toilets or tie their shoelaces, or maybe even button their own shirts. For some not having the responsiblity to do such things may seem like a form of bliss and to be lucky. But really just how lucky are they? How happy isit? that you have to live a life depending on others because you cant look after your ownself.
Isnt the best outcome of childhood, to be able to stand tall on your own and care for yourself and others who are important to you? Oh well
ok sorry taht was just a bunch of crappy musings from emily pooi. shes a bit conky these few days, had better sleep last nite, but not to say the nightmares had disappeared. They just arent abot equations nor filled with morbidity. its more like wth kind of nightmares. and the kind like...vicecity. i swear its vicecitys fault. everything was in so much detail and so accurate. and wayyy too fast paced for a normal dream to be.which is damndamn annoying.
lalala. hsitory is freaking me out, cos the new set of notes, there are lotsa stuff there that we ought to know, but i dont know very well. like the conferences and USSR, or the effects of the conferences on germany, and otehr stuff. it makes me feel kind of panicky. oh welll. geoggeoggeog. histhisthist. stalinstalinstalin! BRBRBR. DRDRDR. MAOMAOMAO. omg-.-
hahaha.i managed t o play it without any form of emotion. not bad alr.XD hahaha. okkkkkk tilll laterrrrrr. my kors coming home tonite. there goes the computer. its a blessing a blessing. or maybe a route to self destruction=p OKOK enough of emilys nonsense, like alot of rubbish today!
KOKE MIAN HERE I COME! yumm
[em]ily_ 12:19 PM
Tuesday, October 17
even though this was on my hist book for ages, it still strikes me alotalot.
For the Fallen, by Laurence Binyon
They shall not grow old,
as we that are left behind to grow old:
Age shall not weary them,
nor the years condemn.
death has always been that crude eh.. oh well... as long as certain ppl*hinthint* realise how horrid war is. and how impt peace is and stop talking cock that they do. maybe wars will never occur again. and yet again, maybe wars are just part of the worlds cycle and will continue to aunt the humans, for as long as this world keeps on spinning.
[em]ily_ 9:38 PM
this morning when i woke up, the key thing was i felt like ive been injected with novacain and someone cracked my head open with a quartz rock, removed my brain and created a mechanism that made me feel like there was smth in there though all taht was inside is just head juice.
and that was because i lacked sleep. i hafnt been getting much sleep. its like you're asleep, but actually you arent asleep. in other words you can safely say, you din sleep. ya. how nice. and ive been hafing nightmares, and morbid dreams. like not understanding equations and like ppl stuffing equations into my head. and likedeathscenes, and FORGETTING TO BRING ENTRY PROOFS. morbid dreams, of death.. and stuff. making my sleep worse than worst. to add on my awake state isnt very good either.
then just now. i took a 2hour nap. and now i feel GOOD. whoot. ok im still depressed over bio. but. like woah.after that nap i felt like the world is turning again.HAHA.
but bio.. is so screwed! i mean like the two of emilys worst came out. accuracy. and slicing thin rubbish. and now i proclaimed that id rather haf a dragon fruit, a shrimp or a frigging flower. can you believe that. im hopeless. and the last design question i had no idea wahts it talkign aobut. i wrote crap, that seriously even if it wasnt written there, it wouldnt make a difference. and etcetc. all the questions made no sense to me.seriously. screwed.
oh well anw, tonites the last nite il be using. cos tmr my laoahpek kor is coming back(wonder if he has a new arm?) oh well which means that im going to work xiong-er like seriously. brrr. the cold future. oh well. drink water drink water.
the flood gates opened again when i left the house. stupid haze, its like a key to the flood gates. wth.... but only at times like these do you truly appreciate the fresh air you once had. haha. i misss it terribly... haiz.. please indonesia, find an alternative to this slash and burn, and that may turn out to be the key to your success. pleaseeeeee. i need fresh airrrr.
toodles!
[em]ily_ 5:58 PM
Monday, October 16
i dusted the score..
readied the piano..
i struck the chord..
i played the song..
and when i was done..
the tears were already running down...
how stupid i was to play it.
[em]ily_ 6:55 PM
the haze. is killing me! ive fallen ill and recovered like at least THREE TIMES ALREADY. THREE. me fallen ill three times alr in a matter of two weeks or so! its so retarded! and just now when i left to go to school to pass up smth, as soon as i left the house. my nose suddenly got flooded!(the flood gates opened) all the way, until when i came back home. then the flood disappeaed!(tehe flood gates closed again-.-)
wth.... oh well. tmrs bio pract, and im starting to panic, decided to revise alll my bio later after lunch.... drawing drawing, please dun ask some crappy question, and please NO FLOWERS!(even though the chances are quite high.) grr. please no nonsense questions! please!
oh welllll. back to mugging i guess... hmmms.....
maybe it'll be ok. maybe it wont. die lah. maybe i should haf looked at the librarys set of drawings. grr. oh wellll. i tink im blogging for the sake of blogging.
may the haze clear up soon, so that i wont keep tinking that im working in those channel eight heaven scenes.-.-
[em]ily_ 12:28 PM
Sunday, October 15
hallo people. im mugged so much today! im so proud of myself-NOT. i only did a physics paper... ok fine actually not too bad cos i also did an english comp and a compre, with summary!XD but my physics paper is quite screwed up as in.. so many mistakes. then like theres so many that has no answers. WHERES MY BROTHER WHEN I NEED HIM! sobs.HAHAHA. and when i dun need him, hes there infront of the comp. darn lah. hahaha. oh and i lost my voice! whee. its relaly gone.HAHA. and like i fell aslp this morning after breakfast? WTH! hahaha. ok im gna do a amaths paper later after dinner. lunch was pretty late today again, wonder how late dinner will be..oh well. bio practs coming, and i hafnt studied yet. die larh!xD
[em]ily_ 7:16 PM
Saturday, October 14
today was ac open hose. yes im sorry i kicked your shin, i dunno why i kicked oso. SORRY LAH.
it was quite fun lah. met sam at the busstop at 10 msth. then we went in, went to LT4 said hi saw thow, talked abit. then we went off, got a guided tour, saw the sports complex, which was quite cool! then went to cca place, sam and me realised that the ccas which tried to get our attention the most were the music based ccas, like CO, strings ensemble, harp ensemble...haha.
then mep talk. then went back, kept going to LT4 alot. then went to the academic areas, im amzed at how i can ask questions lakh!XD im sure i want to take hist now, even if i screw up sbq. with the jc format, i tink it sounds scary.haha.XD 6 page essays!XD FOUR 6 PAGE ESSAYS! oh well, but i udun mind, cos hist rocksXD
yup hung around. ok im really sorry, cos i had no idea why i kicked him.
XD
just did.XD loollllll, but sorry lahhhhhhh. okkkk sorryyyyy!
saw tim and many crescent ppl, and sheree, and etcetcetc
haha. anw after that, that ass HAD TO COME. grr, at the last moment somemore. wahlaos. then aft that lastly went to talk to a few mroe teachers, then went off. to clementi, ate lunch at 330!?! then after that went home. yup. i like acXD i still do.XDhahaha. oh well i went there just to get to know that area better, and not get too lost later on.=p haha. ok now i must mug to ensure that i can stay aft first three months.
it keeps repeating,and the tears keep coming...
what sucks about being a girl, is how when you really want to forget something, it will keep replaying in your head...its so annyoing. get out. getout. spare me..please. i want to have peace..please.... i want to stop vcrying. i want to stop thinking of that. i want to stpo hafing a pain in my heart.
nvm i shall try my best to divert my mind, ACACAC! samsamsam! biobiobioARGH!!! MUGMUGMUGMUG
[em]ily_ 8:53 PM
Friday, October 13
hallo! farewell was today. feeling damndamn nostalgic today! so i shall do a summary of my life in crescent. whats so good about it, and what makes me smile like a cheshire cat just tinking of it.XD[i nkow ravis gna kill me for these kind of sentence structure.HAHA.] but before that i tink ill just talk about today!XD it was quite hilarious actually, during lessons, i told jeanette, lets anyhow sit, later go JC cannot anyhow sit liao. so better take full opporutnity! HAHAHA. i was harldy listening during bio, i gave up after a while, we got our 50th anniversary jackets, the black fluff stuff keeps coming out, quite annoyin.
then after bio, had chem with eccentric mrs leow. she was burping into the friggin mike lah! hahaha. i swear she did smth she shouldnt haf! haha. then we had recess, and then emaths, where we just kept slacking! hahaha.and laurel kept trying to untie my shoelace!HAHA. but she cant~XD hahah. ok after that we went for farewell, had some problems with the chairs but nvmmm. aft taht, it started, with mrs lees speech, followed by the prize giving for improvement more than 17 n e 6 pointers. then cant give the usual, or else practically the entire school would go up!HAHA.XD then after taht we had the 50th anniversary video! SO COOL! haha. then after that there was the lynettes speech, and then it was the sec four video.THANK GOD HAZI DIN PUT IN SAD MUSIC! ill start crying i tell you!XD hahaha. then after that was the songs, the teachers sang and then we had enjia ad the otehr girl sing. the mep are damn good lah. playing all that!XD GO SAM!XD hahaha. school song, last one for me! sighz. then after all the crazy thing, most of us were scampering to the classrooms while ensuring that our candle flames dun die out!XD hahaha. after that we sat around (aft,many,many pictures!) and then we started receiving the prizes, and the report books, and the speeched. and MS NGGGG STOP SAYIN IM VIOLENT! (*whacks jeanette) ok maybe i am?=p
after that... everyone was crying.I DIN THO! amazing no? XD hgahaha. then i hung around, waiting for sam. then met sam went to eat lunch with her fren as well at lido there. then aft that me and sam went walkwalk at taka. open present tgt!XD hahaha, ate at delifrance, the cake thingy. they took so frigging long! grr.haha. then we went on home lah. was so sleepy i almost fell aslp on the bus standing up!! if only the annoying bus driver wasnt so jerky, until i can almost drop my books, i owuld haf slept well.HAHA. ok so now im back the picts from today are up. HERE
~absence makes the heart grow fonder~
anw im gna start talking about all the nostalgic memories, so dun mind me, XD
sec1
i still rmb orientation! i still rmb campfire nite, where 1c2 won the best class for campfire, and many other awards, our class left the deepest impression on the judges, i still rmb how i lost my voice that day, how i screamed and cheered! how crazy the practises were. how"strawberry shortcake,tuckleberry pie, 1c21c2 riseriserise. gimme a C gimme a 2! gimme a 1c2! chocolate fludge pie, sweet vanilla cake, 1c2 1c2, hiphip hooray! *stomp stomp clap**stompstomp clap* we will wewill step you flat like gingerbread, and never let you step us back, cos we will we will step you, OOH. step you, AHH. step you step you OOHLALA!" haha. i rmb the catching up with work. failing my first, history test. nv did again.hmph.XD how i used to abhor history lah. and how life rocked on. how i first joined cgssb. how i use to struggle with the clarinet, i still do you know.HAHA. and how i transferred to basscalrinet, how it was a bit difficult for me to transfer. ive always been too emotional for my own good. my first concert, on my birthday, the 29th of december as a guest band for dunearnite. wind and tree my first proper piece. happy march, fiefoerneik and i will follow him.haha. i still rmb my time taken to work out the instrument, my countless amount of practise. the times when fiona was still in charge, where she instilled fear in all the sec ones. soscary lah! and when she tested me and praised me.WHEE.XDHAHA. the containers class room.XD the band room and stuff. XD i rmb aircon! and store four!
sec2
alot of scary moments, alot of terrible times. but putting those horrid stuff outta my memory, times that were horrible shall be forgottem. liling first came in, the collaboration first started between me and liling. lots of practise, crez award, my first successful attempt into talentime. haha. me, sam,leemin, kejia, tania, qiuyi and sharyl. with anyone of us. we werent special, but we tried out best alrite. so ya.XD all the side performances. all the little bits here and there. practising for the final performance at vch. 11nov, if i rmb rite. our own concert. manymany pieces. it rocked tho it wasnt that good, but it was good for a starter. anw there was bandfiesta somewhere along the way, that ones screwed up tho.=p then there was rushing for finals. getting a bit stressed but still ok. the life during these times, were a bit rocky, but it was still good. still fun, still good ole happy times. liek times we acted out antigone in the fitness area, and slugged over the roll of thunder hear my cry. that day. i decided. NO MORE LIT. and this was the year i started to love hist. thanks mrsleo!
sec3
started my life in a new class. i at first wondered, how quiet this class might be. most of my really close friends were split up. most in c1, and everyone else where. sam was in s2. sadsad.XD but we're still damn good buddies rite laogong!XD still mrb the first day quite clearly. it was quite hilarious. i still rmb my teachers. the fun and all that. i rmbed how we met the four of us, through animes.XD like. OH ISNT THAT SAIYUKI! and then it went on. i rmb the craziness, of getting into cos fest, and all that which eventually due to certain unforseen cicumstances, i was unable to attend in the end. i still dun believe i look like oshitari lah. haha. tehre was AAD. which was funkyXD hahaha. there was many side performances, and i still rmb going crazy from workload when i first started. the alias ive developed. the fun i haf had. the amount of headaches i got for reasons i do not want to mention. i rmb wasbe conference, which was so fun. i rmb tune in that year. which was okXD HAHA. i rmb it well. i rmb the shocked and apprehensiveness of receiving positions. i rmb freaking out cos my grades were dropping-.- i rmb nco camp, which my school sent me for, which i would be eternally thankful for. i rmb band camps, and i rmb many fun things.XD irmb the unecessay stuff they did. but that i shall forget. i rmb syf, how we held each others hands and cried na cheered when we found out we got gold. i rmb how happy we were. irmb the great times with the band. i rmb kinki uni. i rmb how our exchanges were. i rmb the trauma then, and the fun times then. i rmb the vending machines, the warm food every monring. the sleepy busrides, the love we had for our kinki counterparts(*wink) irmb the fun and laughter those days. i rmb obs. i rmb how i used to hate it. i rmb RAFFLES group. i rmb the kayaking, and the scratches i got. i rmb sitting at the beach at nite watching the planes fly past our heads. i rmb how we trekked through the dense forest, with me as the navigator. i rmb the fun.i rmb the feast on the last nite. i rmb the cockroach. i rmb jeanettes bloody hands, i rmb freaking out.
sec4
this year was hectic. i rmb staying back form mock, i rmb stepping down. i rmb TO THE STARTS. i rmbed the preparations. i rmb the fun it was. the success it became. i rmb how thankful i felt bcos my frens came, how thankful i was for that one last concert before i graduate. ir mb my sadness at the stepping down. the longing for the bamd music along the years. irmb complaining about work and exams and papers,a nd stress. i rmb laughing with the four of them over anime crap. i rmb my lame jokes. i rmb how tiring lifewas. i rmb how everyday iw as so beat up nad dead. i rmb the work piles, and how stressed teachers got. i still rmb the schedule that chiamentioned when it all began. i rmb the stress of chi os, the sadness over my results. i rmb the stress for prelims, the disappointments in some subs and the happiness in others. i rmb the ac tune in. i rmb some sad things as well. which i dun really want to mention. i rmb the early nites. the crazy days, the lectures, trhe free periods. the insanity. and i rmb crescentian reunion, i rmb speech day. i rmb funfair. i rmb how crazy taht day was , i rmb all the effort we put in, the crazy fun, the booming success, kaily our ddr queen. i rmb farewell assmebly.
and that is all it. i dun regret my life. not all. i dun regret the aquintances with horrible ppl, cos they make me stronger. they helped me overcome what i had to, so that it will be ok. i nv regret my positions. cos i learned alot. i learned altoalot. i dun regret joining band. cos its my life, always been. we've stuck through thick and thin, its the most impt thing that has ever happened to me. every thing is related to it one way or another. i dun regret wat i ve done for my exams. cos its always been my best.(even if its last min best) even if i hated the teachers, i dun regret getting taught by them, cos if i did, i learned independence, to learn on my own. i dun regret anything at all. except maybe just that im still too childish to forgive HER. ive forgiven everyone in my life.. just cant seem to be able to forgive her.i dunno why..
so ill like tothank everyone.. everyone in crescent, during my four dear years. my classmates, my band mates, my section mates, my juniors, my seniors, my peers. my teachers, my instrucotrs, mr and mrs chua!, vp and mrs lee, the canteen shop owners, teh aunties and uncles who help clean up the place, teh photocopying lady, te bookshop lady. everyone. everyone wo helped made mythis four years so memorable. smth so dear to me(tho i used to cuss about it so much). smth that i will love foreve, and cherish with all my heart. its been a great four years. i love it. and i dun wish to change any part of it. thanks everyone, for helping me live through the bad times, and enjoy the good times. thanks for helping me become strong. thanks for the opporutnity, and the care. thanks for everything. thanks crescent girls school. it was really great to haf been a crescentian. and to now be part of the alumni.
as ms evelyn norris said, "good ole crescent!"
all the way ppl! lets do our best for crescent, lets rock the place, and leave no regrets. juniors, JIAYOUS!the responsibilties are passed on to you all. to peers, JIAYOUS FOR OS.WE CAN DO THIS,FOR OURSELVES AND FOR OUR SCHOOL! ALL THE WAY!
[em]ily_ 8:23 PM
Wednesday, October 11
oh well. i cant wait for friday! end of school, start of study break. and a proper night alone.. its weird i who hates being alone. suddenly really wants some time..alone. its so strange i cant stand it. maybe seclusion was my ideal choice after all.haiz..
h well i haf no mood to say anything else.
im in a pretty whirly whirly mood rite now. ok il try to cheer up as much as possible
[em]ily_ 9:15 PM
Tuesday, October 10
i know i hafnt been here for ages, so theres like stuff to talk about my cousin wedding, piles of hmwk, the airport, erm... more work. i guess. but i pretty much realised that if i blogged here for the past few days, i would spend the posts bitching about many many many many things.. and manymany people. that is worse than what i normally do. like over lessons an dwork.
first TAKKAIRE ERJIE!!! XIAOMEI LOVES YOU! drink lots of water!!! andand...er..just takkaires ok! take it easy for awhileee.!XD
i was supposed to wish many ppl happy birthday along the way, but ive been really lazy to even blog, so i kinda forgot. so happy birhtday to all those who haf had their birhtday.XDincluding james kor and papa.XD
anww. erm. i was supposed to say something. erer. oh ya. damn with all the work, i feel like im going to die anyyyy moment. the stack is so huge i cant take it.all must finish by this and then. ahhhhhhh. tens and thousands ofpapers per subject. i hafnt done much other work and all that. i relaly cant take it anymoreeeeeeee. oh well. so much work, so much tests, so long hours in school, so late hours. oh well.
anw recently i realises that more and more ppl are thinking of oging ac instead of their initial choice.quite intriging feels like there will be many many people who will be going to ac from crescent. thats what it feels like, but then again maybe im wrong.
i wish to bitch about ppl who dun noe their responsibilities, andthere are ppl who always think their rite, there are ppl who cant even listen to other opinons, let alone accept them. there are ppl who made me feel like incredible shit like, and there are ppl who has never realised that other ppl has a life and wont do things their way all the time.
but thats about all i should bitch on them on this blog, i dun want to bombard you all with all this nonsense. but oh well started on goong, and stil watching tsubasa. really i cant wait til os end, and so that i can really breathe properly and like haf fun.which i feel like i hafnt for ages.
and looks like someones gna become bankrupt soon. tsk.
[em]ily_ 6:55 PM
Friday, October 6
heyy. it ended. im thank ful for gd ole moderation. thank goodness! XD haha. anyway... thinks oh ya yest was retarded, i still dunno why i went there. if it wasnt for the checking the piano, and finding out that the piano thankfully had a pedal, if not my playing would sound like an elephant stomping.seriously.
tmrs the big show. ohw ells, since the piano is miked up i hope i dun screw up, and if i do i screw it up subtlely.
oh well im gna die! SO MUCH WORK! extra papers, wheni hafnt even finished these weeks papers. arghhhh so much hmwkand this weekend is so busy. anw kor will be going korea tmr nite. happy happy.XD
anw bleach 98 is kinda farni. ZARAKI ONI!XD YACHIRU!<3 haha shes so cute. poor ichinose thos. and yachiru sure was respectful.HAHA DIE GIN.DIEEEEEEEE. he looked like he was strangling ragniku LAH! GRRRRR.
oh well. back to the stack of work.byebye
[em]ily_ 6:47 PM
Wednesday, October 4
i feel a bit cheated now. cos at first i thought i got 9 for l1r5. but now i realised that im still short of one subj. and tmrs 3 subjs...die lah.
im really hoping for a miracle. i hope mod will save two subjs tmr. please.please. or alteast one. oh man.....
but shit for eng. i told ya ill cry. haiz. and physics! screw physics. other than the addition of 5%from MY which isnt exactly mod, cos they were gonna add on no matter wat anw. these two subs NO moderation? why! why!
heck nvm please give mod for the other two. please please.
oh man i haf no mood now.. byebye.
[em]ily_ 5:31 PM
Tuesday, October 3
hallo. tmr is Dday no.1 Dday no.2 is on thursday. i think im gna die real bad with enough atomic bombs to turn me to smitterins. been receiving negative feedback all day. im so annoyed. im so scared. my heart is pumping faster than faster than..beepbeep. tmr how! im gna bring tons of tissue tmr. at least 2 big packs. if i cry just let me cry. ive been on the verge of crying at least ten times this two days. out of stress. i feel so stressed and so completely worn down. work and all that. mocks killed me today. it was frewaking exhausting
im realy scared for tmr. more than i ever haf been.
i hope i dun break down tmr. shit make it 11 times this 2 days. i feel like crying now!
tmr is dday. and thursday is horrible i just NOE it
[em]ily_ 6:38 PM
Monday, October 2
THREE MOCKS IN ONE DAY. tmrs gna be a killer. ahhh. and we just found out today! anyone wanna make a guess which three mocks they are? bio. chem. phy. WOW! i feel so exhilarted!-.- and i couldnt care less if they scold me for not oging for the emaths stuff tmr. no matter wat they say, even if it turns out i failed emaths(touchwood), i still do regret wat i have done. neither do i feel repentent. i told my mum and she said its ok. cos anyway, im partially sick. im dead beat. and i feel like i haf a rock instead of a brain. tonite is gna be a late nite, tmr is gna be a late nite.. the rest of these two weeks are gna be late nites. my school is INSANE. need i say further. they are drivinig us crazee. i swear im gna jusend up killing myself bc of them. its still early in the post prelims schedule and im feeling more pressured than a pressure cooker. add on the practise for the church wedding. im losing my mind. i wonder if i even survive these two weeks. im going insane and absolutely crazy. i blame my stress on the school.grrr. ok i was being whiney. as i always am. but seriously. one day im just gna shoot myself. im already starting to be unable to take all this crap. and things are gna get worst.
anw its confirmed a trip to jpn from 14-20 dec. to central jpn the itinery looked quite cool.SHINSAIBASHI.food PARADISE! WHOO.
oh well thats all im looing for to survive this horrid last few weeks. if you want to see me alive after this two weeks and beyond. pray for me.LOL
[em]ily_ 7:19 PM
Sunday, October 1
hallo. im here now, to inform you that emily has officially gone bonkers! i think its the fault of the medication that i haf been consuming these past few days. Have i mentioned?
case1:
On friday, i was drawing up the columns for the post prelims schedule, i KNEW i had to draw six columns, because i must have one column for time, rite? I forgot and only drew 5! somehow, i just forgot! then nvm i wrote the headings for the boxes, "monday, tuesday,friday!" and then praba started laughing, and only then i realised that i wrote friday instead of wednesday.
case2:
i was having a sore throat on friday, so i did not take stuff i shouldnt yet, when nandhu asked me whether i wanted chocolates, i said no. However when she asked me whether i wanted icecream, i walked right into cheers and picked one. I only realised i wasnt supposed to take it, when nandhu told me on the way back to school-.-
case3:
saturday, amanda mama told me to buy red and black markers for the shirts. so i went to the popular at the orchard mrt, and i kept repeating to myself, red and black marker, red and black marker. so i bought the markers, and met mama at junction 8, after we bought the shirts, we went to macs to do the shirts, then i realised. OMG. i bought a black and a BLUE marker.
how smart can i get?
case 4:
and just now when i was playing the piano part for mozarts concerto for clarinet. i was finally able to play that annoying part. and then suddenly, i stopped you know why. i suddenly was like uhoh, where am i again? in the middle of the part when i was playing! i suddenly stopped for such a stupid reason! IM LOSING IT. omg.
there are much much more incidents like that, just that i cant rmb any of them anymore.-.- haiz, i swear if on thursday i get off at bishan instead of amk to go for the practise for my cousins wedding(cos i always get mixed up between bishan and amk. gawd noes why) and then miss my bro, who wlil hire a taxi and wait for me there. i think i would go mad. seriously.
ok back to chemistry. i feel like a rock landed on my head. I SWEAR its the fault of the medication. antedunnodunno wat. it works better than a rock. but amazingly, i fought against it last nite and stayed up to do amaths, unconsciously actually, i didnt think it was that late, until i saw my watch. and besides the noise from downstairs midautumn festicval celebrations just ended. it was kinda noisy.
[em]ily_ 10:51 AM
Saturday, September 30
they dun call me a perfectionist for nth.
oh well today was fun!
i think i allowed my sacarsm to work to its fullest todaY!haha
anw to the king lagger, im still lagging. keep waiting.
HAHA
seeya.
[em]ily_ 8:15 PM
Friday, September 29
hallo! emily here, today was really a reality check for me. like seriously, im screwed for prelims. everything during bio, chem nad physics, made NO sense to me, like hey, thats new! i din noe that when i was doing the paper! OMG lah!
anw morning i reached school about 7. did gthe eng thingy, feeling like a log, despite my early nite the day before, i needed the sleep my medication was turning me into jelly. the eng thingy, i think most of us wrote really weird werid stuff.HAHA.
then after english we had bio. mrs yip went through the paer, though we did not get it back actually. every question, seems like i wrote smth really off, and they tricked us for bio..again. practical was ok.. hopefully it'll pull up my written paper
then we had recess.
then we had chem. i swear that mrs leow acts..funny. shes like possessed. seriously.she acts all funny and queer. and shes quite idiotic, she wrote in fine ink on the white board, and oviously the ppl at the back of the hall can see nothing. and when we told her we couldnt see she said we were lying-.- so i couldnt understand her. so i ignored her. stupidly i din write down my answers on the question paper, and thusi haf no idea how many wrongs are there in my chem ppr 1 like the rest do. sigh. smart me. the mrschia came in for paper 1, and i think im dead meat, all my answers dont seem to match up to hers. which is BAD.
after chem we had amaths, which was a serious bore, and i truly dun want to talk about it.
after which me nandhu, praba and me went to cheers to eat lunch of cup noodlles, i miss my cup noodles! but the water wasnt hot,and since we had no time, we couldnt wait for it tto my properly cooked. and how great cos i was feeling better i forgot about my cough nad cold and i had half an icecream. oh to top it off, i ate all the extra stuff in prabas nad nandhus cos they couldnt finish. gawd i feel so gluttony and so fat.grrr.
then we had english. which wasnt so bad, wanted to photocopy the stuff, but there was a long queue so shall do it later on monday or smth. see how.then went home, nandhu and i agreed to go brisk walking from the busstop to the fareast busstop once a week. just this tinyyyy stretch of road.HOW RETARDED.,hahahah.
i think im getting worse and worse at being retarded. but this nose is killing me. i think i need some medi soon!and seriously, im getting annoyed, i dunno who replaced my nose with a tap while i was asleep! haiz. ok back to amaths nowww. byebey!
[em]ily_ 5:16 PM
Thursday, September 28
hallooo. today was quite a fun day. games were fun. FUNFUN. hahaha. like seriously. i was witht he wipe out group, tho we din win, it was damn fun! then we also played dodgeball, which is what our class rocks in, our class like trains in it lah! and like we were cheering our classes on more than the house.LOL. dodge ball felt good, all our training realy worked out. c2 played damn well. YAY c2!
then we had nj and ac talks. i dun really want to talk about certain things, but HAHA. stupid kors face in the presentation. diaoo. haha. anw im just annyed at how retarded some people are, like how annoying they are ,and how childish too. as well as how delusionised they are.
anw. ya i cant think of anything now, i need to go for dinner.grr. stupid ass for screaming unnecessarily.
bye.
[em]ily_ 5:39 PM
Wednesday, September 27
hallo.XD today was an interesting day i supposeXD im HUNGRY. guess i shouldnt haf skipped lunch.=p today as i said was an amusing day, it started with sajc talk, i admit that the guy was a good speaker. and his lameness is acceptable. sacarasm as well. oh well, anw, after that was hjc, it was pretty interesting, although certain parts were....-.-' then after that we had our sense and sensuality talk as always we watched a stupid movie, which was highly amusing, we were laughing at others demise. tsk,HAHA. then we had a bunch more talks. like the am i saying yes or no to sex-.- sharon goh is really...i dunno the rite word. funny i guess? then had the break ups to break down thingy. which was kinda stupid too.
anw, then we had acsib talk, the guy is really like a santa claus!HAHA. hes so nice! and the course actually sounds nice. but then again, its super expensive! and ya hahaha. and the smu thingy.XD then after all this.. went home. nothing much left, but anw, the acsib guy told us that we were better than the uhhmm school as well as the acs school down barker road.HAHAHA. rubbish lah.XD
ohwellll we only listen to people who can speak i guess.HAHA. oh welllll. i guess i ought to go now anw. okkk, byeeeee
[em]ily_ 5:25 PM
Tuesday, September 26
[em]ily_ 7:11 PM
Sunday, September 24
hallo peoplee. i slacked like crap today, completely refused to mug. i was sitting in front of the teevee and playing final fantasy 9 the entireeeeeeeeeee day, then after that i am like now! using the computer.HAHAHA
the starting credits were hilarous tho... "produced and concieved by...." blame ist on overexposure to shuzhen.tsktsk.HAHAHA
oh well. im so incredibly bored. butttt TMR! getting those shitrs! YAYYYY. guess ill TRY dressing up for once. but normally they end up unsuccessful.HAHA
oh well... i WANNA playyy ff9. oh no im addicted again.HAHA. im like the scary trainer type.. i train and train and train, until too imba, then my kor will tell me to stop training, then ill slak and become weak again, then ill train and train and train.HAHA. anmd im TERRIBLE in responding fast.hahaha.so some of teh side missions are reallyyyyyy horriblyyy done.
but oh well tmrs a holiday! im going shopping YAY!
[em]ily_ 8:37 PM
Saturday, September 23
ITS OVER !
ITS OVER !
ITS OVER !
I OVERCAME MT PRELIMS!
WHEEEE. so i decided ill take a SHORT break. anw the study plan is done and up. and im all ready, but the plan starts next week=p for now il just read and read the dictionary. yesterday was the first nite i could just close my eyes for a while and rest welllll.
lessons learned from this prelims.
1) when i dun go to class, i dun absorb everyone elses nervous aura, and i can still attain a state of calmness b4 the exams. (much is more clam then usual, for MOST of hte subjects.)
2) i really need to prepare early.
3) i need to breathe more
4) i think i really should sleep more(tho its not gna work, unless i haf finished my work)
and plus when im really stressed, its at nite, most likely resulting in my calmness the next day..
5) i should just... try.. to get things rite. for once.
haiz. oh welllll!!!! ITS OVERRR(tho i am reallyyyyy worried for physics pract)
anw about physics pract, i made.. the most horrible mistake, anw physics students worst nightmare.i cant believe it! MY CALCULATOR SCREWED UP ON ME! omg. and that calculation was the first calculation in the entire experiment. and like. i screwed it up. alllllllll up. all my recordings are wronggggg!!!!!!!!!!!!! i just.....hope that waht praba, sabrina, jefri they all say that its ok, as long as theres a smooth curve, the rite decimal place and stuff. you will stlil get marks, evn if you go t the initial value wrong. I HOPE SO.I REALLY REALLY HOPE SO.
and the design experiment.. was quite ok, i rmbed what kor said and used the formula get the gradient method.. butttt there wasnt enough space..i really wonder whether that was the rite way... buttt. at least i finished the exp on time... even if i did screw up.
oh well. so for a while, ill draw abit and use a bit and sleep a bit and read a bit and then... search for hedgehog pictures a bit.and work on my new blogskin with a picture i drew like centuries ago. and then... ill start work again.HAHA.
monday going out going out. CANT WAIT!
hahaha.
oh ya, got more hand me downs. i hope they fit just nicely... buttttt it makes me unwilling to buy more clothes from my parents! sobs.HAHA
okkkk
thats all over, thats all donee. and then illllllll go and work on my new blogskin! BYEBYE
[em]ily_ 9:51 AM
Thursday, September 21
silence is to me as milk is to hedgehogs.
(for those who dun noe hedgehogs loveee milk, but milk is like poison to them.)
physics pract is all thats left, all thats left, all thats left.
physics pract is all thats left, and then itd all be o-ver!
(to the tune "this is the way we wash our hands")
saturday i plan to slack, sunday too. monday im going out with my mum. and tuesday is lady in me day, so im going shopping on monday for tuesday. wednesday is sexuality talk day and some jc talksday. thursday is games and talks day, where we will see acjc with oniisamas face on it!-.- haha. then.. i would say results probably would come out on friday. and what the hell am i talking about next week so soon! ok i need to start planning my mugging so i wont lose track before olevels. this is so damn exhausting.
and anw, smths i really wonder whetehr theres a rapist or anarsonist in our school, cos all the kids downstairs. just scream scream scream.like their bodies are burning in intense heat or like they are getting raped or smht. wth. if i dun do well its like gna be 50% their fault i was spending half my time cursing, cos i couldnt concentrate. and i couldnt do one question properly, bet there are like many carelsess mistakes now.shit lah.
wth, seriously, cant they just shut the f up.
oh well tmr tmr.
byebye!
[em]ily_ 2:56 PM
Wednesday, September 20
oh ya i forgot to mention! i had a reallyreally really weird nightmare last nite. like someone was like accusing me of trying to murder them! then suddenyl the person told me"shit, emily, dun breathe, someone is trying to poison us with gas now." and then i was like WTH. and i woke up. hahaha. and i know i had another weird one,. and i think i was dreaming that there was tis like food fair thingy.haha. sometimes i really am amazed at how my mind thnks. like how i dreamt that my frenz were getting gunned down by a machine gun on stage while i could only watch. *shudders. and how i dreamt that sange gunned down jametty.*shudders again
nandhu says im violent, then again, maybe i am?=p haha. and like.. i was practing the piano song,for the clarinet concerto, and i improved!YAY. one last hurdle left.and i can conquer it!XD wheeXD
ok goodniteXD
[em]ily_ 9:31 PM
wellowello. today was a friggin interesting day, that was slightly- annoying..in away. guess. ya.
HAHA. okkkk. so i woke up at 645, then i went to do the usual morning stuff, and then i left for school at 730, caught the 740 190 bus, everyone was giving me the stares which had the message"why is there a cescent girls school student going to school at this time?!"kind of look, but i guess i can blame them rite? i mean. its not normal to see a student in the bus at this hour. so fine i got a seat, thankfully, the bus got into a jam, and the entire system was sticky and sweet- YA RITE. it was so longgg, and boringggg. but i survived, and reached the busstop at fareast to wait for 132. i saw TEN 190s, FIVE 700s, TWO 171s, TWO 105,TWO 143s, TWO 54s,THREE 502s. and FIVE of those SBS buses which were reserved for the imf meeting people. and only then! did stupid 132 come.waiting for almost thirty mins is NO JOKE. gawd. it made my mood go a complete downhill, esp since i was already so frigging, tired.
ok then after that i reached school, i entered the class to see two sleeping beauties, eileen and kailing. haha. then i went to the toilet, came back and saw shuzhen, praba an dwangyue. the former two has something on about milk, which i haf no interest on finding out what. then reading through and stuff, we went to the hall. sat down, and had the two most sarcastic teachers incharge of us. which made things so funny!!! like ms azlin, she told me not to burn down the labs.HAHAHA. then we went to the labs, and there nice sweet smeeling onions, and the good ole potato awaits us, with also unripened, but oxidising banana. and guess what, i finished everthing with almost one hour to spare. i was..very sian. i started lengthening my answers, redrawing watching convection currents in my water bath, washing up. then setting up again to redo one of the tests. and burning myself TWICE. i swear the bunsen burner is a weirddddd one. i was just sososooooo bored, and the safety goggles..were blurring my vision as i just stared at the boiling water bath with the convection currentr, and the water rises and sinks and rises and sinks. and finallly, i dunno how, but the paper ENDED, gawd.
then went for quaratine, where i saw dear ole jeanette and liuqing, went toilet, and then led ehr almighty higness back-.- then let sabo and jeanette hear the fujis english lesson. sending them into fits of laughter. then we concentrated, and i plugged in my ear pieces, and raised the volume and did geog, and apparently the volcano erupted as we had predicted. they din heed the warning and they got what they deserved.HAHA. i din realise actually cos my music kept me from hearing outside stuff, and besides mr tan is a basic lava volcano, quiet explosions. but it was all espected.
went home with nandhu, bought lunch. bathed, and now doing geog mcqs. im so sians rite now. but oh well, i must persevere.may i survive.
silence is my best friend, and my worst enemy.
anw heres some nice lyrics from one of the naruto starting/ending theme(i cant rmb which one)
sousa kanashimi wo yasashisa ni
[em]ily_ 3:19 PM
Tuesday, September 19
hellow. todays physics, wasnt as scary as normal crescent physics papers can be. but stilllll.... either i din noe, or i wasnt sure. my mum claims its possible its my personality thats why i haf no confidence in my answers. i say its lak of practise. she says i should do smth sbout that part of me. i said maybe later.
but hells has passed. for now. tmr is drawing test, biology pract. oh how i wish we din haf to draw some rubbish stuff.i was drawing just now. relalyyyy wish they wont ask some retarded shit for drawing. haiz. like the last time in olevels kiwi fruit thingy.i think i should grab some fruits to draw.><
tmr there is study period.HAHA. quarantine. will do geog. gtta finish the tys mcqs. yupp. jisyou!XD haha. i shall concentrate tmr. i will i will i will.
omg, hedgehogs<3
bio tmr.. should be ok. i hope. i needd it to pull up my main paper.
ok. should read my past practicals now. and revise all the drawings i just drew again, then i can haf an early nite. maybe. or i shold do some geog first=p hahaha. ok hopefully i wont be so lazy.
four more papers!
JIAYOUS EMILY!!!! JUST A BIT MORE!
YAY!
[em]ily_ 7:13 PM
Monday, September 18
actually hu cares about the tensions in the string and stuff like that.
i care about the tension in my head.
i care about the way my eyes are move left and right, and not how the alternating current works.
i care about my mess in my heads with all the electrons floating left and right and ehre and there, giving me a headache. not about how conduction works.
hu cares which light bulb lights up with the current flow and power rating. i care about my human brain juice waking up my mind and creating the "ting" light bulb idea thingy.
hu cares which side is noth wihich side is south. as long as i can tell which ones my right and which ones my left hand isnt it enuf?
and who cares about gamma rays! i just need to know whos my mama what!
and hu cares how the light gets refracted, as long as i can see can alr rite!
and ok, i haf enough of condeming physics. im just stressed. ignore me.lol.
physics.is scary, esp when you cant do any of the questions in the practics papers. i hate electricity. anything but that is fine.anthing after specific heat capacity..makes no sense at all.
so wish me luck while i suffer the tormenting-ness of physics tmr.
maybe i still live.
[em]ily_ 4:32 PM
Sunday, September 17
XD i did an interesting quiz and the results told me my priorities. well its quite true i guess it came out like this
family,career,pride,money,love.
from most impt to least.
lol. i guess its quite true.XD
haha. anw. i find the later part fanri too. dogs are sup to be u, not my fault when you say dog, i say cute! haha. and then cats is your partner, not my fault again, i hate cats, so it was scary, so my partner(in the future) is scary.LOL. and then wat. its also not my fault i LIKE coffee. and said it was aromatic. how would i know they linked it with THAT. and my life is as huge. as wat i feel the sea is.LOL. i almost typed beautiful, as in for sea. but then again, lifes NEVER pretty.
like now. i feel like shit. sibling rivalry always sucked. and seriously smths i really wonder. who IS the older sibling, me. or him. ok enough complaints, i blogged too much today. goodnite
and wish me luck for chem pract, oh nice lyrics in the earlier post if you din see itXD
[em]ily_ 9:07 PM
Nobody knows who I really am